She Finds Joy

Ep 106 | The Motivation Equation: Why We Get Stuck

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Hey Joy Seekers! Welcome to the She Finds Joy Podcast! Today’s episode serves up exactly what you crave: actionable insight, real-life examples, and life/love leadership wisdom from Frederick Buskey! With a rich background, 17 years in K-12 teaching and leadership, international experience, and whole-program redesigns under his belt, Frederick Buskey delivers practical frameworks that make motivation not just understandable but DO-ABLE. If you’ve ever felt stuck, judged yourself harshly for “failing” to change a habit, or wondered why some goals just don’t stick, this episode will flip your whole approach.

 

Ready to rewire motivation in your work, parenting, or health? Hit play, take notes, and get curious because a more compassionate, empowered you STARTS HERE!




In This Episode:


  • Motivation, Demystified:  What IS motivation, really? Frederick Buskey guides us to a clear, actionable definition. Motivation as your willingness and ability to do the thing you want (or need) to do. No more fluffy buzzwords, just a clean way to analyze what’s blocking your goals.

    •  

    • The Three Faces of Motivation 

      •   – Task Face: Will you do the one-off, specific task (like making a healthy dinner tonight)?  

        – Skill Face: Can you implement something new you’ve learned (like a new teaching practice or recipe)?  

        – Behavior Face: The toughest will you sustain the change and embed a new behavior into your life? (Frederick Buskey says this is where most of us trip up!)

       

      • The Motivation Equation:  Motivation = Value ÷ Effort  (How much do you value the outcome, and how hard does it feel right now?)

        •  

        • Make It Work for You:  Use the equation to figure out WHY you or someone else are stuck. Are you overestimating effort? Underestimating immediate value? Or caught by competing values (hello, ‘supermom’ guilt vs. self-care!)? This approach swaps JUDGMENT for CURIOSITY, setting you up for progress, not shame-dumping. 

          •  

          • Why Context Matters: Your motivation is unique not a character flaw! Frederick Buskey discusses how social context, personal narratives (“I should take care of everyone else first”), and even biology (hello, brains addicted to instant feedback!) all shape what works.



            • Power Moves:

             

            • Trade Judgment for Curiosity: Instead of berating yourself for missing the gym, ask: “Where’s the friction? How can I lower it?”
            • Engineer Your Environment: Remove temptations, add easy cues. (Put the phone in another room! Prep the meals on Sunday! Pack your backpack in advance! 
            • Gamify Your Day: Like Frederick Buskey, set a winnable bar ten minutes of yoga, or just drive to the gym. Tiny wins build momentum! 
            • Get Clear on Priorities: Every yes is a no to something else. Distinguish between urgent tasks and lasting priorities (especially for school leaders and busy parents!).



              • Mic-Drop Quotes:

               

              • “We put a lot of judgment when we don’t do the thing. The motivation equation helps us stop judging and get curious.” 
                • “A little bit of success builds momentum. Set the bar low, win, and it will grow from there.”
                  • “If I don’t buy the Froot Loops in the store, I only have to say no once. But if I bring them home, I have to say no every day.”
                    • “Judgment leads to conflict. Curiosity leads to collaboration.” 



                      • Listener Challenge:

                       

                      👉 Pick one area (health, family, work) and ask yourself:  

                      • What’s more valuable to me than this old habit?  
                      • Where can I reduce friction to make the right choice easier?  

                        • 👉 Take one “tiny win” action THIS WEEK can you meal-prep, put your phone out of sight at night, or pre-pack for tomorrow’s workout?



                        Share & Connect:

                         

                        Screenshot your favorite takeaway, tag @KimStrobelJoy, and let us know how you’re lowering friction or trading judgment for curiosity! 


                        Hungry for more from Frederick Buskey?  

                        • Grab his book, A School Leader’s Guide to Reclaiming Purpose: 
                        • Sign up for his powerful daily leadership email
                        • Listen to The Assistant Principal Podcast:

                          •  

                          Drop a review, pass this gem to a friend, and remember: Change starts with curiosity, not self-criticism. Let’s engineer our joy and motivation, one empowered choice at a time!

                           

                          With inspiration & ease,  

                          Kim

                           

                          Hit play, take action, and spark change. Motivation is truly yours for the making.



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                          She Finds JoyBy Kim Strobel
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