Reaching the autopilot phase of behavior change takes a willingness to put in the work. It’s not easy developing new neural connections within your brain. But once you’ve reached autopilot, there is a physiologic sigh of relief. There remains challenge, but there is a reward here that you may not have felt before. Tune in today as I explain what is possible as you live into this higher version of yourself. I promise, it is something you have never even considered, but I’ll explain how to make it possible.

Welcome to Your Living Health, the podcast where we talk about real life strategies to reduce chronic inflammation. Each episode will uncover tools for you to lose weight and achieve optimal health. I’m your host, Carly Lucchesi, I’m a UC Davis trained registered dietitian and I’m also a life coach. Together let’s coach through the science of inflammation, but in a way that is simple, purposeful and fun.

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Hey there! Welcome back! Today we continue with the finale of our four part series about the actual stages of behavior change. Over the past 3 weeks we have deeply looked into the challenges of deciding to change, early stages of doing new things, and common tricks your brain uses to keep pulling you back into your old ways. Each of these phases has their own unique challenges, but with each phase there are tools to strategically overcome each obstacle. If you haven’t yet listened to the previous three episodes, I recommend that you come back to this episode once you have. Because autopilot can only be achieved once you’ve endured the growing pains of behavior change. But today we get to dig into exactly what to expect during autopilot. This phase is not void of it’s challenges (of course), but today we get to talk more about the rewards versus the struggles. This episode is to paint a picture of what autopilot should and can be like, but only once you’ve been diligent to take back authority over your brain.

So, I first want to talk about the inevitable discomfort of autopilot. Remember, the fact remains that even in autopilot life remains 50/50. It will still be uncomfortable half of the time, regardless of these new behaviors you have, the results you’ve achieved, or what your body now looks like. This discomfort will live both in the space of your emotions, AND your actions. But nothing has gone wrong, this is just part of the journey of being human.

The first discomfort is always being stuck with your toddler brain. There is never enough mental authority to silence the desires of the primal brain. And remember, your primal brain only wants three things: comfort all of the time, the avoidance of any pain or discomfort, and to be efficient with energy expenditure. Your brain will forever just want you to stay home, eat delicious snacks, and watch a good movie. Period. And your brain does this in an effort to keep you safe, because nothing is going to hurt you when you’re safe at home watching TV and eating snacks, right? This is complete toddler logic, because with our adult brains we also know how incredibly small and unrewarding this life would be. Sure you’re safe, but you’re also stuck. You’re not living into the person you can be, giving back to the world in the unique way you are able to. So just remember, when you’ve made an intentional change to your behavior, and you’ve reached autopilot, your primal brain still will be humming in the background wanting the same three things. There is no escape. So even in autopilot, you will have thoughts that sound like “this should be easier” “life was better before” “I can’t live like this” “why is this so hard? For others it’s so much easier”. These thoughts are just toddler logic, and we all know toddlers make no sense a majority of the time. These thoughts will just be in the background, and the more you allow them to passively be there, the quieter they will become. But just remember, they will never go away. And that’s 100% normal. And it’s 100% ok. Nothing has gone wrong. You’re just a human.

The second uncomfortable thing you will have to endure in autopilot is that you will have to continue doing the actions that got you there in the first place. With weight loss, what this will look like is having to eat the same things that you had to eat as you were losing the weight. Autopilot is not the point where you get to finally eat the things you want because you’ve arrived at the destination. No, you get to eat the same things as before, exercise the same amount as before, do thought work as much as before, etc. I think it’s kinda funny, but really, the actions of autopilot look NO DIFFERENT than the actions of phases 2 and 3. And if you want to remain with these new results, you’ve gotta continue with the same actions. For some of you this might be the worst news ever, but hopefully for most of you I’m just confirming the suspicion you’ve had all along. That even autopilot takes work, but that’s ok. This discomfort of work is far superior to the discomfort of inflammation and chronic disease, right?

But now let’s get to the good stuff. I want to explain the benefits of autopilot in a way that you’ve never heard or potentially never even experienced before. There is a freedom and comfort within this phase that is impossible anywhere else, and it’s where you truly get to live into a higher version of yourself. There are two rewards of this phase I want to show you, and I promise the second reward is what will keep you grounded in autopilot.

Let’s start with the reward of being able to fall back into behaviors you’ve learned during phase 2 and 3. What this will feel like is beginning to have you back as a default. You have done the intentional and uncomfortable work to develop these new neural network connections that leads to new TFA cycles feeling normal and natural. These Thought-Feeling-Action cycles were once foreign, and once felt very uncomfortable and un-natural. It took intentional and planned bridge TFA cycles to even begin believing some of these new thoughts. But you have put in the work, and now the reward of that work is your brain having this new pathway in place so that it feels natural and normal to think, feel and act in this new way. This new TFA cycle will feel so natural that it will transition into your zone of comfort. And the more you think these new thoughts, the more you will believe them, and the more factual this new reality will become. It will look like you just simply knowing that you are a person who loves having dried fruit for dessert, and you will be able to cheerfully look forward to this action instead of the intentional redirection away from the cookie. You will as a default grab the handful of dried fruit, and savor each bite knowing that it is actually what you want, not what you have to have because you’re on a diet.

And now, this example beautifully leads into the sweetest reward of autopilot, FREEDOM. There is freedom in autopilot because there is finally choice. In phase 1-3, there was continuous redirection back to a new behavior. You are in the trenches making new neural connections, choosing what to think on purpose, and likely choosing to take actions that feel difficult and restrictive. Once you’ve reached autopilot, you finally have the freedom to make whatever choice you want. And sometimes that choice might look like choosing an old behavior, sometimes you might choose the cookie over the dried fruit. But when you’re in autopilot, you’ve done the work, and you are no longer victim to the false desires of sugar filled sweets and the giving in to indulgence. You are no longer trapped by the siren call of the unintentional TFA cycles created by your toddler brain. You have stepped into awareness, and can fall back onto these new neural connections you’ve established showing you that dried fruit for dessert is actually on an equal platform compared to cookies. One is not better than the other, they are just unique. You get to choose, freely. Sometimes you’re going to choose the cookie, just simply because you love cookies. You are going to come into this decision knowing that you are going to want more than one, that it is going to potentially cause symptoms, and that it might make those toddler thoughts a little louder temporarily. But that’s ok, because you just want to enjoy a cookie. And other days you are going to choose dried fruit, just simply because you prefer the dried fruit. You love the taste, and maybe even more you love the way the dried fruit makes you feel. You don’t have excessive cravings for more, you don’t have any symptoms, you just get to enjoy a sweet for the simple pleasure of sweets. You get to choose, knowing 100% that you can have whatever dessert you want on any given day because you are a grown up. You are free to do whatever the heck you want. And often it looks like you choosing to have your back and live in alignment with the future you want to have instead of the instant gratification promised by a cookie.

But there’s more than just freedom. This next reward is the most valuable and most difficult space to enter in autopilot. Once you’ve reached this point, I promise you there is absolutely no way you’ll ever slide backwards again. When you have the freedom to choose the cookie or the dried fruit, you’ve finally arrived in true autopilot when neither decision impacts your relationship with yourself because you love you regardless. If you have the cookie, you love yourself for that decision. You love that you get to enter into the experience of having that cookie, truly savoring and loving every single bite. You love that future you has your back, and loves you as she goes through whatever weight was gained or symptoms developed from that cookie. Future you agrees that that cookie was freaking amazing, and that the experience of it was so worth it. You continue to love you, no matter what decision you choose to make. You love you when you choose the dried fruit, because you love that you chose to take care of your body over indulging in your taste buds. BUT, you equally love and support you when you choose to indulge in your taste buds over taking care of your body. Autopilot is reached when love can be equally felt to matter what you choose. You refuse to beat yourself up, no matter how you feel, or how many cookies you accidentally indulged in. You see these actions as neutral, and you choose to think thoughts that keep rooted in the protection of love. From true love, you get to choose with true freedom.

What I have found is when you’re rooted in this space, you are no longer seeking comfort because you are the one creating comfort. You are creating this bubble of love and protection for yourself that not even the comfort of a cookie can penetrate. You are no longer choosing the cookie for this false sense of comfort and reward, you are just eating the cookie because you like cookies. And then you’re eating dried fruit because you like dried fruit. You refuse to make any of these decisions mean anything about you as a person, because you love you no matter what you choose on any given day. This means you can never “fall off the wagon”, because there is never a wagon to fall off of. There is just the destination of longevity, and the path you choose to get there. Some days that path may look a little rough, but when your actions remain rooted in pure love it doesn’t matter the path you take. Your actions will always 100% of the time, lead you to the destination of longevity.

If you are feeling stuck, or frustrated that you’ve never been able to reach the reward of autopilot, I ask you to head over to yourlivinghealth.com and book a call with me. Let’s chat about where you’re getting stuck, and what YOU can do to begin moving forward. YOU have the ability to permanently lose weight AND finally take authority over your chronic inflammation. Thank you for your interest in learning how to do that, and your willingness to do the work required. I’ll talk to you next week, bye!