I asked and you answered! What did you learn about conflict resolution and what does mainstream tell us about how to resolve conflict. Essentially, nothing. You were taught very little as adults and whatever you learned as children about conflict, didn't seem to get brought forth into the adult world. 

So why aren't we teaching the skill of  "healthy conflict" to our young adults entering into relationships and the workplace? 

Well, in this episode we are going to go over one model of conflict resolution used in couples therapy, and that model was reseached by John and Julie Gottman, the creators of Gottman therapy and The Gottman Institute. Now this one ONE perspective on how it can be done, and maybe it will work for you, and maybe it won't, but it's worth a try. 

Also, think about how we can be doing better as a society to teach these skills, just as math and science is taught. 

Here are the questions from the Gottman Flexible and Inflexible activity: 

• Can you help me to understand why your “inflexible” needs or values are so important to you? 

The Gottmans have some great books and workshops as well. You can download the Gottman Card Deck app for free on your phone to help make date night a little more interesting...

https://www.gottman.com/product/the-seven-principles-for-making-marriage-work/

https://www.gottman.com/product/the-relationship-cure/

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