Jen is disgusted with herself and Sharon learns the meaning of "rubbing one out". Big fan, Tim, joins the ladies in a Fan-Fucking-Tastic quiz, and Carol does a Digger Deeping on the history of the merkin. Does Jen have nose cancer? Did it come from dirty balls? Also, a Petito/Laundrie update that proves Carol's powers of deduction and observation. Be sure to check out our show notes and links at momswipesleft.com.