Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 156 - "The 6 essential parts of an effective apology" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Sorry. A word that holds a lot of weight but often has little meaning. An apology is so much more, which is why we have created a blueprint to help us navigate the moments where we have messed up. Join us for another installment of "Claire's Most Important Episodes" as we breakdown the Apology Blueprint. By the end of this episode you'll have all the steps needed for an effective apology and know the difference following (or bypassing) these steps will have on you and your relationships.

In this episode we cover:

• The many areas in your life where this can be transformative
• The role trauma plays when apologizing
• When an apology doesn't have the desired effect
• Why sorry isn't part of the blueprint
• The six parts to an apology
• How our unmet needs can effect an apology
• The impact an effective or ineffective apology can have on you and your relationships
• What gives the apology meaning or strips it of meaning
• The essential 8 steps
• The full Apology Blueprint

Episode References:

• The trauma episode - Episode 86 - Trauma Series: What is trauma?
• The guilt and shame episode - Episode 43 - The Guilt & Shame Series: The difference between guilt and shame
• The clearing niggles episode - Episode 61 - Friendship Series: Clearing Niggles

Download The Apology Blueprint PDF here: https://theuniversalneeds.com/Apology

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 155 - "Why do some people get second chances, and some people don't?" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Ever wonder why it seems some people throw second chances around like confetti but you didn't get invited to the party? Unfortunately it's unlikely the invitation got lost in the mail however there is still a gift to be received. Join us today where we get into the first part of second chances and discuss why they are (or aren't given), the crucial mistakes that can be made and the most important thing that can be taken from all second chances, whether they are received or not.

In this episode we cover:

• The factors that play into why some people receive second chances and some don't
• Why people need second chances?
• Investing and withdrawing from "relationship accounts"
• The rare occurrence when not getting a second chance doesn't have to do with you
• How good intentions can sometimes make things worse
• The surprising place where trust is often built and can actually be accelerated
• The importance of acknowledgement
• The simplified reasons someone doesn't get a second chance
• When you aren't who you used to be
• How Serena gets extra funds in her relationship accounts
• The opportunity we get in every second chance (whether you get it or not)
• The mistake a lot of people make when trying to make amends
• The second part of second chances

Episode References:

• The trauma series - Episode 86 - Trauma Series: What is trauma?, Episode 87 - Trauma Series: How do you identify trauma? and Episode 88 - Trauma Series: How to heal trauma and triggers
• The episode about intention vs impact - Episode 41 - Why your intention REALLY doesn't matter…
• The original Apology Blueprint episode - Episode 16 - How to apologize (and why sorry isn't enough)

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 154 - "What are your relationship orbits, and how can they protect you?" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Get ready to blast off because we're taking a journey to outer space and exploring our relationship orbits. We've talked about them before and today we're taking a deeper dive into what they are, how they are determined and how you can use them to protect yourself.

In this episode we cover:

• How excited we are about our new Rode podcast setup
• What is the relationship orbits?
• The two aspects of the orbits
• What determines the distance of our orbits
• The different facets of trust
• What happens when we want to trust people
• Serena's "Well Shit" moment
• How potential can manipulate our orbits
• Letting our orbits fall naturally
• Loving people from a distance
• The roles trust and trauma play in our relationship orbits
• Healing broken trust
• Claire's strategy for sending people into the far depths of space
• What happens when we become complacent in our relationships
• How to support our orbits through the actions we take
• The relationship between trust and boundaries

Episode References:

• The niggle monster episode - Episode 61 - Friendship Series: Clearing Niggles
• The original relationship orbits episode - Episode 17 - What to do when you're waiting for an apology that will never come
• The honesty episode - 146 - How honest should you be with children?
• The traumas episode - Episode 65 - People Pleasing Series - The root of most people pleasing

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 153 - "The power of whimsy when meeting your needs" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Today we're going on a whimsical adventure and you're invited. The power of whimsy goes way beyond sparkles and bubbles and is a highly underestimated tool that can be used to bring a little something extra to many areas of your life. Join us on today's episode as we get our whimsy on and talk about how adding even just a little whimsy can have a big impact on your needs.

In this episode we cover:

- What is a Ta-Da List?

- Expanding your Emotional Experience and Expression Need

- Using whimsy as a tool to mitigate issues in your life

- The many adventures of Serena

- Creating magic in moments where others would see misery

- What's essential to bringing in whimsy

- When it's helpful to bring in whimsy

- Using whimsy to enhance your experiences

- Getting comfortable with whimsy

- Why people are afraid of whimsy

- The joy of bubbles

- Using whimsy to help make something enjoyable that usually isn't

- The flexibility of whimsy

- Creating a whimsical ripple effect and the affect that can have on you

Episode References:

- The niggle episode - Episode 61 - Friendship Series: Clearing Niggles

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple Episode 152 - "Are you avoiding something that would meet your needs because you're not "good at it"?" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

How often do you stop yourself from doing something that would meet your needs simply because you think you can't or you don't think you'll be good at it? Well, you're not alone. Join us for today's episode where we talk about why we do this, what we should be considering and what we're actually holding ourselves back from.

In this episode we cover:

- The language usage that stops us from even trying

- The processing power of karaoke

- Fear of failure

- What happens when someone believes they can't do something

- Serena's new hobby

- Finding the elements that elevate your experience of meeting your needs

- What a banana duct taped to a wall has to do with anything

- Illusions of success

- Connecting to your why

- Claire's art debut

- What's the point?

- Connecting to your humanity through imperfection

- Why Claire wants to be one of the birds

- Living your best life

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 151 - "What Bieber, a bucket and Bourdain have to do with needs" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

It may sound like the setup for a joke, but today's episode really isn't a laughing matter. So often people act without regard to who will have to deal with the consequences of their choices, actions and behaviors. In today's episode we put a needs lens on a celebrity situation and discuss the ripple effect we have on those around us

In this episode we cover:

- Why we are talking about Bieber, a bucket and Bourdain

- Reasonable expectations

- Superiority and the workforce

- The ripple effect of our actions

- Why wouldn't you help someone?

- Respecting community

- The emotional impact and ripple effect our emotions can have

- The unconscious spiral that's created by not realizing the negative impact to our needs

- Tapping into what sits in our subconscious

Episode References:

- The last episode about judgement - Episode 150 - Why "We listen and we don't judge is so problematic

- The Britney episode - Episode 122 - We are all human

- Episode 149 - The ONLY thing you owe other people

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 150 - "Why "We listen and we don't judge" is SO problematic" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Viral trends are a dime a dozen and one in particular has caught our eye. On today's episode we're diving into the viral trend "We listen and we don't judge". Join us as we discuss how this seemingly nonjudgemental space can prove to be harmful and act to undermine the trust of relationships, eventually pulling them apart.

In this episode we cover:

- The "We listen and we don't judge" trend

- Is judging people a bad thing?

- What can happen when spaces are labeled "nonjudgemental"

- Social norms and the expectations related to trends

- How trends like this can harm your relationships

- Why is this trend so problematic?

- Shielding to avoid consequences

- The vicious cycle that can be created

- What dodgeball has to do with it

- The missed opportunity for deeper connection and healing

- Why it's a little culty

- How we unconsciously undermine our relationships

- Why we allow people to judge us

Episode References:

- The episode from our friendship series - Episode 60 - Friendship Series: Having the hard conversations and getting comfortable with being uncomfortable

- The steps to an apology episode - Episode 16 - Apology Series: How to apologize (and why sorry isn't enough)

- The clearing niggles episode - Episode 61 - Friendship Series: Clearing Niggles

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 149 - "The ONLY thing you owe other people" is now LIVE!

*Trigger Warning - Example of a man seriously compromising woman's needs

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Social norms have many of us thinking that we owe others or that others owe us. Whether it is due to conditioning, a bid to be seen as polite or a sense of entitlement, there are many reasons we find ourselves expecting and abiding to these norms that don't always serve us. Join us on today's episode where we discuss what is the one thing we actually do owe to each other.

In this episode we cover:

- What is the one thing we actually owe others

- Societal expectations

- Creating a sense of obligation through an entitlement of response

- What social norms have to do with being polite

- When its a "you" problem

- What the patriarchy has to do with it

- The difference between being rude and being direct

- The toxicity of social norms

- The role choice plays in rudeness

- How consistently meeting our needs helps us to move away from societal norms

- What can happen if we don't honor where we're at (regardless of the social norm)

- Creating closer relationships by removing social norms that don't serve us

Episode References:

- The trauma episode - Episode 87 - Trauma Series: How do you identify trauma?

Notes:

Link to the "Don't be polite to me who creep you out" song -

On TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jodeliciouss/video/7305138583751380254?lang=en

And on youtube: https://youtube.com/shorts/jF9uLGAUsRA?si=mjAK1Brjc-P-Sz3-

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 148 - "How to find your needs "big hitters"" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Given that everything we do every second of every day is done in an attempt to get our needs met, you would think it would be easy to know what things would have the most impact. Unfortunately, that isn't always the case. Especially when we are in a state of coping, it's not always easy to recognize the things that will REALLY meet our needs and make the noticeable difference within us. Join us on today's episode where we discuss finding, and remembering, the "big hitters" that can make the big difference.

In this episode we cover:

- Claire's "self-care" getaway

- Taking the 80/20 rule and making it a 95/5

- Finding your "big hitters"

- Combining little things to create a big needs impact

- The whimsy of Woody T. Box

- How habits and patterns can prevent us from fully meeting our needs

- Making an appointment to meet your needs

- Why we often don't do the things to support our needs

- Being students of our work

- Noticing the physical indicators of nourishment

- Recognizing when you're masking your needs

Episode References:

- The episode where we reference "power ups" - Episode 28 - An antidote to anxiety

- The episode where we talk about the Red-Green Spectrum - Episode 3 - I need to do WHAT?

- The "But" episode - Episode 143 - Get your But out of here

- The episode where we talk about the levels of competence - 134 - What if feedback could be the ultimate gift?

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 147 - "How much emotion should you show children?" is now LIVE!

Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide

Emotions can play a big role in cultivating a relationship of trust and transparency with children. Tune into this week's episode where we discuss how connecting with and expressing your emotions can better equip your child with the ability to connect with, process and flow with their own.

In this episode we cover:

- The connection between emotionality and honesty

- How being open with our emotions can help to children learn to process

- What happens when children aren't witnessing emotions

- Showing children the process of emotionality

- Using emotions as teachable moments

- Smelling the flowers and blowing out the candles

- Validating emotions to children

- Supporting your child's needs through supporting your own

- Giving permission to feel emotion

- Showing the full spectrum of emotion

- Teaching children to expressing their emotions in selfirst ways

- Allowing ourselves to be messy

- The importance of dialog with emotion

Episode References:

- Our last episode - Episode 146 - How honest should you be with children?

- The emotional tunnel episode - Episode 32 - Why (generally speaking) there are no such thing as negative emotions