Laura Kleinschmidt talks with Ann Polcik about her experience with breast cancer as a single mom. Ann shares how she wanted to control the situation, as well as control the emotions and responses of those she loves. The impossibility of this led to much anxiety. Listen in to see how she was helped by recognizing that she doesn’t have to be strong enough.

01:46 Ann’s greatest fear

04:09 Wanting to control others’ emotions

06:52 The perfect antidote to Ann’s need for control

10:21 Talking honestly with God

13:10 Key to pulling Ann out of the pit

15:10 Making all things new

Referenced verses: Philippians 4:13, Revelation 21:15

Laura Kleinschmidt hosts a special guest, her husband Dave Kleinschmidt, and together they discuss their instance on being right. In this episode they share a protest of rightness with movie theater strangers and a spousal disagreement regarding the ultimate important decision: how to set the car mirrors. Will they choose the victory dance of rightness or something better? 

02:14 Dave’s movie theater seat dilemma

03:31 Someone else thinks they're right, hence digging in the heels. 

05:17 Laura’s side view mirror setting quandary

05:52 Are driver’s ed teachers always right?

08:22 The ultimate right, correct person.

10:09 The desire to cover and hide our wrongness.

13:54 Thankful for forgiveness when we blow it.

14:54 To Victory dance or not? 

15:45 Humility, harmony and reconciliation

18:22 Honesty and depth in relationships

Referenced verses: Luke 18:9-14, Proverbs 11:2

Laura Kleinschmidt visits with guest Jo Kok, and together they share about their intense desire to be productive. Whether it’s pursuing regular Saturday chores or larger endeavors such as doing taxes, task completion can take an unwelcome priority in our lives. Listen in as they discuss how we sometimes link productivity to our value and a love that can free us from this.

Quotes from this episode:

“I may be functionally believing that my value comes from being able to do something, to contribute something or be of use to someone and that I am defined by what I do instead of who I am.”

“He does not see me and love me for what I can do for him, but just because that's who he is.”

“To know and believe in my deep, deep heart that who I am to God is more important than what I do, is life changing.”

02:04 - Jo’s list of good questions about lists

04:46 - Productivity Idol at the root of being “short” with family

07:49 - A “want” turned into a monster “want”

10:20 - Choosing what is better. Love that doesn’t change with me being less productive.

14:21 – Being ok with not crossing off tasks

15:27 – One’s waste is not another’s waste

19:05 – The Good - Less frustrated and more freeing. The checklist is a tool rather than a slave master.

21:00 – The goodness of others centeredness

22:50 – Being content with what Christ’s performance completed. We still work, but work doesn’t define us and dictate who we are.

Referenced verses: Luke 10:38-24

Join Laura Kleinschmidt as she welcomes guest, Justin Searles, for a discussion about impressing others and concealing weakness. They describe situations that involve coworkers, a library garage, and even a tornado. Listen in as they discover strength in being weak, identity in “the impressive one,” profound relief and walking a little bit lighter.

“I'm trying to impress them with everything I've got: all of the skills that I've got. And I'm also trying to conceal all my inadequacies or flaws. And so that's hard to do.”

“Weakness doesn't mean I'm weaselly, or I have to go around saying poor me. I'm such a loser. But no, instead it means I get my strength from someone other than myself.”

“My performance is not a deal at all as to whether or not I'm loved or not. I'm loved. I'm his. So that's a relief. It's like you can just breathe and….it's not so much work!”

2:36 Trying to impress with everything I’ve got

5:04 When bright yellow paint betrays your driving skills

5:36 Attempts to conceal

7:31 Wanting others to think highly of me? Or avoid having them think too low of me?

8:22 The one who sees through our attempt at impressiveness

10:44 In weakness, I am strong

13:04 Admitting weakness and being ok with it

13:46 Sometimes our weakness helps us see God is providing

16:44 The relaxing of your soul

17:18 Weakness in a tornado?

18:30 Profound relief, walking a little lighter

Referenced verses:

2 Corinthians 12:8-10, Matthew 11:28-30

Laura Kleinschmidt and her guest, Katy Domsten, talk about situations where they are trying to help friends, family or clients and they find themselves at times "tipping" into fixing instead of helping. Listen in as they discuss their love for helping others, the difficulty in discerning their own motives, what what warning signs to look for on the "fixing radar" and the freedom that comes from knowing who's in control.

- "Burdens becomes inappropriately heavy because we've made it something that's not ours to carry or we put ourselves in a role that is not ours."

- "I have such freedom as I remember the truths and trust Jesus with my family and friends and clients and situations that come. Just a burden lifted."

- "It's beautiful and hope inspiring to work in community with others."

3:43 We can think we have the power or the control to make everything right.

4:17 Starting with good motives then "tipping" into something else.

5:29 Some roots of why we fix

6:39 Wanting to bring relief and escape in domestic abuse situations

10:21 The one that is in control of all things.

12:29 Wrestling with feeling the need to be perfect

14:09 The radar "blips" when we've tipped into an inappropriate role.

17:16 My responsibility or my concern? Which circle?

20:21 A weight that is lifted!

21:03 Where freedom is found

21:53 The beauty and goodness of seeing others help

Referenced Verses:

Proverbs 19:21, Isaiah 46:4, Hebrews 2:8

Join Laura Kleinschmidt and her guest, Laura Michaels, as they look at how they tend to want to please people in different situations. They also dig deep to see what the "root" of their people pleasing is. How can they get free from this? A few of our favorite quotes:

- "How you view yourself, is sometimes framed by how you think other people view you."

- "The people pleasing scenario that bugs me the most is....When I tried my hardest to do the right thing or please someone and then they thought my intention was something else."

- "So putting faith in what other people think of me or trying to control what other people think of me, that's just like building a house on the sand. I want to build my house on the rock."

00:57 Laura M's small slice of life 

03:27 Explaining over-explaining

04:28 Wanting others to be happy with what we are doing. 

05:15 Laura K's small slice of life 

08:17 Fearing how others think of us.

09:19 Remembering where I get our identity from, rather than focusing on how I perform or what others think....this is good.

13:33 People say "let go" but how do you do that?

14:10 Where to find safety when feeling ensnared by people please, like the jaws of an animal trap.

17:11 The freeing up of "wasted mental space."

19:33 Putting my hope in something firm, frees me up to not worry so much about what others are thinking

19:47 The rock is Christ, and that's what is so good. 

Referenced Verses:

1 John 3:1, Proverbs 29:25

Laura Kleinschmidt and her guest, Anna Wojtul, discuss anxious situations where they find themselves using self-talk to attempt to bully themselves into acting differently.  They seek out some of the roots of their negative self-talk and find that performance and seeking refuge are key themes. Here's some of what you'll hear as you listen in on their conversation:

- "I put my sense of value and worth in this person that I think I should be."

- "There's something even better than magically turning into this charismatic person or having a zero percent memory failure rate."

- "Whereas the message that I often given to myself is, 'What's wrong with you? Do better!' The message that I get from Jesus is, 'I love you. Come and rest '"

01:30 Anna's wedding social anxiety situation

03:26 Laura's memory lapse situation

05:11 The root of the negative self-talk - trying to achieve a standard we set for ourselves.

07:35 Six Sigma? 3.4 defects per million? What's that about?

08:30 Being the judge and the receiver of the judgement at the same time.

09:10 Looking for a refuge

09:30 How Jesus is different from us and why that's really good.

12:00 A sense of peace and not being alone

13:20 Showing intelligent love for others

15:11 Beating up on those who bear the likeness of God 

19:28 The accessible Jesus.

Referenced Verses:

Psalm 139:17-18, Ephesians 2:8-9

Laura Kleinschmidt and her guest, Laura Michaels, discuss their fear of making the wrong choice and inspect their own hearts as to what they're believing drives that fear. Laura Michael's shares, "I functionally am believing that if I make the right decision, well, then life will go well. And on the flip side, if I make the wrong decision, well now everything's ruined and I can't possibly go back and fix it."  The two Lauras take this and replace it with better thoughts regarding control and provision.

01:13 Laura M shares her indecisiveness in returning to work after having her first child

03:44 The root of Laura M's indecisiveness

04:27 Root or Route? Laura K's super small slice of life in deciding on travel routes, and the root of it.

7:01 Exhaustion and crammed mental space

7:03 What's good in this?

11:21 Getting practical by replacing lies with truth

16:50 Celebrating the good! Someone's in control.

Verses referred to:

Jeremiah 32:17, Proverbs 19:21, Matthew 6:25-34, Colossians 1:15-20

Laura and her guest, Meredith Hodge, discuss what they avoid and what they run to in the pursuit of comfort. They address conflict and pre-grieving situations and what it looks like to "pursue peace even when it's uncomfortable." And you'll hear how they relate comfort to easy buttons and Handel's Messiah. Finally they'll talk about an ultimate source of comfort and how good it is.

01:44 Meredith shares about conflict and comfort 

03:25 The Staples Easy Button   

04:09 Laura shares about pre-grieving and comfort

07:20 Not being afraid of feeling uncomfortable.

12:42 Getting practical with seeking better comfort than conflict-avoidance

14:57 Getting practical with seeking better comfort than technology

20:01 What's really good

23:43 Meredith's favorite "F" word

Handel's Messiah: Comfort Ye

Verses referred to:

Matthew 11:28-30, 2 Corinthians 1:3-5. Hebrews 4:15, Isaiah 40:1, Isaiah 49:13-16

What does it look like for someone to engage with the person and work of Jesus in their everyday life? In this season of Everyday Good, Laura Kleinschmidt interviews different individuals who come with a specific everyday struggle. Laura and her guest each share a small slice of life and how they’re handling it. Then together they explore how the person and work of Jesus is good in the midst of it all.