Ep. 30 | Family Karma, KD’s Mom

Call and Response Ep. 30 Family Karma, KD’s Mom

I feel that my dharma is taking me into different direction, that family karma. Karma related to a lot of suffering, a lot of what I would consider tamasic energy, toxic and so if you or Maharajji would have any advice when you feel your dharma is, you know, upholding you and protecting you and…

“We don’t know our parents as people, for the most part, until maybe we get older. They’re people. I don’t know how my mother went through the day. I don’t know what my father… what tortures he had in his life, and betrayals and hidden desires that he couldn’t fulfill. I have no idea what went on with him. All I know is how he treated me and you know, another thing and it’s a theory of mine, I can’t prove it, but I kind of feel like we learn to see ourselves the way our parents saw themselves. Not the way they saw us. But the way they saw themselves, we absorb that. And we mimic that by seeing ourselves the same way. I don’t know, I can’t prove it, but it feels like that to me.” – Krishna Das

Q: Thank you for coming to Encinitas.  And I have a question. You mentioned the ripening, ripening of the karma, you also mentioned that when you let go of, you know, being obsessed or identifying with the movie of ourselves, thinking about others you may feel happy, so at this moment, I feel that my dharma is taking me into different direction, that family karma. Karma related to a lot of suffering, a lot of what I would consider tamasic energy, toxic and so if you or Maharajji would have any advice when you feel your dharma is, you know, upholding you and protecting you and…

KD: Is what, opposing?

Q: No, upholding dharma, you know? Holding you? And then the family karma kind of pulls you in the direction and yeah… it doesn’t make me happy to think about what’s happening with the family and this is sixty years. It’s not one year or five years.

KD: Yeah, yeah.  Well, there’s family and then there’s family. First of all, we’re made up of our parents. We didn’t come from the sky. We’re made up of them. So, there’s an inner. The outer is not as important as the inner and you can’t really free yourself… Maharajji said, as long as your parents are alive, the greatest worship that you can do is to honor your parents. Forget the temples. Forget the deities. Forget your japa. Serve your parents. He said that. I remember one time, this couple was having a fight, right? They came to Maharajji, and He said to the man, and He said, “It’s ok, just see her as your mother.”  And he says, “I hate my mother” Maharajji just couldn’t understand.  So, it’s big stuff, you know? Big stuff. And you just, you do what you can. You deal with what you can. That’s all. You don’t, there’s no clock ticking, you have to get it all worked out by 10:30 tonight otherwise it’s over, you know? You deal with what you can, the best way you can and you recognize that parents, somebody did it to them, just like they did it to you. Just like you’re doing it to your kids. So, who’s the victim and who’s the perpetrator? Where was the first perpetrator? How did that start? So, you know, we don’t know our parents as people, for the most part, until maybe we get older. They’re people. I don’t know how my mother went through the day. I don’t know what my father… what tortures he had in his life, and betrayals and hidden desires that he couldn’t fulfill. I have no idea what went on with him. All I know is how he treated me and you know, another thing and it’s a theory of mine, I can’t prove it, but I kind of feel like we learn to see ourselves the way our parents saw themselves. Not the way they saw us. But the way they saw themselves, we absorb that. And we mimic that by seeing ourselves the same way. I don’t know, I can’t prove it, but it feels like that to me.

Q: Thank you and I hear you and I know that honoring the parents is one of the greatest, if not the greatest honor.