Anxiety... Stress... And the tension that comes with it...  Compounded with years of practice... You may not realize it, but thanks to the human ability to normalize damn near anything, we can get used to "hyperdrive," where even our most relaxed moment today far exceeds your most exasperated moment from childhood.  Like layer upon layer of clothing, the mere thought of authentically ((relaxing)) could be like stripping all those layers of armor, pretense, and reaction to reveal the softy underneath it all... naked... and insecure.  Now who in their right mind would want to REALLY ((Relax))?!   This isn't  a day at the spa kind of "relax"... this is the cut the s*&# and ((Face the Music)) kind of ((Relax)).