This second part is one of the places where people sometimes get stuck. I want to go through this with you so it is easy and accessible to anyone who approaches this process.  To experience something means to have had practice in an endeavor or circumstance.  

To experience is a sensory dynamic.  It is receiving stimuli through your thought processes, your feelings, and your physical sensations. In the moment of engagement, and this is a fundamental point, you are reflexively and naturally “taking in" stimuli with everything you have within you. There is no effort to receive and experience engagement. Your senses turn on, your feelings awaken, and your attention becomes alive.  You have absorbed it. It is the “taking in” that experience, dare I say their energy, that deepens your awareness and heightens your focus within the interpersonal contact.  

When you are to experience a person, you are receiving them. You do not come in with an agenda. You are there to extend your presence and meet your energy with theirs.  Here’s a common example of how the word “experience" plays out in everyday life. Think of yourself in traffic. Better yet, think of yourself sitting next to the person who is driving through traffic. What is their energy like? Do you feel that?  

And when I say “taking in” that experience, how about when you “take in” a movie. What do those terms mean to you? How does one, “take in” a movie, exactly? Let me explain: You buy your ticket, you might get something to eat, you sit down, and you “Watch," as I outlined in the first step. You “take in” or pay close attention to and follow along with the movie.  When you “take in” a movie, you’re experiencing it.  Its sounds, its moments, and the way it makes you feel.  

And every time you’re with another person, that’s precisely what you do. You sense their feeling, their presence, their energy. That’s what experience means. You’re simply “with” them.  You’ve watched, taken a look at them, and seen what your eyes have offered, but now you’re just “taking in” their humanness. Your assessment of their feelings, their energy, is not limited to your observations.  No, rather it’s offering them your full attention, just as if you were sitting in front of a movie.  It is in this moment that presents the beginning of a relationship. A relationship, by definition, implies longevity. But the beginning is the “taking in” of a person’s energy.  To be with them, and allow them to be with you.

I’ll tie this together by quoting from the book: “Is it hard to quantify? Sometimes. But when you are truly experiencing something, from watching your child are his first steps to taking in the energy from another person, you’re in that moment fully and completely. It takes a half-second, but you’re right there.  You  are with that experience, moment to moment, and the feeling you get is tangible. You know it when you’ve got it.”

For more information on Ed and his services visit  https://www.acoachforyourheart.com/