Embodied with Elizabeth Patricia DiAlto Figueroa

I'm reviving the Ask Elizabeth segment and today's theme is relationships. I asked our community via social media to submit questions and they did not disappoint!

Enjoy and keep an eye out on social for next months question request. The topic will be Cultivating Joy.

Today's guest, Bari Tessler is a financial therapist. We've been acquainted for many years and more recently had the opportunity to drop in more deeply at a women's leadership event. Bari is a financial therapist and the creator and author of The Art of Money.

It's no secret that I LOVE soaking up wisdom from women who are further along on their life path than I am and this is one of the reasons I was pumped to have her on the show! Bari's big truth was about getting her ass kicked by perimenopause.

From there we discussed how she's working to leave a legacy both in her business and through parenting her son. She also shared her story, the training and experience that led her to create her integrative approach to money (which includes the antidote to money shame!), and the relationship between urgency, responsibility and thoroughness.

This was one of those interviews I wished could have gone for a whole extra hour, we'll definitely have to have Bari back. Enjoy and share!

About Bari Tessler:

Bari Tessler Linden, M.A., is a Financial Therapist, Mentor Coach, Mama-preneur, and the Founder of The Art of Money. She has guided thousands of people to new, empowered, and refreshingly honest relationships with money through her nurturing, body-centered approach. Her methodology weaves together personal, couple, and creative entrepreneurial money teachings into one complete tapestry. She is the founder of The Art of Money: a global, year-long money school, which integrates Money Healing, Money Practices and Money Maps. Her work has been featured on Oprah.com, Inc.com, the Huffington Post, US News & World Report, Reuters Money, The Fiscal Times, USA Today, The Cut, Girlboss, Nerd Wallet, The Simple Dollar, REDBOOK Magazine and Experience Life Magazine. Bari is also the author of The Art of Money: A Life-Changing Guide to Financial Happiness, published by Parallax Press. Learn more about Bari at: http://baritessler.com/

Something I've been noticing on the podcast lately is I'm talking less with guests about what they do and more about how they're doing and what they're up to in life overall. Today's conversation felt like one of those.

My guest, Kathryn Budig is an internationally celebrated yoga teacher and author known for her accessibility, humor, and ability to empower her students through her message, "aim true."

Her big truth was about finding happiness within the pursuit of success. From there we discussed a variety of ways the pursuit of success makes us unhappy. From pursuing things because we think we "should" to the ways we use social media, seek validation and other forms of self-compromise.

We talked about sustaining ourselves vs pushing or hustling and we also explored feeling comfortable in our skin as our bodies change and we go through difference phases, her experience of coming out in a relationship with a woman after her divorce from her husband.

To say this one is packed and juicy is an understatement. Enjoy!

About Kathryn Budig:

Kathryn Budig is an internationally celebrated yoga teacher and author known for her accessibility, humor, and ability to empower her students through her message, "aim true." The Kansas native graduated from the University of Virginia with a double degree in English and Drama before moving to Los Angeles, where she trained at Yogaworks under the tutelage of her mentors, Maty Ezraty and Chuck Miller.

With over a decade of experience in her field, Budig served as the yoga editor to Women's Health magazine for five years, contributed recipes and sat on the Yahoo Health Advisory Board, and regularly contributes to Yoga Journal, The New Potato, and MindBodyGreen. She was an athlete in Under Armour's "I WILL WHAT I WANT" campaign, the co-host of the Free Cookies podcast, teaches regular online classes on Yogaglo.com, and is the founder of her animal project, Poses for Paws. She is the creator of the Aim True Yoga DVD produced by Gaiam, author of The Women's Health Big Book of Yoga and Aim True.

What You'll Hear: 6:43 Navigating social media as a content creator 16:32 Stability, roots, and cycling through change over time 29:01 Handling how our bodies change over time 37:2

You'll hear it all throughout today's interview, but this is a really special one. Never before have I had a guest on the show who I've had the immense pleasure and honor of being part of their journey and mission. Jennifer Arthurton is the founder of Old Chicks Know Sh*t, a company she founded because in her own words:

"As I searched for inspiration for this next chapter, I began to realize that you have to dig pretty deep to find examples of middle age women living kick ass lives that didn't involve sitting around waiting for kids to visit, grandchildren and retirement. And although those are lovely, I want the second half of my life to be about me. I've given my all to my career and family and all the other "have to's" in life and now its time to do what makes me happy."

Her big truth was around surrender and trust, so we explored how those things helped her leave a 20 year corporate career to not only pursue what she's doing now but also unpack the lifetime of programming and conditioning that women receive in our culture.

She also shared her experience of being raised and living in three different countries, how that shaped her and the lens she experiences life through.

I could go on all day about how much I love and respect this woman, but I'll stop here and just let you listen to the episode. Enjoy and share!

About Jennifer Arthurton:

Jennifer Arthurton leads of a community of women called Old Chicks Know Sh*t where she offers inspiration and support to women navigating the often-confusing chapter of mid-life. Having made her own midlife course corrections, Jennifer is a passionate advocate of the inherent power and knowledge that women possess at a time when they often feel overlooked and doubt themselves most. As a marketing strategist she also works with brands to connect them to this influential and lucrative midlife segment. Jennifer regularly appears as a guest on blogs and podcasts targeted to the mid-life segment and is available as a motivational speaker for marketing conferences, women's conferences and events.

JLove Calderon is a social entrepreneur, activist, author, coach, creator, producer and director of TV and Film. Storytelling and justice are at the heart of her work and this conversation is so moving, I highly recommend listening when you can be fully present and take some notes. I loved this woman's heart so much and her gentle and clear way of talking through hard topics.

She explained the historical movement of colorblindness and shared her personal journey as an activist for 20+ years, some hard truths she's had to face along the way and the many valuable lessons she learned from her time in gangs and the hip hop industry.

Her big truth was that most of her life decisions were based on unhealed trauma and limiting beliefs.

From there we discussed how to: -Navigate racism, spiritual bypass and privilege -Educate without shaming, and -Unpack your privilege without dulling your light

Enjoy and share this one far and wide! Thank you.

xo, E

About JLove Calderón:

JLove is a social entrepreneur, activist, author, coach and a creator, producer and director of TV and Film. Storytelling and justice is at the heart of her work.

Her short films, ASIA-ONE: Expect The Unexpected, and From Gangs to Gardens, have garnered an audience of over 18 million viewers. She co-produced 11:55, a feature film by Ben Snyder and Ari Issler. JLove has co-created, executive produced and directed five TV pilots including The Message featuring Joey Bada$$, The Sound of Revolution, Breaking Bias with Grammy Award winning J.Ivy, and received distribution for her TV Series We The People with REVOLT and The Sound of Revolution received distribution from Seed & Spark. She produced and directed two music videos, The Universal Blueprint by 7TRiiiBES and Keeps Me Up by Beat Boxing champion of the world, Kaila Mullady.

JLove is the author of That White Girl (Atria Books/Simon & Schuster, 2007), which has been optioned for film. She has also co-edited four books: We Got Issues! A Young Woman's Guide to a Bold, Courageous and Empowered Life with Rha Goddess (New World Library, 2006); Conscious Women Rock the Page! Using Hip-Hop Fiction to Incite Social Change, with Marcella Runell Hall, E-Fierce, and Black Artemis (Sister Outsider Publishing, 2008); a contributor in Who's Your Mama, The Unsung Voices of Women and Mothers, edited by Yvonne Bynoe (Soft Skull, 2009) Love, Race, and Liberation: 'Til the White Day is Done with Marcella Runell Hall (Love-N-Liberation Press, 2010); and Occupying Privilege (Love-N-Liberation Press, 2012), winner in the social change category of the National Indie Excellence Awards; and a contributor in UnCommon Bonds: Women Reflect on Race and Friendship edited by Kersha Smith & Marcella Runell Hall (Peter Lang, 2018).

JLove is a strong voice in the fight for racial justice, and is a member of the SURJ (Showing Up for Racial Justice) National Leadership Team, SURJ Connectors Co-Founder and Creative Director, as well as COO of the Black Girl Animators Collective. jloveglobal.com @jlovecalderon

Today's guest, Karen Hawkwood is one of those people I've never met in real life but somehow have a deep kinship with. I LOVE the way this woman's mind and heart come together to articulate the nuance and complexity of life's realest issues.

Her big truth was that most people are cowards, meaning--most people are not in integrity. From there we discussed:

-Cowardly moments -How to actually "do integrity" - what we give, and how to turn our insights on ourselves -Establishing a relationship to "that which is beyond" -Her definition of forgiveness, which includes an important distinction between responsibility and accountability. -The difference between shame and accountability -How anger and hurt protect us from each other -A full spectrum view of death and rebirth processes that includes the dying and being dead part -Grief and identity, and more.

This one is definitely a listen more than once, take notes, invite your friends, and take your time to process it kind of conversation. Enjoy!

xo, E

About Karen Hawkwood:

Karen Hawkwood (also known as KJ Sassypants, or on occasion Saint Sassypants) lives at the intersection of Down Street and Starry Spiral Way. She sees more about you than you really want her to, and then uses that to pave your path into the darkness, and through it to where you become All Of You At Once. She'll see all the way to your bones and then light them on fire so they illuminate you like a lamp. She promises nothing, offers an odd assortment of things you didn't know you wanted, and occasionally drops a jewel or a small bird. Her methods involve measurable things like coaching, astrology, intellect, and vulgar language, and much more erratic and dubious things like hearing spider feet, consorting with mythical creatures, sending flowers down in the well bucket and drawing up strange songs, and laughing at her own jokes.

Today's episode goes deep into unhealthy relationship patterns, abuse and victimhood. What I loved about our guest Avery Neal, is her whip smart, compassionate and gentle demeanor while navigating an intense topic.

Her truth was about the resilience of the human spirit. From there we explored: -Big hard words - abuse and victim - and why it's important to use them, unpack them and own them when applicable -Striking a balance between sussing out your partner's issues and your own issues -Behavioral patterns of abusers and how to spot the warning signs -Behavioral patterns of "victims" or those susceptible to abusive partnerships -Lots of examples from her practice and more gems from her book.

I know every time I do an episode like this, unfortunately it resonates with A LOT of people. Be gentle with yourself if it hits the mark for you and as always, do not hesitate to contact us or reach out if you need help. Since I spoke out about my own abusive relationship last year, I've received so many messages from others sharing their stories. This topic is a really close one to my heart.

xo, E

About Avery Neal:

Avery Neal, MA, LPC is a practicing psychotherapist, author, speaker and consultant. In 2012 she opened Women's Therapy Clinic, which has locations in both The Woodlands, Texas and in Denver, Colorado. She specializes in depression and anxiety at all stages in a woman's life. She has worked extensively with women suffering from prenatal anxiety and postpartum depression in addition to helping women recovering from divorce and healing from emotional abuse. She is passionate about empowering women discover their own inner strength, leading to higher self-esteem, confidence and overall life satisfaction.

Avery is the author of If He's So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad?: Recognizing and Overcoming Subtle Abuse. Her articles and interviews have been published by Oprah.com, Best Self Magazine, Hitched Magazine, Bustle, POPSUGAR and PKWY Magazine. In 2017, the International Association of HealthCare Professionals nominated her as one of the top psychologists in Houston.

I got to chat with today's guest, Amber Rae right on the heels of her new book coming out. We explored a ton of things related to life and creativity. Her big truth was around the truths she doesn't want to look at. She asked the question, "Do you tell your journal the truth?" Which sparked a playful and deep conversation around our willingness to look at our shadows, anxieties and worries.

From there we talked about: -Capitalism -How wonder is curiosity in action -Being slightly more curious than afraid -How wonder helps with negative emotions -The difference between fear and intuition -Developing characters to relate to yourself objectively -Identifying our "creative aches" and more...

Whether you live a creative life or not, there are so many gems in this discussion about navigating the things that keep us from our fullest love, expression and joy everyday. Enjoy and share!

xo, E

About Amber Rae:

Called a "Millennial Motivator" by Fortune and "The Brené Brown of Wonder" by Mind Body Green, Amber Rae is an author, artist, and speaker whose work invites you to live your truth, befriend your emotions, and express your gifts.

Her writing blends raw, personal storytelling with actionable aha! moments and has reached more than 5 million people in 195 countries. Her public art has spread to more than 20 countries, and she's spoken to and collaborated with brands like Kate Spade, Apple, Amazon, and Unilever.

Amber has been featured in The New York Times, TIME, Fast Company, BBC, ABC World News, Tim Ferriss's blog, and more.

Previously, Amber helped launch six best-selling books as Chief Evangelist of Seth Godin's publishing experiment and started an "accelerator for your life" called The Bold Academy.

She lives in Brooklyn and around the world with her fiancé, Farhad.

Today's guest, Clarissa Silva developed a technique, Your Happiness Hypothesis (c), based on her research and practice that provides evidence-based solutions to address some of the suboptimal relationship challenges that are occurring in today's tech-driven dating world.

Her truth was that relationships have become much more complicated these days. Here's what we covered:

-The dating paradox, how there is so much choice with online dating, swiping, stoping on shining objects and more. -She walked me through some of the modern dating terms of which I was unaware. -How technology intersects with self-esteem and relationship satisfaction (this was fascinating!) and how people create double consciousness! -We got into vanity validation, device dependency and what people want vs what people need. -Why she doesn't believe in self-love and why she believes we should create our own equations and algorithms that deconstruct "the ideal partner list."

If you're someone who's out in the world dating, this will be really useful for you and if you are just curious what it's like out there – you'll learn a ton in this episode. Enjoy!

xo, E

About Clarissa Silva:

Clarissa Silva is a Behavioral Scientist, Researcher, and Relationship Coach with 17 years of experience in mental health, behavioral science, and public health. She is the founder of C Silva Solutions, LLC, a research and consulting firm that provides evidence-based solutions to companies and individuals.

Clarissa developed a technique, Your Happiness Hypothesis (c), based on her research and practice that provides evidence-based solutions to address some of the suboptimal relationship challenges that are occurring in today's tech-driven dating world.

She is the author of a very tongue-in-cheek relationship wellness blog, "YOU'RE JUST A DUMBASS", to help people select and maintain healthy relationships and avoid some of the difficult life lessons that one encounters in suboptimal relationships. Her work focuses on research and data-driven techniques that she developed to help clients with creating relationship wellness in their lives.

Clarissa holds an MSW from the University of Michigan and a BA from Hunter College. She has been featured in the US on: FOX, NBC, HuffPostLive, ABC, CBS, PR Newswire, Google, Vice. Broadly, Stylecaster, Bustle, Elite Daily, Business Insider, Glamour, NY Post, Yahoo!, Moneyish (among the many) and Internationally on: Yahoo Japan, Tabi Labo Japan, Cosmopolitan Italy, Cosmopolitan Netherlands, Vice Germany, Vice Spain, Vice Columbia, MSN Spain, Cosmopolitan UK and ???? ????? (Macedonia).

Today's guest, Amy Ahlers is a two-time author and a total spitfire. Our conversation was super charged and we explored a lot of things that are up in our culture, our lives and the climate of the coaching industry right now.

Her truth was around celebrating the truths and paradoxes of life and embracing both the magical and the messy. That might sound a bit "airy fairy" but it wasn't even close to that.

During this conversation we got into: -White fragility and privilege and the problem with "colorblindness" -HOW we've been unpacking these things in our own lives and businesses -Her core work around the "inner mean girl" and when that shows up -Big fat lies women tell themselves -The antidote to self-bullying -Being a mom to girls and how to navigate obectification -How your social media behavior reflects your values

Have a listen (probably more than once), share and enjoy this one!

About Amy Ahlers:

Amy Ahlers, the Wake-Up Call Coach, is a bestselling author, keynote speaker and master life coach with nearly two decades of experience. She's the author of two bestselling books, Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves (New World Library, 2011) and Reform Your Inner Mean Girl: 7 Steps to Stop Bullying Yourself & Start Loving Yourself (Beyond Words/Atria/Simon & Schuster, 2015). Amy is on a mission to stop ambitious women from being so darn hard on themselves so they can rise, shine and lead.

After a successful sales-executive career, Amy became a Certified Life Coach over 17 years ago. She is host of the celebrated Amy Ahlers Show podcast, creator of transformational programs such as Inner Mean Girl Reform School with Christine Arylo, Find Your Calling with Martha Beck and Lissa Rankin, Magical Manifestation Method with SARK and Dr. John Waddell & Lift-Off Business Academy

Amy's been featured on stages at places like Google, Wisdom 2.0 and Oracle, has appeared on countless TV and radio shows and leads retreats for women around the world so they cultivate the courage to follow their Inner Wisdom.

Amy is also passionate about empowering high-achieving women, moms, and rising visionaries to build their business, marketing and leadership skills so they can own their brilliance. Amy's own journey from a small one on one coaching practice to best-seller author and multi-six-figure business owner, has inspired hundreds of thousands of people around the world. Amy loves authentically sharing what she's learned from her triumphs and mistakes so that you can accelerate your own heart-centered business and scale to reach more people than you ever thought possible.

Amy's "no-holds-barred" truth telling approach and irresistible sense of humor will give you confidence that you, too, can experience the fulfillment of reaching your highest potential.

Most mornings you'll find Amy doing a dance party with her husband and two daughters with a pile of dirty dishes in the sink. She resides in the San Francisco Bay Area with her family and rescue mutt, Batman.