What’s Actually the Bare Minimum in Dating?

Everyone talks about the bare minimum in dating—but very few people agree on what it actually is.

In this episode of The Cognac Room, we unpack one of the most debated questions in modern dating: what truly counts as effort, especially in the early stages of getting to know someone.

We explore how expectations around dating have shifted, why people often walk into early encounters with completely different definitions of effort, and how misunderstandings around “doing enough” create frustration, resentment, and missed connections.

As the episode unfolds, we challenge some commonly accepted ideas about what effort looks like—and question whether certain dating behaviors are actually meaningful or just convenient stand-ins for connection.

This isn’t about lowering standards.

It’s about clarifying them.

If you’ve ever left a date unsure whether someone really tried—or wondered if you were expecting too much or not enough—this episode is for you.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp

Cognac Room listeners get 10% off of your first month at https://www.betterhelp.com/cognacroom