Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 95 - What to do when they’re not OK Series: How to check in when you know they’re not ok is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

The question “are you ok?” is the culturally accepted question to show concern. However, what do you do when you know that the other person is dealing with stuff and is not ok? In this episode we go through helpful tools on how to check in with someone who is clearly struggling or going through some issues in a way that is both acknowledging and supportive.

In this episode, we cover…

• How asking ‘are you ok?’ to someone who you know is not ok can cause some challenges
• How asking if someone is ok when we know they’re not can impact the other person’s acknowledgement need
• How society expects the answer to ‘are you ok?’ should be ‘yes, I’m fine’ and how this puts pressure on the person to conform to social ‘norms’
• How sometimes people don’t actually want to know how we are or interact with us but are asking out of courtesy
• How you can ask other questions to greet someone if you don’t have the capacity or interest to know how people actually are
• How to reply to someone who answers the question honestly when you don’t have the capacity or time to support them at that moment
• How acknowledging where the person is at is being supportive without trying to fix the situation
• Why it’s important to recognise what support looks like without taking on the situation on ourselves as this can impact both party’s needs negatively
• We offer different approaches to asking how a person is that are mindful of your own capacity at the time
• Why it’s important to be mindful of the reasons why you are enquiring about how the other person feels. Is it for our benefit or the benefit of the other person?
• Why it is important to offer support only if you have the capacity to do so
• How an option to support the other person is to offer choices of how they would like to be supported
• How different people may want to be acknowledged in different ways
• How it’s important to be mindful that some people find it difficult to ask for space and asking if they want space might be the best way to support them
• How feeling bad when someone doesn’t accept your support indicates that we are offering support because of our unmet needs
• How it’s ok to offer a distraction but it important to offer it in concert with something that keeps in mind what’s going as well
• Why we should not offer support that we do not have the capacity to provide
• Why you should keep in mind what you learned about the other person through the relationship you built with them
• How there is no one-size-fits-all scenario

Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

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