OMG, Mallory’s found a mystery diary and she has a lot of thoughts about it! Stacey’s house might be haunted, or not, whatever, and Buddy Barrett’s learning about the Magic Of Archie Comics. Meanwhile, Karen’s got some bonus content for you all and is real angry at her 12-year-old self.

On today’s agenda: an MBA in embezzling; how long it actually takes to zone out and narrate Chapter 2; how to train your dragon to seize the means of production; who needs bogeymen when you have New Yorkers?; the gigantic Pike hand curse; a school field trip for the ages; building literacy skills via Attack On Titan; urgent updates on Sir Walter Scott; Kristy gets even more problematic than usual; Scholastic cuts their old man character budget; an abundance of Jareds; Charlotte Johansson has unique, profound insights; white male mediocrity saves the day.

Our theme song is "The Incredible Shrinking Larry" by Matt Oakley, and "Big Band Jingle A" is by Lobo Loco, both on the Free Music Archive.

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