73. Enforcing Boundaries with a "Narcissist"

Can you have boundaries with your narcissitic ex??? The million dollar question, right?? The answer is that boudaries live within YOU. You don't need someone else's cooperation or approval- you just need to enforce the boundaries you set (which is the hard part) So today we are chatting with Katherine McNichol, a Ontario based therapist who's here to teach us about setting and enforcing boundaries.  You might know Katherine from her hilarious IG account (http://www.instagram.com/katherinemcnichol.com) ! If you haven't checked out her account yet- GO! Her memes are so damn funny.    So what's the process for setting boundaries with a narc?? 1) Set the boundary by telling them "This conversation is to discuss _______________" 2) When they attempt to change the subject (even if it's by throwing a jab at your expense) you can say, "I hear the you want to discuss ________________ and we can do that at another time, but right now we are talking about ___________. 3) Set the boundary. "This conversation is to talk about ______________. If you keep bringing up ___________,I'm going to need to end this conversation." 4) When that boundary that you just set is crossed- END THE CONVERSATION.   The boundary does not exisit unless you enforce it. If you're interested with working with Katherine, please visit: http://www.kiruwellness.com and remember to check out her IG page for daily tips!!    And now, a word from our sponsor: If you are in need of coparenting support you NEED to check out Our Family Wizard. They are here to make even the most high conflict situations a lot easier. Visit them at: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com   And remember, we have private communites for you to join! If you need to listen to our episodes privately, please check out: http://www.patreon.com/hownottosuckatdivorce.com and don't forget about our private FB community! http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity