Could you imagine if today were Julia Roberts's birthday?! It's not, but could you just IMAGINE?!?!

Elsewhere in this week's episode, Doug and Alice just got back from St. Louis (and TO the future!), and now they're ready to find some fowl balls or other unusual body parts to devour at the West Side Nut (heh) Club Fall Festival.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Keep ketchup off your hot dogs

- What do you do once you've tried every flavor of every brand of sparkling water? Is it just over now?

- Near universal praise for Costco...except for a troubling recent move in their chicken packaging

- Jame Doody Dench

- Revisiting the time certain adult toys may have been lost in a matter of national security