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Episode 93: What If That's Not Yours to Carry? How to Stop Taking on Other People's Problems & the Healing Power of Being Witnessed in Your Pain
This week's question is: How do you know when you're holding something that's not yours to hold? Tracey and I talk about how you can inadvertently take on the emotions of others, how to recognize when you've done so, why it's not actually helpful to feel your loved ones feelings with them, and what to do instead.
Specific topics discussed include:
- How we can absorb other people's emotions and pain without even realizing it
- Emotions are highly contagious
- Our brains as problem solvers
- How boundaries are harder to hold when we get tired, sick, etc.
- How to recognize when you've picked up something that's not yours to hold
- Why it isn't helpful to take on your partner's, kids', or friends' emotions
- The double edged sword of being simultaneously a very capable and highly sensitive person
- Why not taking on other people's shit takes discipline
- Holding space and what that actually means
- The observer effect and the power of being witnessed in our pain
- Why we shouldn't rescue our kids or partners
- How taking on someone else's pain can limit the evolution of a relationship
- Identifying how our bodies manifest the shit we pick up from others
- How to discharge the stuff that's not ours
- The benefits of visualization
- How breathwork can help you release emotions and how it works to do so
- Dismantling outdated stories and updating your identity
- How thought and body patterns are like slinkys
- And more!
As always, reviews and 5-star ratings are greatly appreciated. Please head over to iTunes to leave one today if you haven't yet. It only takes a few minutes and does a lot to help us reach a wider audience with the show! Don't forget, if you'd like to support the podcast by making a donation, you can do so through Paypal here. Thank you!
Subscribe: iTunes
Resources:
Episode 92 on Healing and Magic
Episode 91 on Boundaries
Episode on the stories we tell ourselves
Mindsight by Dan Siegel
Breathwork with David Elliot and Erin Telford
Episode 90 on Marie Kondo and identity crises
Boundaries by Adelyn Birch
Piquing Our Curiosity:
The Dropout, a podcast about Elizabeth Holmes and the Theranos fraud case.
Remember, if you have any topics or questions you'd like us to address in a future episode, comment here or email us at our joint email account: [email protected]. We'd love to hear from you!
Finally, one more request for you to please head over to iTunes and leave us a 5-star rating and/or review if you're enjoying the podcast. Please note that you have to search for Curious & Curiouser in iTunes in order to leave a review — even if you're already subscribed. Thanks so much for the support and for taking this annoying extra step to rate us. We really appreciate it!
View all episodes
By Tracey Biebel, Cayly ChristensenThis week's question is: How do you know when you're holding something that's not yours to hold? Tracey and I talk about how you can inadvertently take on the emotions of others, how to recognize when you've done so, why it's not actually helpful to feel your loved ones feelings with them, and what to do instead.
Specific topics discussed include:
- How we can absorb other people's emotions and pain without even realizing it
- Emotions are highly contagious
- Our brains as problem solvers
- How boundaries are harder to hold when we get tired, sick, etc.
- How to recognize when you've picked up something that's not yours to hold
- Why it isn't helpful to take on your partner's, kids', or friends' emotions
- The double edged sword of being simultaneously a very capable and highly sensitive person
- Why not taking on other people's shit takes discipline
- Holding space and what that actually means
- The observer effect and the power of being witnessed in our pain
- Why we shouldn't rescue our kids or partners
- How taking on someone else's pain can limit the evolution of a relationship
- Identifying how our bodies manifest the shit we pick up from others
- How to discharge the stuff that's not ours
- The benefits of visualization
- How breathwork can help you release emotions and how it works to do so
- Dismantling outdated stories and updating your identity
- How thought and body patterns are like slinkys
- And more!
As always, reviews and 5-star ratings are greatly appreciated. Please head over to iTunes to leave one today if you haven't yet. It only takes a few minutes and does a lot to help us reach a wider audience with the show! Don't forget, if you'd like to support the podcast by making a donation, you can do so through Paypal here. Thank you!
Subscribe: iTunes
Resources:
Episode 92 on Healing and Magic
Episode 91 on Boundaries
Episode on the stories we tell ourselves
Mindsight by Dan Siegel
Breathwork with David Elliot and Erin Telford
Episode 90 on Marie Kondo and identity crises
Boundaries by Adelyn Birch
Piquing Our Curiosity:
The Dropout, a podcast about Elizabeth Holmes and the Theranos fraud case.
Remember, if you have any topics or questions you'd like us to address in a future episode, comment here or email us at our joint email account: [email protected]. We'd love to hear from you!
Finally, one more request for you to please head over to iTunes and leave us a 5-star rating and/or review if you're enjoying the podcast. Please note that you have to search for Curious & Curiouser in iTunes in order to leave a review — even if you're already subscribed. Thanks so much for the support and for taking this annoying extra step to rate us. We really appreciate it!