Like Roberto Esquivel Cabrera's American Girl Doll-sized penis, which is actually mostly foreskin, this episode of Going Terribly is mostly It Went Terribly. Let us regale you with tales of how Alice's second favorite band disappointed her and how giant penises have disappointed us all.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Law & Order butt plates

- A breakdown of favorite time traveling movies and how Queen Elizabeth II was alive during them all

- How Miss Piggy became the world's most famous side of bacon

- A great wrist injury story, which surprisingly has nothing to do with Mr. Cabrera

- From Chocolates to Sex Toys: A Choose Your Own Advent-ure Calendar