Falling in Love Montage

Nostalgia kills: a talking point for a lot of current issues but also an appropriate sentiment for episode 19: Jem and the Holograms (2015). Buttholes like me (Valerie) who were so precious about a cartoon they watched while still sporting their milk teeth, sized this film up and cut it down—sight unseen. My generation's refusal to embrace this re-imagining shut Jem out of the theater after just two weeks. Once I decided not to see it I never thought about it again, but that was not the case for many people who vilified talented director Jon M. Chu and spewed unjustifiable hatred and vitriol in all corners of the internet. Fortunately I pulled my head out of my ass long enough to look around and see a path less followed. Saved was I from sitting on a porch with Clint Eastwood, smoking that wacky "when I was a kid" pipe—and I watched Jem and the Holograms. —Guys, it was truly, truly, truly outrageous— We hope you'll watch it too (at minimum listen to the soundtrack). This film is chock full of inspiring female power and it rocks too. Yeah, it's different...it's been repackaged for a new audience. Don't we want to share our hero Jem with tomorrow's female rebels? More importantly we want a sequel and we need your help! Tell Jon M. Chu, tell Hasbro, tell your friends, tell my friends, use the hashtag #wearethemisfits

As I uploaded the episode I couldn't help but wonder, will anybody listen? If they do listen, will they be surprised the episode is shorter than the running time of the movie? Across town Helen was getting a surprise of her own; the details of which I'm uniformed. I expect she'll tell me at brunch. What I do know is this, Matt flew coach with one of stars of Sex and the City. Who? You'll have to listen to find out.

Sweet Cheesus! Are you asking yourself "Did Helen and Valerie really watch the Christian Mingle movie"? The answer is yes—we watched it twice. If you're Christ-curious and want to pretend that you've watched it, simply listen to this episode. Take a leap of faith that we're probably more entertaining than the *actual film. *no actual film's feelings were hurt in the description of this podcast

Happy 20th Birthday to The Craft. Sisters Helen and Valerie delight in discussing this "coming of mage" film. Nancy, however, is sorry that Chris won't be around for the discussion. Don't be like Chris.

Matt Damon has been quoted saying, "A friend of mine said there are only three good sequels, The New Testament is better than the Old, Huck Finn is better than Tom Sawyer, and Godfather II is better than The Godfather."

Edge of Reason is definitely not Godfather II and also, did I really just quote Matt Damon quoting someone? I guess this means we don't have to watch Jason Bourne [probably going to anyway].

In this v.v. complicated sequel, and to the detriment of the film, Bridget spends more time being humiliated than she spends making diary entries. Mark Darcy is ever stalwart and Daniel Cleaver is...wait, why is he here?

Helen and Valerie both agree that Edge of Reason should have resumed one whole year later but, as usual, no one consulted us.

When the weather is hot and you just can't find the time to get together with your sister to talk for 2 hours about a Renée Zellweger movie, that means...

Fellas, grab your watermelons; ladies, shake your maracas; college boys, put your pickles on everyone's plates; AND for crying out loud Baby, don't step on the one!

Helen and Valerie shave 2 hours off of their Dirty Dancing discussion only to be left with --- 2 more hours?!?!  

We're super into you. As such, we've been taking this relationship slow. We waited seven episodes to introduce you to our mother and now, after ten episodes, we're inviting you to a wedding.

Cut your hair, grab your bag, and come along with us on a 2 hour adventure to South Port, North Carolina where young, white people fall in love. Helen and Valerie spoil the double plot twist in this surprisingly fun lady thriller adapted from, I can't believe it, a Nicholas Sparks novel.