I do not believe that I need to forgive anyone who has hurt, abused, disrected and harmed me in any way.  I sometimes think that forgiveness is used as a cop out - for example, trying to get victims to look the other way, like religious leaders who have asked victims to talk about what happened and then to forgive their attacker.  Victims have been encouraged over and over to "let it go", "god wants you to forgive".  Call me selfish, immature, ungodly, call me whatever you need to call me to help yourself digest the boldness of my viewpoint. It will not change how I feel about forgiveness.  I do not totally disagree with how powerful forgiveness can be, for certain situations, but for victims who have been traumatized, and their experiences minimized and shoved in some mental box for storage under the title "I forgive them" is a cop out to me.  Victims need to be witnessed and heard and they need justice.  

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