Married and Connected

Ep 118: The Mother Wound: How It Shapes Us, Haunts Our Marriage and How To Start Healing


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Have you ever felt like something unseen is quietly sabotaging your relationships — a fear, a barrier, a wound you can’t quite name? That’s often the mother wound: the emotional imprint left by how we were mothered (or not), which later influences how we love, trust, and connect.

In this episode of Married & Connected, I (Kameran Alareqi) walk you through:

  • What exactly the mother wound is, and how early caregiving becomes the blueprint for adult relationships

  • How it shows up differently in men and women, and how those patterns sneak into marriages

  • Ways it damages intimacy: shame, withdrawal, role confusion, and intergenerational transmission

  • How attachment styles (secure, anxious, avoidant) are linked to mother‐wound dynamics

  • Practical strategies you can begin applying today — if your wound is moderate — to create new relational patterns

  • A parenting lens: as a mother, how you can mitigate or interrupt passing down the mother wound to your children

This episode is both compassionate and courageous. It’s for you if you want to see your blind spots, begin healing relational injury, and rewire how love feels in your marriage.

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✅ Hear This If You’ve Ever Thought

  • “Why do I freeze when he criticizes me?”

  • “I either take over or disappear — how do I stop?”

  • “I don’t want to pass hurt to my kids — how do I mother better this time?”

  • “We fight about the same things, over and over — did my childhood start it?”

🛡 Legal DisclaimerThis podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional counseling, therapy, or medical advice. Every person’s history is unique — use what resonates and leave what doesn’t. Neither I nor my company are responsible for any outcomes from what you apply here. If you need personalized or deep therapeutic work, consider consulting a qualified professional.


  • 📚 Resources & Recommended ReadingDr. Andrea Vitz — expert in mother wound, attachment, and relational healing
  • Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) literature

  • Attachment theory meta-analyses (for further reading)

  • 📞 Coaching & Support (Kameran Alareqi)If you want help walking this out in your life, I work with couples and individuals to heal relational wounds, rebuild emotional safety, and strengthen marriage bonds.

    • Email: [email protected]

    • Website & coaching details: www.recognizingpotential.com

    • Instagram and TikTok: @married.and.connected

    🔑 SEO Keywords & Phrasesmother wound in marriage, what is mother wound, how mother wound affects relationships, mother wound therapy, mother wound for men, mother wound for women, repairing mother wound, attachment & mother wound, preventing mother wound in children, healing relational wounds

    🙏 Final ThoughtYou carry more than what you see — but you are not defined by the quiet wounds of the past. The fact you’re here, listening, means your heart wants repair. Healing doesn’t have to be perfect or fast — it just needs consistency, curiosity, and courage. Thank you for giving yourself the chance to begin.

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    Married and ConnectedBy Kameran Al-Areqi

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