This episode is packed full of so many concepts, we were nervous to do the write-up. Join us for a candid conversation between Michael, Bryan, and our exceptional guest Chris Dinelli as we unpack flexibility as a concept, mistakes, learning through pain, aggressive course-correction, pivots vs. 180s, discipline, spending time alone, and more!
Key Points:
Chris is a Mechanical Engineering student and great friend of ours that spent years working jobs he was dispassionate about and not living up to his potential. He made the CHOICE to take control of his life and carve out a lane of success, discipline, and smart choices. This was not easy, but the things worth going after never are.
Flexibility is defined as being able to see something that is difficult in your life and possessing the ability to work around it, to not get dragged down in negativity or victimhood. It keeps the end goal in sight and is fluid; it takes advantage of opportunities as they present themselves.
Life, success, and achievement cannot always be forced. Flexibility and patience allow opportunities to come to YOU as long as you put yourself in positions to capitalize on them.
Success, according to Chris, is a daily grind of putting yourself in positions to win.
Flexibility is not always beneficial. When you are too flexible in certain areas of life – relationships, career, health, etc. – you may inadvertently compromise on other priorities.
Situations that appear “good” or “bad” in the moment may turn out to be otherwise in the long-run. Keep the big picture in mind.
Lack of humility prevents objective self-assessment. It is important to be critical of oneself, to honestly assess your life and make adjustments based on your goals. Think of your childhood self and whether or not he/she would be proud of the person you’ve become.
We tend to “know” when we are making mistakes, when we’re making the wrong decisions. The challenge is accepting reality and making the choice to change. Many people never change. We cannot control anyone other than ourselves.
Mistakes are inevitable. It signifies our humanity. So long as we can learn from mistakes, take time to ourselves to heal when necessary, and reemerge into the world stronger and more grounded, we can take trauma and turn it into invaluable lessons.
Internalize hurt. Resist self-medication unless absolutely necessary. Spending time alone, becoming your own friend, and reflecting on where you messed up can expedite the healing process. Some practical tips are to remove social media and surround yourself with friends and family that can support you when you’re low.
How to start from the bottom:
Change perspective
Accept reality
Don’t hold yourself to the standards of others
It is never too late to make positive changes. Like the adage “age is just a number,” your perception imposes limits on your ability to work towards goals that matter.
Pivoting vs. 180:
Take the path of least resistance
Pivoting is defined as “to turn from.” Repentance follows this definition.
We are ALWAYS pivoting as we move through life. Pivots are ideal when the path is defined and favorable. 180s are ideal when the path is wrong or fails to serve you anymore. Complacency is a death-sentence.
Spend time alone. We are robbed of this at this point in history with the prevalence of technology, smart phones, and social media. It teaches you what you want and don’t want and allows you to become your own friend.
Abstain from things you love. Discipline is CRITICAL on the road to success, whatever that looks like for you (if you don’t know what that looks like, consider spending time alone
