The Uncommon Communicator

Episode 4 - Mastering No


Listen Later

Follow us on Instagram: The_Uncommon_Communicator
Find our public group on Facebook: The Uncommon Communicator
But most of all, email us your questions, concerns and recommendations to:
[email protected]
Like, follow and send in your reviews to your favorite Podcast platform

 
The Uncommon communicator is the individual that has the enlightenment to recognize in any situation whether communication has occurred. This uncommon communicator takes ownership of the conversation and possess the skills to navigate and facilitate the conversation to mutual understanding.

Story summary:

She tells Chris that he needs to go volunteer at a Suicide hotline and go away. He does, learns some lessons from that time. In one particularly proud moment, Chris was certain that he had a great conversation, talked the guy down, he was happy with the results. His supervisor thought it was the worst call ever! This is where we learn about the counterfeit YES and the power of NO! Chris did eventually go back and he did end up getting the job. 

The 2 Key things we learn from this chapter:

1.    NO Starts the negotiation

2.    The 3 kinds of Yes’s

3.    An email magic trick

 NO starts the negotiation

·      No is a gateway to yes

  • It allows the giver time to pivot, adjust and re-examine.
  • It allows the person some feeling of control but also some time to think
  •  It actually creates the environment to get to the one YES that matters  

Start with NO

  In Jim Camps book “Start with No” we learn to give our adversary the permission to say no at the very onset. 

  He calls it the right to “Veto” and people will fight to the death for the right to say NO…So give it to them

  This creates a much more constructive and collaborative environment. 

    You have to train yourself to hear no as something other than rejection

 I’m not yet ready to agree

  You are making me uncomfortable

 I do not understand

  I don’t think I can afford it 

  I want something else

  I need more information

 I want/need to talk it over with someone else.

 Ask solution-based questions to better understand

o  What about this doesn’t work for you?

o  What would you need to make this work?

o  It seems like there’s something here that bothers you 

·      People have a need to say NO…Don’t just hope to hear it, but get them to say it, and say it early  

The 3 Kinds of Yes’s

·      The Counterfeit 

o  You are given a yes because it an easy escape route

o  They are only saying yes to get more information 

·      The Confirmation

o  An affirmation without any real commitment

·      The Commitment 

o  The real deal, a true agreement that leads to action

·      The three types of YES sound very much the same. You need to train yourself to learn how to recognize the subtle differences 

Email Magic 

o  Have you given up on this project?

o  Example, I was planning on getting there but got my response with an email that included “ I’ve set several emails and have left you a couple of voice mails…

What is the UC Moment (Uncommon Communica

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOJqHEhS1CtX3A4nztIBzdA
Instagram: The_Uncommon_Communicator
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@theuncommoncommunicator
Facebook: The Uncommon Communicator
LinkedIn :
https://www.linkedin.com/company/80960291/
Website :
theuncommoncommunicator.com

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

The Uncommon CommunicatorBy James Gable

  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5

5

7 ratings