Palliative care does not equal dying. With 25 years as a palliative care physician, Dr. Michael Barbato has spent a lot of time helping people understand that palliative care can actually improve the quality of life. The focus is on providing relief of pain and stress caused by serious illness.

Being in this specialty area, Dr. Barbato has spent countless hours at the bedside of the dying. And what he has seen and learned from them fascinates him. And has taught him empathy and compassion.

He and his wife, Ann, teach others how to be at the bedside of the dying. Through their midwifing death course, they teach healthcare professionals and laypeople how to care for both the living and the dying. By helping them acknowledge their own beliefs and fears, they can then sit with the dying without judgement, and be present.

Michael believes that end of life visions and dreams can be healing messages not only to the dying, but family members as well. He and Ann teach others how to be present with quality; treating death as a natural phenomenon. And helping providers learn to ask non-clinical questions, to help the dying and their families through the process.

Find out more about their work and where to find his books at Midwifing Death

Or email him directly @ [email protected]

Caregiving.comprovides support for family caregivers. It's a form of self-care that is readily accessible. Denise says self care looks different with you're in the throes of caring for a family member. And stress makes it hard to get the help you need. She believes the best day to look for support is on your best day.

Check out Caregiving.comtoday. Their services are diverse and you can pick and choose what you need. Some of the services they offer:

• Certified Caregiver Consultants
• An Annual Caregiver Conference
• Their Happiness Project
• Caregifters
• Chat

Find them on Social Media too

Twitter

Facebook

Find Denise on LinkedIn

It takes courage to give up your six figure career and hit the road in an RV. And that's exactly what Kimberly has done. She is on a mission to empower people to talk about death and end of life wishes. Through her death positive movement, she is learning that she is living well in the process.

Kimberly shares her personal story of loss, which was a reason for this leap of faith. She wrote a book called Bridging the Gap:Life Lessons of The Dying  and has taken to the road to promote what she has learned.

Find out where you can see her as she travels the country in her RV with her German Shepherd, Raven. Check out the Live Well Die Well Tour   and find out where you can see Kimberly on the road. And check out her podcast Death by Design  and her TedX Talk

You can follow her on Linked Inand Twitter as Kimberly C. Paul and on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTubeas Live Well Die Well Tour

Their engagement rate is 60-70% of clients they do outreach calls to. They have supported over 100,000 clients and their families and healthcare providers by enabling patients to make informed choices, based on their wishes for themselves.

This program is available through insurance companies. How do you find out if you have access to their program?

• call your insurance company and ask if they are working with Vital Decisions
• If not, ask what services they have available to help with advanced care planning
• Call Vital Decisions directly at 1-800-301-3984

Dr. Ducaine is also doing research regarding how healthcare professionals who work with patients approaching the end of life are supported, and how this impacts burnout and sustainability.

What she has found is not rocket science. Providers who take care of themselves (and/or are well supported at work), suffer less burnout and can do the work longer than those who don't.

This goes for family caregivers too. It is important to proactively create an environment which puts you in a good place, so you can be the best caregiver you can be.

2018 has been a whirlwind. I committed to putting out a weekly podcast since I launched in early March and I did it! Well, at least until now. I have had some incredible guests share their experiences as caregivers. All as a way to help you. Let's review the amazing resources available to you as a result of their willingness to share. And I will be back in January 2019 with more new episodes and valuable resources. Happy Holidays!

Judith was living and working on the West Coast when her parents' health declined, requiring her to return to Florida to be able to assist with their care. As a result of her family caregiver experience, she wrote a handbook which offers invaluable information to other family caregivers that she learned the hard way.

The Dutiful Daughter's Guide to Caregiving: A Practical Memoir 

In her book, Judith shares invaluable information which reinforces the need to ask questions like:

• How long will my Mom/Dad be in the hospital?
• Are they admitted or under observation status?

And to consider the "real cost of caregiving", because it very often affects YOU!! There are 65 million family caregivers and 60% of them (mostly women) are working outside the home, while providing care. It is SO important to understand the complexities of this.

You can find out more by listening to this episode and checking out Judith at:

judithdhenry.com

and her Facebook page @judithhenrywriter

This (image in show notes) was hanging in the elevator at the assisted living facility my Mom spent the last 2 years of her life in. I thought it was appropriate for today's post. When your parent's are no longer alive, the holidays are different. But I'm grateful. They both instilled in me a love of family and time spent together during the holidays.

Today's episode is a gentle nudge (well, maybe an in your face nudge), to start the conversation with your parents this weekend. I share some statistics that reflect that fact that people want to talk about end of life wishes, but it isn't happening. So someone just needs to start the ball rolling. Why me you ask? Why not you...

Resources to help you:

My Last Soundtrack

Death Over Dinner

The Conversation Project

Please consider a donation to end senior hunger:

Meals On Wheels America

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

With Thanksgiving right around the corner, I wanted to let you know a couple of things. Did you know that ~9 million seniors in the United States struggle with hunger? That's one in six; and that one in 4 live alone? I talk today with Ellie Hollander, the President and CEO of Meals on Wheels America. The organization is doing great things to assist our most vulnerable senior population. But they are struggling to keep up with the need.

There are over 5,000 individual Meals on Wheels programs nationwide. They serve meals to ~2.3 million seniors/year. That's a pretty impressive number. But what it doesn't tell you is that they are serving 16 million fewer meals than in 2005. And that some seniors are "wait listed", meaning they go hungry. Why?

It's all about the money. Ellies shared that

Connie Gropler was an RN with nearly 2 decades of experience, when she became a caregiver for her Dad and a support system to her Mom and the rest of her family. As her Dad began to deteriorate physically, she found herself lacking that support system from the medical community caring for her Dad. She doesn't blame them, rather, she feels that the system is broken. That there are not enough resources to support THEM. And I don't disagree.This is one of the many issues a family caregiver can face.

Another issue is the "hospice talk". It is important to understand that requesting a hospice evaluation doesn't have to mean death is imminent.  The majority of patients are enrolled in  hospice for 7 days or less, but services are available for 6 months, and that can be a rolling figure. Hospice can provide resources to provide comfort and quality for both patient and caregivers,  that can be otherwise extremely difficult to acquire.

Until we makes some changes in the way the medical community  addresses end fo life discussions and care options, we need to become advocates for our loved ones and ourselves. How can you do this when you are faced with becoming a family caregiver?

• Ask for help
• Be proactive--ask about alternatives to treatment options offered (think Palliative careand hospice evaluations)
• Call hospice yourself!
• Be aware that if you use FMLAto take an LOA to care for a loved one, you will need their physicians attestation and signature on these forms for your employer. It's one of those little things that can put you over the edge!

Check out the good work Connie is doing at Nurse Pollinators.com

You'll find her on social media Facebook: @nursepollinators Instagram: #nursepollinators

Nursing is a tough career choice. No doubt. But how much can you expect anyone to do? I talk today with another nurse. Three years into her career. We talk about what it's like to be a nurse. And how nurse burnout can affect YOU.

We also discuss Question one, on the Massachusetts ballot for the November 6, 2018 election. This question proposes a legal mandate for nurse:patient ratios in acute care settings. On the surface, it sounds amazing. Please listen to this podcast to hear a different perspective from two nurses. One early in her career, the other perhaps a little sullied.

Why is this important to you?

• It may impact the care your parent receives
• It may impact the care you will need to provide to your parent
• It may impact you as a patient
• it may impact you as an employee
• It may impact you as a tax payer

I hope you listen. And I would love to hear your take on this. Even if you don't live in Massachusetts. Because it didn't start here, and it likely won't end here, unless it does...