My guest in this episode, Brian Henderson, and I have interesting similarities in our stories. Our journeys began within months of each other, and we both walked our healing pathways in Hong Kong. As a result of our healing, we left professional services (where we worked with companies on high-stakes matters), found our life’s purpose, and now serve other people as they walk their healing pathways.

I love the part of this conversation where we talk about how trauma and abuse can show up in our performance at work, often through what is perceived to be underperformance. Yet, neither the manager nor the employee has any idea. Rarely do we think about healing from our past to improve performance at work.  

And I REALLY love the part where we talk about MEN! I am passionate about the reality that trauma and abuse know no demographic boundaries, including gender. Men are emotional beings who can be hurt in all the same ways that women can be and, therefore, also need to heal if they are living in suffering as an unhealed survivor.

Highlights of this episode

💙Healing is a marathon, not a race.

💛Work can distract us from what needs to be healed in our personal lives.

💙Burnout occurs when stress exceeds the body’s coping ability, and no amount of well-being practice can prevent the effect on the body. Brian talks about having a healthy lifestyle—exercise, meditation, yoga, being in nature—which would typically help offset burnout. Still, he was under so much pressure at work that no amount of his healthy lifestyle was enough to keep him from burnout.

💛Part of evolving is coming to understand that sometimes we are our own worst enemy—what I refer to as the wretched abuser—because we can contribute to our suffering.

💙Trauma and abuse can show up in our professional lives through performance evaluations where we are told, for example, that we don’t have a voice, mumble, are not assertive, or do not have “executive presence.” Healing can help us to improve, but as employees, we may not recognize that our past can impact our performance. Managers rarely have the training to recognize healing work to help improve employee performance.

💛Similarly, we must understand the workplace triggers that make us less-than-effective leaders or leaders without presence and an ability to connect deeply with colleagues.

💙The benefits of support groups specific to the trauma and abuse you have experienced cannot be overstated. There is so much power in connecting with and being understood and accepted by people with shared experiences.

Resources related to this episode

✨MoveMEN! is a support group where men can slow down, relax, drop the tough guy, be kind, support each other and cultivate some wellness wisdom.

✨MoveMEN! on ​IG​

✨Insight Dialogue is partner work with expression and listening to develop deep interpersonal relationships and facilitate healing.

✨Burnout Recovery Support Groups

✨Brian Henderson (he/him) | LinkedIn

Connect with the HEALing Mentor on social media

@bethjoneshealingmentor on FB, IG, LI, TT & YT

Keywords

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