Some of you are single and have never given it a second thought. Others of you wonder about it every waking moment and continually ask why God, why? You are the ones I am writing to today – and hopefully encouraging.

I wrote a post back in February 2017 specifically to encourage singles who want to get married. I wrote this week’s post to encourage both those of you who want to get married or stay single.

Perception

I found it incredibly encouraging to realize that I could make my life as a single better by simply changing how I viewed it.

There is a reason the ThriveSingles.com home page and every podcast episode begins with the words stop hating being single and learn to thrive.  There is a reason you hear it said so often that your perception is your reality. Your attitude toward your singleness helps shape the reality of your life as a single person.

Good News

This is great news. This means your happiness and your satisfaction with life are not dependent on you changing your situation. It means your well-being does not depend on whether you get married or not or whether you have a date this weekend or not.

And, here is more good news, you have the freedom and the ability to view your singleness differently. You can change the way look at and feel about your singleness. The one thing you always have control over is your attitude. Not only that, but it is one thing you alone have control over. No one else can control your attitude unless you allow them to.

Your Point of View

Pop quiz. How do you view your singleness? Do you see it as a cross to bear? A punishment from God? Something to endure until you get married? A failure?

Or, can you see it as something to make the best of – or even an opportunity?

Possibilities

I listen to a few self-help podcasts. I find them encouraging and helpful. They help me develop and maintain a better attitude and give me good tips on living well. A few months back, a self-help “guru” I follow asked a very important question. When something changed in his situation for the worse he asked, “What does this make possible?”

What Does Your Singleness Make Possible?

So, let me ask you this, what does your singleness make possible?

I can see some the more sarcastic among you making your lists:

* Sleeping alone

* Getting even less help around the house

* Getting a second job to make up for the lost second income

* Not having sex for the foreseeable future

I get that. I’ve been there. Being single again or single longer than you had planned does have its downsides – no question.

But seriously, what good things does your singleness make possible?

* A fresh start with somebody more compatible, more loving, more faithful

* A fresh start with someone less demanding, less angry, less expensive

* Pursuing a hobby or business opportunity

* Getting involved with a ministry or civic organization

* Living life unencumbered by the demands and expectations of an unreasonable spouse

For me, yes, I had to sleep alone for years and yes, I had to do all the house cleaning, clothes washing, and cooking, but there was an upside too. Somehow it still allowed me more time for an expanded role in music ministry, an opportunity for singles ministry, and more opportunity to explore my creative side.

Maybe your singleness does not give you extra time or any other obvious advantage. But, if you stay positive and keep your eyes open for new possibilities you will find opportunities.

Is there something you want to accomplish before you get married? Something you want to do or create? Something you want to learn about or explore? What does your singleness make possible?