In this fast-paced episode, Alice and Doug go *bang zoom* straight to the moon and back with musings on Hogwarts houses, reality dating shows, and sex work destigmatization. Doug also creates some predictive text fortune cookies (in bed), and Alice intricately details the obscure, niche world of international collegiate muggle quidditch.

Honestly, are any of those words even real?

Other discussion topics may include:

- Pink panthers, chocolate frogs, and Twix kittens

- Sexy Beasts and Where to Find Them, by JK Rawring

- Rob Thomas and also the other Rob Thomas

- The sexy adventures of Remington Rock and Dick Crocker

- Conjoined Toilets and Rotisserie Chicken: A Going Terribly Guide to Romance