We need to consider the possibility that, in 2016, a Scientology spy started seeing a therapist in order to lure me into visiting the same office so that they could feed falsely incriminating smear campaigns about me to their therapist and enlist other people in the performing arts to do so in exchange for career incentive.

This idea and my whole life is copyrighted and you will pay me to write this for Netflix, Hulu, and HBO.