Fearless Films

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Possibly the only horror franchise that got better because it went to space, we end this month and this series with bang - its 1992's Critters 4!

After a mishap with a specimen containment pod, our hero Charlie finds himself in space, and in the future. Trapped with a ragtag salvage crew aboard a failing space station with a glitchy AI controlling the place, Charlie and his new friends must survive another Crite outbreak. Can they survive long enough for help to arrive? And will that help, in the form of greedy corporate weasels, actually save them?

Join us as we discuss why friendship will save the future, the absurd amount of future stars that are in this movie, and how Jason Voorhees may have ripped off Critters!

So secure the airlocks, fuel up your space ships, and remember: don't get too scared!

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Taking a page from the Book of Jason Voorhees, the third installment of the Critters franchise takes a trip to the big city! (Which city that is... is unclear).

This 1991 direct-to-video sequel sees the Crites hitching a ride on a family's RV into the city and causing mayhem inside a run down tenement building. A smaller budget means smaller locations and less Critter action, but it also means a much weaker script. Pete considers this the low point in the franchise, filled with shallow characters, atrociously weak humor, and a broad and directionless story.

Join us as we discuss sexist 90's d-bag characters, the horrors of shooting special effects with no budget for a safety team, and the beginning of the career of one of the biggest stars in Hollywood.

So gather the whole family, cook up a big meal, and remember: don't get too scared!

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Part 2 is always bigger and louder, and the Critters franchise is no exception!

This week, Pete takes us through the 1988 sequel, Critters 2: The Main Course. The Crites are back, and this time instead of terrorizing a single Kansas farm, they are taking over the entire town! Brad, Charlie, and the Alien Bounty Hunters are back with help from their fellow townsfolk. But the Critters are prepared, and they too have a few new tricks up their sleeve.

Join us as we discuss the value of healthy eating, the price of exotic European eggs, and how many Crites it takes to break down a door.

So make your favorite meal, bring plenty of snacks, and remember: don't get too scared!

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If you thought the Gremlins were bad news, wait until you get a load of... Critters!

It's another October Franchise Breakdown, and this year Pete is bringing us one of his childhood favorites with the Critters franchise! The first film from 1986 tells the story of a gang of escaped alien monsters known as Crites (hungry little furballs that eat anyone they meet) that make their way to a small Kansas farm town on Earth and begin causing chaos. They are pursued by shape-changing bounty hunters with loose trigger fingers and no fear of collateral damage.

Join us as we discuss surprisingly progressive feminism for an 80's film, the many delightful cameos of then-unknown stars, and why this makes a great double feature with Tremors!

So strap in for a horror franchise so good, it starts in space! And remember: don't get too scared!

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This week's movie has it all: romance, music, dancing, throat slitting, human pies!

This week Sarah sings us the song of Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street. This 2007 adaptation of the classic stage musical once again reunites director Tim Burton and actor Johnny Depp. Depp plays a man seeking revenge in 1800's England, who hides under the guise of a simple barber. With the help of his maniacal new friend (the always delightful Helena Bonham Carter), he kills his way through London while she bakes the victims into pies to hide the evidence.

Join us as we discuss trying to imagine Angela Lansbury murdering someone, how many Harry Potter alumni were cast in this film, and just how much we love Anthony Head.

So sharpen your razors, take a seat in the barber chair, and remember: don't get too scared!

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When there's something strange in your little hamlet, who you gonna call? Ghost Constables!

This week, Sarah rides with us to the 1999 Tim Burton film, Sleepy Hollow. This spooky retelling of the classic tale sees Johnny Depp as Ichabod Crane, a science obsessed inspector who gets called to investigate a murder and learns that magic may be more real than he imagined. A star studded cast livens up this dark and bloody gothic film that proved that Tim Burton could handle a true rated R experience.

Join us as we discuss other adaptations of Sleepy Hollow, how Star Wars is all over this film, and why you should never cast the (silent) Headless Horseman with someone who is known for their voice.

So light some candles, close all your windows, and make sure no one has cursed you to be hunted by a revenant. And as always: don't get too scared!

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If I had a nickel for every time Katie Holmes starred in a 90's teen horror film that was recut by the studio and brought down from an R rating to a PG-13... I would have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but its weird that it happened twice.

This week, Pete schools us on the 1999 film, Teaching Mrs. Tingle. The directorial debut of Kevin Williamson, this was an early screenplay of his that did not get picked up until after he blew up with Scream and Dawson's Creek. It tells the tale of three high school students who accidentally hold their mean history teacher hostage in her own house. A game of wits unfolds to see which party can manipulate and blackmail the other first. Can the kids save their academic careers, or will their prisoner get free and murder them all one by one?

Join us as we discuss classic horror cinema appreciation, proper medieval weapon handling, and underrated 90's music gems.

So sharpen your pencils, pull out those textbooks, and remember: don't get too scared!

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When the ghosts get tough, who ya gonna call? The pope's guy!

Sarah blesses us with this week's film, 2023's The Pope's Exorcist. Inspired by the real life priest with an awesome name (Gabriel Amorth) this movie details Rome's number one exorcist helping a young boy fight off possession from a demon. Amorth then uncovers a Vatican conspiracy while dealing with his own personal "demons", all while cracking jokes and kicking the devil in the ass.

Join us as we discuss the best ways to trick the devil, how to get Satanic insurance for your contracting jobs, and why it is so important to do proper research into ancient religious symbols before putting them into your movie.

So dust off your holy scrolls, say a few Hail Mary's, and remember: don't get too scared!

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"Let's Encyclopedia Brown this bitch!"

This week, Pete talks us through one of his favorite movies of all time, Stephen King's 1408. This 2007 film tells the story of a jaded horror author who checks in to the most haunted room in New York's Dolphin Hotel, only to find out that the stories are true, and he may never get out alive. Who will win? The stubborn alcoholic writer, or the infinite patience of a shapeless evil?

Join us as we discuss parallel dimensions inside mini-fridges, how to properly maintain an HVAC system, and what not to do when an ageless evil entity steals your Wifi password.

So put up the "do not disturb" sign, enjoy your complimentary chocolate, and as always: don't get too scared!

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It's based on a book, it's got a white woman solving a mystery, it features the teachings of 18th-century theologian Emanuel Swedenborg! It's the Netflix original, Things Seen and Heard!

Sarah takes us through this 2021 film (which takes places in the 80's) about a family moving into an old home in upstate New York. Weird things start happening, the husband doesn't believe the wife and is dismissive of her, and a town mystery is investigated with a good old séance. A tale as old as time.

Join us as we discuss "bas husband" tropes, why you should never lie about a job interview, and you should avoid sailing in stormy weather.

So grab a seat, open up your favorite art book or theological study, and remember: don't get too scared!