Topics include food diaries, Paris Hilton's "real" voice, ninja turtles and internalized misogyny, crying while pretty, chronic autism, deathbed wishes, and Starbucks soy boys. Plus, a Cosmopolitan magazine from the year 2000 explains why it’s okay when men can’t acknowledge our birthdays. And we play a shocking game of F**k/Marry/Kill with 3 classic cookie treats.