6 Most important mindsets that will make you magnetic

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, your values become your destiny.” Gandhi

 

 

These mindsets will help you become a more charismatic person.

 

No matter what, I will be okay

The most fundamental mindset to Charisma

So many people live their life wrapped in a mental loop of ‘what if questions’

What if I speak up and my boss doesn’t like my idea?

What if I ask her on a date and she says no?

All of these what if questions stop people from expressing who they truly are!!!

We must defeat these ‘what if’ questions, and realize that everything will always be okay.

The repercussions for worst case scenarios are not so bad!

If your boss doesn’t like the idea, move on.Bravery to put your idea into the world

Your idea could change the world

This skill comes from knowing: No matter what I will be okay.

Enables you to act with freedom that most people never experience.Everyone else is too stuck in the loop of fear and rejection

You can and should take risks in expressing yourselfIdeas

how you feel

asking people

cracking jokes

speaking your mind

Others will see that you are immune to social pressure and that you express who you are.

They will gravitate toward you, because that is a strength that most people want to have themselves.

If you ever find yourself stuck, not knowing if you should speak up, come back to this belief because it is so critical.

 

 

I care more about my character than my reputation

 

Character is more important than how people perceive you

You realize that the way that you are matters more than the way that people think that you are

So many people spend their lives managing the opinions of other people

‘Will they think this, if I do that’ ‘Even if I say the truth they still won’t believe me’

If you focus on doing the right thing:worrying about your own character,

and then letting people form opinions about you,

what happens is that people see that you are not overly invested in controlling how they feel

‘Wait a sec. if they don’t care about how I feel, I can trust them to be genuine and honest

It’s paradoxical

SO, if you focus on your character and stop investing so much effort into controlling peoples opinions, what tends to happen is that you feel freedom to be who you are

People will also have better opinions of you once you act this way

 

BTW we are always here for you guys for honest opinions

 

You have impeccable honesty and integrity

 

This is the one that is least emphasized and needs to be talked about much more

Every time you tell a lie, even a small lie,‘I’m on my way’ but you are still showering

You are building a reputation with yourself

Your reputation with yourself is that you sometimes say things that aren’t true

Even if no one else finds out, you still know this

This devastates your ability to speak with conviction, which is critical to charisma

The ability to look someone in the eye and say that you believe 100% what is coming out of your mouth. You fully stand behind what you say

When you lie sometimes, you hurt your ability to speak with conviction all the time.

It may come through in little gestures, a flinch, eye contact, a waver of voice, etc. The lie will break through

Cut that shit out today.

There will be a penalty to pay

If you have started building a life that is created of small lies built over time, walking back and exposing the truth can hurt.

There are rare situations that you do not need to expose a truth

Someone dying doesn’t need to know that you don’t believe in god.

If you don’t tell the truth you are crushing your self esteem and ability to form genuine relationships in your life

 

You do not need to convince anyone of anything.

 

Not caring vs. persuasion

The idea behind how to be more persuasive: make your asks more persuasive. Increase the odds that someone wants to do the things that you want them to do.

BUT, the idea is not that you repeat that same cycle over and over, badgering them

You never need anyone to do anything, you are simply asking them

Where people run into trouble is when they have relationships in their life where they feel they absolutely need to get someone to work a certain way

Then you enter into neediness aka. Trying to convince

You have gone back and forth over the same issue many times

Your charisma is destroyed because you need something from that person

The charismatic person simply asks, and if the answer is yes: great.

can I deal with this in a way that is acceptable to me

or do I need to weed this person or situation out.

If the answer is no, ask yourself:

This can be very hard.

If someone is not treating you the way you like to be treated, do not engage in this cycle of trying to force them to be different

Accept that the relationship will remain the way it is, or filter them out of your life

Once you start filtering these peripheral relationships, the people who do not push you, people who look at new opportunities with a discouraging eye

When you filter them out, you make room for the type of people who are going to lift you up.

 

Start communicating your purpose more proactively

 

A lot of people spend a lot of their lives engaged in small talk

Wind up with the same answer.Job title, vacation, blah blah

Charasmatic people have a purpose that they are fired up by

They won’t shove it down your throat, but when it comes up in conversation they will tell you what their purpose is

Start telling people your purpose, and before you know it people will help you achieve it.

This incredible thing happens, but only because they repeatedly put it out there

Other humans hear, they are inspired by the message, they are inspired by the desire, then they help

Make sure to put your purpose into the world

 

 

You need to start going first

 

Be the first person to extend praise in a group of people who aren’t comfortable doing that

First person in a group of strangers who cracks a joke

First person to say something vulnerable

You are leading the group in ways that they can connect more. This signifies leadership and bravery to other people.

You are doing what others are nervous to do.

When you do that you will naturally become the type of person that others want to be around

Whole group dynamics can shift. Everyone will get vulnerable, everyone will tell a joke. All of a sudden you are connecting in ways that were not previously possible

Be the person who takes the social risk

No matter what happens, it will be okay

 

 

As you start to incorporate these mindsets into your life, they will start to make a tremendous difference. Build the mindsets with surface level ideas such as body language and eye contact.