In this episode of Relational Lives, Ali and Ros explore the complexities of the fearful avoidant attachment style and how it affects our relationships, communication, and self-perception. If you've ever felt stuck in a push-pull dynamic, terrified of being hurt but also craving intimacy, this episode will help you make sense of what's going on.

We break down what causes this attachment style, what it looks like in practice, and how people can begin to heal. Whether you relate personally or are trying to understand a partner, parent, or friend with this pattern, this conversation is packed with insight and empathy. We explore how fearful avoidant attachment develops, how it shows up in adult relationships, and why people with this pattern often feel confused, ashamed, or stuck in love.

Show notes:

Episode: What is a Fearful Avoidant Attachment Style?

In this episode:

00:00 – Welcome & why this topic matters

Resources mentioned:

📕 Attached by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller

📕 The Polyvagal Theory by Stephen Porges (for understanding nervous system regulation)

Previous episodes on:

Attachment Styles:

Building Healthy Relationships:

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Disclaimer:

Credits:  

Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk

Music by: Stile Tree Audio