Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!

At the moment we’re in between seasons here on the show. But while we’re waiting for our next official season to begin, we thought this would be a great time to pull some of our favorite episodes out of the Girls Night archive. This is the perfect time to catch up on episodes you might have missed, or listen again to old favorites.

Today I’m chatting with my friend, Debra Fileta!

Debra is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and author of a new book called, Love in Every Season. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. I can’t wait for you to hear from her!

Especially because today we’re talking about a subject that is very near and dear to my heart. 

Today we’re talking about how to know if you’ve found “the one.” 

The reason I’m so excited about this episode is because this is a question I MAJORLY wrestled with when Carl and I were dating. This is also a question I get asked all the time by our Girls Night listeners. 

You're dating a guy, things are going well, but how do you know when things are going well enough for you to actually get married? How do you know if he’s “the one?”

For me personally, this was one of the most stressful, anxiety-ridden questions I’ve ever asked in my life. I know that’s not everybody’s story, but it was mine, and I know I’m not alone. 

So in this episode I ask Debra all of the questions I wish I could have asked back when Carl and I were dating — and I’m hoping that this episode brings some peace and clarity to anyone who really needs it right now. 
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Featured Episode: How to Know if Someone is “Your Person” (and What that Even Means!) — with Debra Fileta

Navigating Decisions & Transitions One Girls Night at a Time. Welcome to Girls Night, the go-to podcast for women in their Everything Era, that wildly confusing decade-ish where we have to make many of the most significant decisions of our lives all at the same time. (Career, marriage, motherhood, and more!) Thankfully, we don’t have to do it alone. The best girls nights aren’t just about eating pizza in sweatpants with your friends — they’re about problem solving and leaning into the collective wisdom of women, and that’s what this podcast is all about. Join host Stephanie May Wilson as she interviews some of the world’s wisest women on the topics that keep us up at night. You’ll walk away from each episode with both clarity and confidence — knowing what your next step is and also how to take it.

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Self-Improvement

I’m so excited about today’s episode.

Here’s the thing — we’ve all been there. We’ve all had days where it feels like our emotions are getting the best of us or our minds can’t stop racing. These moments are so frustrating because often we think, “I shouldn’t be feeling this way” — but still, we do! And these feelings have a way of impacting every facet of our lives — our relationships, our career, our body image and so much more! 

But, the truth is, it’s okay to feel our emotions, what matters is how we respond to them! 

Our guest for today’s episode is Dr. Alison Cook. Alison is a psychologist, podcast host, and the author of three books, including her newest book called, I Shouldn't Feel This Way: Name What’s Hard, Tame Your Guilt, and Transform Self-Sabotage into Brave Action. For 20 years, Alison has helped women, ministry leaders, couples, and families learn how to heal painful emotions, develop confidence from the inside out, forge healthy relationships, and fully live out their God-given potential.

One of my favorite parts of the episode was when Alison shared her strategy on how to “name, tame, and transform” our thoughts. I will be using this all of the time! 

Friends, my hope is that you leave this episode feeling like you have a better grasp on how to navigate your tricky emotions and have more compassion for yourself. 
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Girls Night #250: “I Shouldn’t Feel this Way” — How to Navigate your Big (and Conflicting!) Emotions! — with Dr. Alison Cook

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!

I’m so excited about today’s episode. Today you’ll hear the advice I WISH I would have had when I was single.

Today’s episode is going to look a little different than usual. If you’ve been around our Girls Night community for a while, you know that it’s girls only. (With the occasional exception of my husband Carl). Today, we’re breaking that rule — but I promise it’s for a really good reason!

Our guest for today’s episode is my long-time friend, Ryan Wekenman. Ryan and I met back in college at a campus ministry we were both a part of, but today he’s the teaching pastor at a church called Red Rocks Austin. He recently wrote an incredible book called, Single Today: Conquer Yesterday's Regrets, Ditch Tomorrow's Worries, and Thrive Right Where You Are.

In this episode, Ryan is sharing his journey as an unmarried pastor for over a decade. He has such a unique perspective on this topic and I knew we needed to have him on! Ryan is the REAL DEAL. 

He’ll talk us through some of the biggest struggles we all face when we’re single — “How do I respond to a relative who keeps nagging me about my relationship status?” “How do I stop comparing my timeline to the other people in my life?” “Can I experience intimacy even as a single person?” “Is there something wrong with me for wanting to be single?” or “Is there something wrong with me because I’m not married yet?” And that’s just the beginning! 

If you’re a single person in your twenties or thirties, I hope this episode will bring you so much encouragement and remind you that you’re not alone! 

Okay, ready? Let’s dive into my conversation with Ryan!

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Girls Night #247: The Advice I WISH I’d Heard When I was Single — with Ryan Wekenman

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!

I’m so excited about today’s episode. Today we’re talking about why your 20s & 30s are some of the most important years of your life and how you can make the most of them! 

To walk us through this, I invited none other than the twentysomethings expert herself, Dr. Meg Jay. Meg Jay is a clinical psychologist and author who specializes in twentysomethings. I read her book, The Defining Decade, about a decade ago, and it totally changed my life. And she actually has a new book releasing this week called, The Twentysomething Treatment which is about young adult mental health — I cannot wait for you to hear more about it! 

In our conversation, Meg is teaching us why the twentysomething (and thirtysomething) years are so critical in shaping who we are. Along with that, she’s sharing her research on the young adult mental health crisis in America and her best solutions for improving your mental health, and your life in general! 

My hope is that you’ll walk out of this episode feeling less alone knowing that it’s totally normal to struggle with life in your 20s or 30s, but also, feeling so equipped to take your next steps forward. You don’t have to do this alone!

Okay, you ready? Here’s my conversation with Meg! 
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Girls Night #246: Why your 20s & 30s are some of the most Important Years of your Life — with Dr. Meg Jay

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!

As you may know, I have a new book coming out soon called Create a Life You Love and in it I tackle what I call the Everything Era — that wildly confusing decade-ish where we have to make some of the most significant decisions of our lives, typically all at the same time.

I've spent the last 10 years wrestling with these big life decisions and the pressure that comes with them — and I've talked to countless women who are doing the same. But I didn't know it was a thing — actually a thing — until two years ago when I heard a statistic I will never, ever forget.

In a rare study of life-span development, researchers at Boston University and the University of Michigan found that 80% of our life’s most defining moments happen before we turn 35. In fact, the average woman makes the majority of her biggest life decisions in the decade between her 25th and 35th (ish) birthdays.

So… I wasn't exaggerating, it wasn't my imagination, this season of life is actually as big, and hard, and consequential as it feels. So that's when I started to dig. I needed more information. I wanted to know more about what's happening in us during these years, and what's happening around us.

I also started to wonder what these years have looked like for the generations of women who have gone before us, because I realized I didn't actually know.

I have learned SO MUCH as I’ve heard stories of women from past generations. The more I’ve learned about women’s history, the more I understand why our lives look the way they do today.

This is why I’m so excited to introduce you to today’s guest!

Our guest for today’s episode is my new friend, Sarah Gristwood. Sarah is a former film journalist and now writes books about women’s history. Her most recent is called, Secret Voices: A Year of Women’s Diaries. In it, she analyzes a collection of excerpts from women’s diaries, looking back over four centuries to discover how women’s experience—of men and children, sex and shopping, work and the natural world—has changed down the years. And, of course, how it hasn’t.

I LOVED this conversation, and I can’t wait for you to hear it.

Before we dive in, I wanted to read you just a little snippet of my new book, Create A Life You Love — because in it, I explain why learning about women’s history has meant so much to me.

“Recognizing the pressures women have been under throughout history helps me feel like I’m not alone. I’m part of a large sisterhood, and I’m honored to be.

This truth is especially helpful to me during times when I start to wonder if the pressure I’m feeling is imagined—if the expectations I’m sensing are really as heavy and forceful as they feel.

As I look back at the centuries of pressure and expectations and opinions about women’s lives and how they should spend them, I see that yes, this actually is as big as it feels. And that’s so validating. It helps me be kinder to myself as I navigate all of this. I hope it helps you too.”

“Not only is it helpful for me to know that this pressure isn’t new—that women have always had people breathing down their necks telling them what they should do and how they should live—but also, the more I find out about the expectations placed on women throughout history, the more I understand why some of the decisions I’m trying to make in my own life today feel so heavy.”

﻿You guys, Sarah is the best. I can’t wait for you to meet her. You ready? Let’s dive in. 
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Girls Night #245: Why Women’s History is Changing My Life — with Sarah Gristwood

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!

Today’s episode is going to be a little different than usual! A few weeks ago, my new friend, Jacqueline Genova, invited me to be a guest on her podcast called How to be Wellnstrong. We talked about all different types of transitions women face in their 20s and 30s — and we talked so much about dating and breakups and what I wish I could go back and tell myself in the midst of all of that.

I loved our conversation so much, I asked Jacqueline if I could share it here with you guys! She was so gracious to say yes and so that’s the episode you’ll hear today! Jacqueline is in the interview chair, and I’m answering the questions!

We’re going to be talking about…
How to heal from a hard breakup

What to do if your friend gets into a relationship or marriage before you do

How to be happy for your friends even when you’re still waiting

How to navigate the dating scene

Why you should give online dating another try

And that’s just the beginning!

I’m so excited to share this conversation with you! 
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Featured Episode: How to Know if Someone is “Your Person” (and What that Even Means!) — with Debra Fileta

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