Yeah, sure, your pet is your best friend because and they provide you with unrequited love and companionship, yada yada yada. But your dog would be waaay cooler if it could breathe fire. Hypothetical situations like this are what we here at Debate This! do best. And so, we’re taking some of Mario’s most iconic baddies and housebreaking them. Oh no, Chargin’ Chuck peed on the carpet again…

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