When something works for you, when it feels good and aligned with your goals and values, you need to name it, claim it and sustain it. One of those things in my life is Check In. I not only tell people about the process (name it), I reap benefits when I do the process (claim it), and I do the process often (sustain it). All disciplines require these three components, and believe me, each of them are catalyzed when we collectively invest in the work together. Becky and I talk about why we need to consciously start checking in. Becky Porter, PhD, is President and CEO, Military Child Education Coalition, and is a former Commander for Public Health Command Europe. She is devoted to compassionate thought leadership.  We recorded this podcast at the end of February, 2020, pre COVID 19, while I was finishing up writing the book. I am more committed to this conversational routine now than ever before. I look forward to your feedback and engagement with the tool. www.joincheckin.com   

“Let’s be honest about our modern-day social lives.  Busyness, overstimulation, automation, pressure to produce and disconnection run rampant in our adult routines. We are saturated in experiences of being partially present, moderately engaged, or half-heartedly committed. We are so focused on getting things done, exchanging information, or making decisions, that it’s hard to connect to ourselves, much less build resilient connections with others. We can be so focused on taking care of or trying to please others that we forget who we really are and what we really stand for.”

Dr. Krystal White, Check In

Retreating is an efficient way to discover some of your essential truths. Periods of seclusion, intentional rest, and focused attention on the “internal world” are well known to boost our physical, social and emotional well-being. Today, Chris and Krystal discuss why many successful individuals, especially men, still struggle to “retreat.” (Check out what the conscious space he's creating!) Although we want more space and time to reflect, concentrate our own energy and focus on ourselves, actually taking it does not come naturally. We offer individual and community bases guidance for making retreats more accessible at the psychological and relational level.  

What or who has the most influence on how you think

            -about your money

            -about your looks

            -about your health

            -about your intimate relationship

            -about your future

Maybe you don’t think about yourself as much as you consider your children, your partner, other family members or your colleagues or supervisors, or your local/global groups. Apply the same questions to those people.

Often, we don’t slow down enough to consider where our thoughts are coming from. Many times, they aren’t our own.  Kristy Laterza and Krystal discuss why the discipline of thinking for yourself is essential for our internal well being, and for our external progress. We explore how we do (or don’t do) this at a practical level, the impact our age has on how well we withstand social pressure, and how easy it go with convention even though we want to be original.

We've all faked something, at some point, in a relationship, social setting or work. Mostly, a lot of us have faked things to ourselves. Stacey and I aren't talking about doing something you're committed to but don't really get/like at the beginning. We're talking about the level of deception where we are out of alignment with our own inherent "truth." Appearances are important only to the degree that they express yourself. Often we become so used to "this is how it is" or to how things look that we forget who we are, what we stand for, and what our bodies are telling us.

This discipline isn't easy to adopt. You will upset others. And, it does TAKE ENERGY.  Yet, if you only committed to one discipline this entire year, this might be the one that produces the most benefit for your SOUL.

Stop faking yourself or others in the choices you make. Living the "truth as I know it" is the medicine our professions, families, teams and individual spirits need right now.

We are a culture always on the go. Many of us have resisted slowness and being at home for a long time. The average person in the US commutes 26 mins each way to work each day. That comprises NINE full days each year. For myself, I've chosen mobility and multi-focus for the better part of the last decade. Those 5 am wake up calls to teach spin used to fuel me. I boasted in The Letter Code that I needed less than 6 hours a night to sleep. I have re-defined my resistance to rest in the past 18 months. This process has NOT been pretty, and it has prepared me for this current, temporary experience. What once made me adaptive and flexible NOW only inhibits my growth.

Without question, this is the time where we are being forced to slow down. Time. Take it. Will we fight against slowing down? Numb ourselves out on netflix, gaming, online shopping, youtube and news obsessions? Or mindfully, lovingly, use it to remember to tend to our "homes" -----our mind/bodies/spirits, our dwellings, our intimate relationships, our professions. This short podcast offers some guidance on what obstacles we are likely to encounter, and some encouragement to persist WITH PATIENCE the name of "upping" our collective growth. 

We can create wellness and growth in this season of a LOT OF CHAOS! Our thoughts are just as contagious as our germs are...and so are the beliefs of what we stand for. Where do you want to see change the most right now? What needs to be dismantled, re-modeled, or re-committed to?  We all will be reactive and stressed in the upcoming weeks. That's ok. After we react, we can move toward honesty and integrity, ask for compassion and forgiveness, and step up for what we stand for.

WHAT DO YOU STAND FOR?

There is more light here than we may see. Consciousness, kindness, service is being amplified. From this place, responsible action is more efficient. We are ready and capable to rise together---create the places, programs, politics, people and ways of being that are aligned with our own heartful, intentional visions. What do you stand for? Where can you learn to consciously stand for it? How can you help support innovators, unsung heroes, community leaders, and those with inspiring skills into positions of power?

The adult brain has a lot of built in systems to reduce and avoid risk taking. Our beautiful emotional systems go on high alert when we sense risk and activate our controlled logic system. Simply: our minds “talk us out of” risky behaviors. Our higher mind, however, understands that we get better results when we behave in “non-standard” (aka risky!) ways. Pauline and Krystal discuss how to influence others to take risks, innovate and motivate others to do the same. We suggest how to take result-driven risks at work and share a few personal commitments. 

The myth that we can “achieve balance” leads to burn out, inauthentic posturing and perfectionistic individualism. Leaders, especially senior and executive leaders, must stop passing along the message that staff need to “balance their work with their lives.” Given that many people willfully and happily devote their significant contribution to “work”, this message just doesn’t “add” up. Why don’t we make healthy organizations instead of forcing staff to “balance” it all? Setting priorities, honoring boundaries and asking for help must replace this over simplistic, and covertly dangerous, message.

On Average, an adult uses over 7000 words a day. When is the last time someone said something to you at work and your attention peaked, your heart clapped or your body leaned forward? I’m sure you can easily think of a meeting where nothing one person shared was memorable. The discipline we’d like to focus more on this month is improving the competent and consistent use of language. Believe us, if you want your words to positively impact others, it  requires INTENTIONAL focus and practice. Jonathan and Krystal provide some guidance on how to be a more confident and competent communicator. Our upcoming Mindful Men program (details to be announced soon!) will amplify the communication skills of leaders---aiming to guide them to use their words to positively impact listeners.  

We are in a season of great opportunity, and also uncertainty.  Most of us function out of survival, success or transformation. In the course of a single day, we move in and out of each state. We are defensive or overly appeasing, we work to earn recognition or stability, or we guide ourselves and others to grow. Season 2 is all about what ACTIONS you can do or avoid to operate from a growth mindset, lead limitless and shape the future of professional lifestyles. Each month, Krystal and her comrades offer you an episode guiding you to STOP a behavior and another guiding you to START one. We are aiming to get really practical on how you can lead the next generation to their more meaningful, progressive production. It's time to tune in and speak out. Our tribe needs you.