Ernie Bedlam's Bedtime Stories

Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories Episode 7 – July 20, 2017

It’s been a bit of a stretch, but things happened, were happening, and continue to happen, although now they’re not (so much) happening, but still lie in wait to alarm us with regularity.

In spite of all that: Here’s Podcast Numero Seven!

Selections include (indeed are limited to, this one’s a quickie, but Ernie says y’all like ‘em that way, and I’m pretty sure he was talking about the podcast – good grief, I hope so) “Poetry While Waiting for an Exterminator,” “Scratch ‘n Sniff,” and “Little Boy Lew.”

Music featured this week is from amazing guitarist John Lawler, “Tennessee Rumble,” from his album 12 Folk Instrumentals for Solo Nylon String Guitar, and Al Rose’s tune “On the Shelf,” from his album Sad Go Lucky. Both albums are available at iTunes and you should go get you some musical goodness from these guys.

“I had to bark at that weird shit at the end because it was fucking weird. Don’t do that ever again.” – Augie, Dorothy’s talking dog.

Cover art by Robert Johnson, from a photo by Maureen Collins.

Produced by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC – Chicago, IL

All written and narrated material by Craig Champlin

Copyright © 2017, All Rights Reserved

Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories Episode 6 - June 15, 2017

Tripping all over himself. Two hilarious tales, but we start off with a bit of poetry. This episode, for your listening pleasure, we begin with Ernie’s Song, and meander through Mt. St. Helens aka Ernie’s Tricked!, and finish up with Road Trip. And don’t forget! Craig’s got a couple of book signings coming up in June!

4PM June 24th, at The 5th Quarter Tap, 18105 Dixie Highway in Homewood IL and another one at Hogeye Music, in Evanston, from noon to 2PM on – well, the date eludes my tortured brain at the moment, so listen to the podcast for that information. (See what I did there? Heh.)

Music featured this week is from Ernie’s pal Spoo Willoughby (aka Vernon Tonges) with his original called “Texas.” Other incidental music is by Craig, his very own self, playing his very own guitar.

“This episode is awesome! Now take me outside.” – Augie, Dorothy Conway’s talking dog.

Cover art by Robert Johnson, from a photo by Maureen Collins.

Produced by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC – Chicago, IL

All written and narrated material by Craig Champlin

Copyright © 2017, All Rights Reserved

Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories Episode 5 – May 7, 2017

A nice full episode, twisted, tortured and edited into a reasonable facsimile of a podcast in one sitting, despite the fact that my ADD is a pre-existing condition. And hey, Craig’s got a couple of book signings coming up in June! The one that is nailed down is 4PM June 24th, at The 5th Quarter Tap, 18105 Dixie Highway in Homewood IL. And if Craig receives soap, underpants, Cheetos and nose hair clipper, he’ll lie on the floor and flail like a dead bug. To music. It’s an amazing thing, trust me, I’ve seen blurry photographs; it’s very special.

This episode includes the stories “Political Animals,” “Ernie Wasn’t His Real Name,” “Hats” and the poem, “The Selfie.” All conceived, written and narrated by Craig Champlin.

This episode also features two songs from Al Rose, “Bonus Opus” (which appears with the tale “Political Animals”) and “Same Wrong Thing” from his album “Spin Spin Dizzy”, available on iTunes. Used with permission.

The following sound effects are included under Creative Commons Attribution/Non-Commercial License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/us/

No changes made to any effect unless otherwise noted

“Ernie Wasn’t His Real Name”

- “Train” Jackob Thiesen

- “Glass Vase” Buddha Master

- “Turning Pages” Psycho Pancake

- “Toasting Glass” DJ Burnham

- “Match and Fire” Sam Kolbar

Cover art by Robert Johnson, from a photo by Maureen Collins.

Produced by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC – Chicago, IL

Copyright © 2017, All Rights Reserved

Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories Episode 4.5 – April 22, 2017

This episode includes one story. One damn story. Consider it a ‘teaser’ of sorts, something to keep your Bedlam jones under control until we can get it together for a full podcast. Per usual, Ernie Bedlam is conceived, written and narrated by Craig Champlin.

This episode also features one damn song, ‘Me Oh My’ by Craig Champlin, from a live performance at S.P.A.C.E. in Evanston, IL, and features Cathie Van Wert Menard on violin. I would tell you the year, but Craig couldn’t tell me the year. So there’s that.

Seeing as we’re simply pushing out the merest of work this week, sound effects are minimal and not worth mentioning

The usual bumpers apply, provided by Tim Menard, “King of Glenwood Ave”, and Vernon Tonges, “The Teddy Bears Picnic” (John Walter Brannon)

Buy your own copy of “The Ernie Bedlam Stories” at www.ErnieBedlamStories.com.

Cover art by Robert Johnson, from a photo by Maureen Collins.

Produced by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC – Chicago, IL

Copyright © 2017, All Rights Reserved

Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories Episode 4 – April 8, 2017

This episode includes the stories “61 Homers,” “Ernie Goes to Work” and “The Talking Bird.” All conceived, written and narrated by Craig Champlin.

This episode also features two songs from John Lawler, “Nuthouse” and “Smackers” from his album “1743”, available on iTunes. Used with permission.

The following sound effects are included under Creative Commons Attribution/Non-Commercial License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/us/

No changes made to any effect unless otherwise noted

AlexAudio – “Carpet unroll”

risangkgatle – “Metal Slinky”

150237_Matthys – Hammer on Metal”

- “Ernie Goes to Work”

AJubaMusic – “Drums”

- Book plug

Other sound effects used are included under the following Creative Common License Agreements:

Creative Commons CC0 Public Domain Dedication

https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/

Glitched Tones

BBrocer

adcBicycle

Agaxly

dSter777

Bidone

Chorale Music

St. Chronicles Choir, St. Thomas Senior High School, Indonesia – “Old MacDonald Had a Farm” (Trad.)

National Taiwan University Chorus – “The Teddy Bears Picnic” (John Walter Brannon)

Cover art by Robert Johnson, from a photo by Maureen Collins.

Produced by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC – Chicago, IL

Copyright © 2017, All Rights Reserved

Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories Episode 3 - March 25, 2017

This episode includes the stories “A Behavior,” “Nothing Good Ever Happens in Glenview,” “Pockets 2” (aka Lil’ Abe – or at least that’s what I’m calling it, because sooner or later Craig is going to show up with another story named Pockets, and I’m trying to avoid additional confusion -dc), and “Ernie Goes on Tour.” All conceived, written and narrated by Craig Champlin.

Guest appearance by Vernon Tonges (aka Spoo Willoughby) who took a wrong turn off I94, and ended up in the studio. He’ll never make that mistake again. This episode features his original, “Fat Boy Cry,” as well as some other noodle-y bits we tortured out of him while he was here. For the record, it’s his recording of “Teddy Bear Picnic,” with which we delight your ears on a semi-monthly basis. We’ll tell him you said thanks.

Other music contributed by long time friend and collaborator, Tim Menard. This episode features his original “Glass of Wine.” Which is about precisely what you would think it’s about from the title. He keeps threatening to drop by, but then he lies down until he comes to his senses, so we’re gonna have to work on that.

Many thanks and credit to Texas Music Forge for included sound bed in the story “Nothing Good Ever Happens in Glenview”, used under Creative Commons Attribution/Non-Commercial License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/us/

Other sound effects used are included under the following Creative Common License Agreements:

Creative Commons Attribution – https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/us/ No changes made to any effect unless otherwise noted

MorganTJ – “Soccer game”

18hiltc – “Shotgun”

Slanesh – “Creaky door”

AJubaMusic – “Drums”

- “Nothing Good Ever Happens in Glenview”

Creative Commons CC0 Public Domain Dedication

https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/

Mitsumangas

Archeos

Scotty Moil

Jason Weber

Filmsndfx

Charles Randolph

SilenceMusic

Treblebooster

MannHawks

ToiletRollTube

Cover art by Robert Johnson, from a photo by Maureen Collins.

Produced by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC – Chicago, IL

Copyright © 2017 All Rights Reserved

This podcast features a reading of one of the Ernie tales appearing in the soon to be published Ernie Bedlam Stories, entitled "Mannequins." Also included in this episode are "Ernie Takes a Piss - Three Different Ones," "Big Dreams" and "Thursday Morning."

Featured music in this episode:

"Fishin' and Wishin'" by Lou Rider

Guitar and Vocals - Lou Rider

"The Human Pounding" by Craig Champlin

Guitar and Vocals - Craig Champlin

Other music provided by Tim Menard and Vernon Tonges

Some of the sound effects in this podcast were discovered at Freesounds.org, and are used with Creative Commons Attribution permission. Artists in this episode are: Jim Beaux, Spangle Walker, Logan Circlez, Focus Bay, Ash Fox, Tommy Google and Reg7783.

Produced and edited by Dorothy Conway, Mighty Small Studios, LLC Chicago, IL

Copyright © 2017

The first podcast from the series Ernie Bedlam’s Bedtime Stories: Chicago doggerel with mustard and a side of good intentions.

Just down the alley, and around the corner, Ernie's on his favorite bar stool, ready to weave a few fables for modern humans. Morals are arbitrary, and don't necessarily apply.

Tales of Ernie Bedlam, written and narrated by Craig Champlin, music curated and contributed by Chicago local singer/songwriters. Vernon Tonges, Tim Menard, and the Fallen Angels. Ernie’s tales will soothe, delight, disturb and amuse you.

Ernie is here to let people off the hook. They're not as fucked as they think they are.