Fair Game Theory

Sometimes my multi-interest black ops takes the form of fiasco that comes from no other source than commonplace mediocrity and a series of mildly ill gotten circumstance, but I know that there is a highly paid operative sitting in front of a computer screen somewhere, patently crafting my downfall. Here’s a tale of a sneaker sole, a blood donation, a an exercise routine, a shopping trip gone-not terribly wrong, or even slightly wrong-just a bit sour enough to place me in a resting state of discomfort and disadvantage. And probably to trick me into having to share some deeply personal information in order to convey the intention of this specific anecdote.

This episode includes a bonus feature possible false memory at the beginning.

I never thought I’d be here describing a possible Robin Williams lookalike operative hired to stalk me to a Hungarian bakery circa 2019, but here we are.

Are gang initiates staging domestic abuse mental breakdowns on the subway in hopes of assassinating me as an incidental bystander for incentive from Scientology/the Brooks and Kargman families, or ATA?

Here’s the tale of two long term operative friends possibly trying to use subtle suggestion to get me to sink my meager 9 months worth of retirement savings into ill informed Alibaba options, and when that failed, see if they could get me to purchase a handmade $900 umbrella when obviously I should get one for free as an influencer.

“Covert action is a stimulating business, a heady experience for those who sponsor it and for its practitioners. If not used in moderation, it is as dangerous as any stimulant.”

-David Phillips, former CIA Officer

What’s up Y’all School of Drama. I got the above quote from “The Last Honest Man” by James Risen. I highly recommend it to anyone with time to kill while you’re sitting in a parked car near my home, watching me from a live feed hidden camera, and masturbating.

Speaking of heady experiences, I’m pretty sure my coworkers and managers and people getting paid to interact with me in a highly controlled environment have been commissioned in an elaborate scheme to covertly chip away at me using advanced psychological warfare tactics until I am a shell of my former self who appears to have inexplicably just declined after leaving Scientology. This episode is about their possible/probable attempt to Paulette Cooper me into an alcohol dependency.

Also-nobody can use these episodes as inspiration for your Netflix series. You have to come hire me and give me book deals. Happy Pride Bychess!

An examination of ritual and metaphor vs. cognitive dissonance in the context of culture and degrees of indoctrination, and the impact of economics on religiosity. The meek shall be rewarded. Have fun in the next life, dumb*ss!

Hey-if you’re a hacker or specialist with the resources to investigate and prove the extensive psychological warfare demonstrated in Vanity Fair’s “The Golden Suicides”, get in touch.

This is the follow up to episode 116, in which I describe getting stalked by a literary agent, or someone posing as such, after I sent an email query to Bill Clegg for my dark humor memoir, “Almost Rapist”.

Here, I delve back into the James Frey scandal being complicated by the presence of two major Scientology actors in the film version of his disgraced memoir, and even touch upon the potential long range cultural impact of Will Smith’s sequel to Independence Day—Palm Sunday.

Ultimately, this episode, like this whole podcast, is about me getting screwed out of all I deserve while terrible people benefit from a society designed to keep average people from ruining too much and punish greatness.

I honestly wish I was back in the cult so I didn’t have to know all this. Nevertheless, I haven’t called the registrar just yet. I’m not a conspiracy theorist, I’m a conspiracy realist. There’s a real conspiracy against me, I just don’t know how it works exactly.

Do you ever get the feeling that a billion dollar church has put cameras in your home in order to anticipate your next move at the laundromat in order to coordinate spies to interact with you so you’ll form delusions that your response was morally inadequate and so karmically manifested a rejection email from an arts residency in hopes of triggering your public Karen freakout? I knew I wasn’t alone in this. Thank you everyone. After only 121 episodes, this podcast has surpassed 1000 downloads. Consider this your reward.

This is for anyone who’s ever said “Why would I care if anyone spied on me? I have nothing to hide.” I used to say this very thing, in a loud, bragging tone to all my friends. Other than an isolated incident involving a single serving meatloaf from Eli Zabar’s which falls outside the statute of limitations, I have nothing to hide that I won’t eventually exploit for my art—but it turns out, getting spied on can still be terrible for many reasons.