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Embrace the Feels
When teams run into conflict, either among themselves or with other teams or clients, the standard advice is to look at the content, to look at who said what or who did not do what he should have done … and leave everything else to the team members. This everything else, sadly, includes the emotional content of the conflict.
This is especially prevalent in executive teams, the assumptions being that (a) emotions don't belong in the workplace, which quite obviously does not make any sense, (b) the wild assumption that everyone is an adult and can take care of him- or herself, and (c) that we ain’t got no time for that.
These assumptions have developed in many companies and are as deeply ingrained as they are utterly absurd because they remove from the team the very fabric that it is made of: human beings.
The good news is that not a single executive that I have been working with has dropped dead from connecting with himself and expressing emotions, and neither has anyone ever been ridiculed or shunned.
The elephant in the room is emotional, and everyone involved in the conflict must – MUST – get a clear view of it in order to sustainably solve the situation and emerge with learnings that shape a more productive and humane future for the team.
So, make the elephant visible, just for one hour set aside the content of the conflict and help your people focus on their emotions. Don't forget to open up yourself as well. Just listening is a good start. Refer to the article linked below for more information and hands-on advice.
https://maulco.com/en/opinions/resolve-team-conflicts/
[Ad] Emotionally empowered teams relieve executives and HR departments of work that does not belong on their tables. Let me help you guide your teams towards being able to handle conflicts on their own – among themselves, with other teams, or with clients. This service is an integral part of my Empathetic Organisational Development programme, but can be booked à la carte as a series of workshops and one-on-one coaching sessions. Please get in touch with me for details.
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By Mathias MaulWhen teams run into conflict, either among themselves or with other teams or clients, the standard advice is to look at the content, to look at who said what or who did not do what he should have done … and leave everything else to the team members. This everything else, sadly, includes the emotional content of the conflict.
This is especially prevalent in executive teams, the assumptions being that (a) emotions don't belong in the workplace, which quite obviously does not make any sense, (b) the wild assumption that everyone is an adult and can take care of him- or herself, and (c) that we ain’t got no time for that.
These assumptions have developed in many companies and are as deeply ingrained as they are utterly absurd because they remove from the team the very fabric that it is made of: human beings.
The good news is that not a single executive that I have been working with has dropped dead from connecting with himself and expressing emotions, and neither has anyone ever been ridiculed or shunned.
The elephant in the room is emotional, and everyone involved in the conflict must – MUST – get a clear view of it in order to sustainably solve the situation and emerge with learnings that shape a more productive and humane future for the team.
So, make the elephant visible, just for one hour set aside the content of the conflict and help your people focus on their emotions. Don't forget to open up yourself as well. Just listening is a good start. Refer to the article linked below for more information and hands-on advice.
https://maulco.com/en/opinions/resolve-team-conflicts/
[Ad] Emotionally empowered teams relieve executives and HR departments of work that does not belong on their tables. Let me help you guide your teams towards being able to handle conflicts on their own – among themselves, with other teams, or with clients. This service is an integral part of my Empathetic Organisational Development programme, but can be booked à la carte as a series of workshops and one-on-one coaching sessions. Please get in touch with me for details.