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Episode 33: Successful First Date Conversations
In this week’s episode, I give you some great tips on how to have successful first date conversations. I believe that it is most important to find out what your date VALUES rather than what their hobbies and interests are. You want to determine if they are the type of person who would be a good fit for you and the type of relationship you want to have moving forward.
For my female clients, I tell them to assume the role of “employer” and their dates are applicants for the “position” they have open. They should do more listening and should focus more on how their date makes them FEEL. For my male clients, I encourage them to come prepared to exhibit their best qualities and skills. I want everyone to put their best foot forward and make a great first impression. I also want you to be yourself! Have an open mind AND an open heart.
You will need at least three dates to determine if someone is NOT right for you. There are exceptions to this rule; if the person is intoxicated or high, if they are rude to the point of being embarrassing, or if they are violent, angry or abusive in ANY way, then it’s totally ok to walk away and never look back!
I am including a list of questions that can help you to not only get to know what your date values, but it can also help to foster closeness and intimacy between the two of you. This list of questions was compiled by Dr. Arthur Aron as part of his study “The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness: A Procedure and Some Preliminary Findings”. Aron, an expert in the field of interpersonal relationships and love, developed a technique 20 years ago that apparently dramatically improves two people’s chances of falling in love. He had several people who were strangers come together and ask each other these questions over a period of time and also look into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes. These questions created vulnerability and closeness between the couples within one night. Download the questions here and use them on your next date! You can also read more about the study here:
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
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By BetterLoveMovementIn this week’s episode, I give you some great tips on how to have successful first date conversations. I believe that it is most important to find out what your date VALUES rather than what their hobbies and interests are. You want to determine if they are the type of person who would be a good fit for you and the type of relationship you want to have moving forward.
For my female clients, I tell them to assume the role of “employer” and their dates are applicants for the “position” they have open. They should do more listening and should focus more on how their date makes them FEEL. For my male clients, I encourage them to come prepared to exhibit their best qualities and skills. I want everyone to put their best foot forward and make a great first impression. I also want you to be yourself! Have an open mind AND an open heart.
You will need at least three dates to determine if someone is NOT right for you. There are exceptions to this rule; if the person is intoxicated or high, if they are rude to the point of being embarrassing, or if they are violent, angry or abusive in ANY way, then it’s totally ok to walk away and never look back!
I am including a list of questions that can help you to not only get to know what your date values, but it can also help to foster closeness and intimacy between the two of you. This list of questions was compiled by Dr. Arthur Aron as part of his study “The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness: A Procedure and Some Preliminary Findings”. Aron, an expert in the field of interpersonal relationships and love, developed a technique 20 years ago that apparently dramatically improves two people’s chances of falling in love. He had several people who were strangers come together and ask each other these questions over a period of time and also look into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes. These questions created vulnerability and closeness between the couples within one night. Download the questions here and use them on your next date! You can also read more about the study here:
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html