Fighting For Joy

Today I am excited to release the first episode of a three-part series that I recorded with my husband Eric on the topic of marriage and ways that we can fight for joy IN marriage. Over the past 3 years I have asked numerous times about topic suggestions for the podcast - and over and over again, marriage is the #1 thing that you bring up. It’s a favorite topic for us, too, but its a huge topic! There is just so much to cover. Ultimately, we decided to narrow it down to 10 key things that we have learned through our 27 years of marriage (and 5 years of dating before that!). These are practical and theological truths that have helped us, instructed us, and given us hope through the ups and downs of marriage in this broken world.

If you are married, your relationship with your spouse is a huge part of your life…for better or worse. It has the potential to bless and bring great encouragement. It also has the potential to hurt and discourage your soul. This is why we need to talk about the challenges of marriage more, share the things we are learning, give each other hope, and encourage one another to keep fighting for joy within our marriages. Eric and I are far from experts and hope to keep learning and growing - but it has been really special thinking through these things and we loved preparing this series for you.

Fighting for joy in marriage can be really hard work, but it is important and meaningful work. We hope these conversations encourage and inspire you to keep going. The best news is that we have a big God who is always at work and He promises to help, sustain, comfort and provide for us every step of the way!

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy. Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

I’m so happy to introduce you to a special woman in our community who is known as “Mama Lu”. Her nickname points to the role that she plays in the lives of so many - mentoring, teaching, mothering, and encouraging. Her actual name is LuAnn Ruwe. She has been married to her husband Chris for 44 years. They have 7 children (plus 6 of them have brought spouses to the family) and 13 grandchildren. LuAnn is a retired nurse and is now in the catering business. So she brings a lot of experience, wisdom, and insight to the table and I was so grateful for the opportunity to sit and learn from her - and now I'm thrilled to share our conversation with you!

Even though LuAnn has experienced firsthand the brokenness of this world, she exudes an unbelievable amount of joy! LuAnn has one of the most beautiful and genuine smiles, her laugh is contagious, and she always seems to have a song in her heart. As we talk together on this episode today, you’ll quickly find out where her abundant joy comes from (spoiler alert: it comes from her deep love for Jesus!). God's work in her life has produced such beautiful fruit. Through many years of walking closely with Him, she has developed a sweet dependence on Him, she treasures His Word, trusts His promises, believes in the importance of staying in close community with other believers, and regarding our topic today, she has learned about the necessity, comfort, joy, and power of prayer. I hope as you listen you are spurred on in your own prayer life. Or maybe it will prompt you to start praying for the very first time. I love how practical LuAnn got and I think her insight will help and encourage you, as it did for me. And really, as we continue to talk through these many ways to fight for joy, I can’t think of many that top prayer!

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy. Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

Perfectionism. What comes to mind when you hear that word? For many people, trying to attain “perfection” here in this broken world leads to despair, extreme frustration, debilitating doubt, never feeling good enough, and constant comparison with others which leads to a deep discontentment that permeates the soul. It can feel almost maddening. Like carrying a weight around that is absolutely crushing. Yet, our culture can tend to glamorize it - think of the Lexus car commercial promoting the “pursuit of perfection”. Sometimes we wonder if our life would be better if we had MORE perfectionist tendencies. And to be honest, many perfectionists DO accomplish a lot…but at what cost?!? That’s the question that my guest today ended up asking herself after years of trying to accept nothing less than “perfection” in her life.

Today I’m joined by Sara Waddel, my cousin and dear friend. On this episode we talk about how harmful and damaging these tendencies can be when they take over. How quickly perfectionism can rob us of peace, freedom, contentment, and JOY. As Sara shares her story, you’ll be encouraged by her fight for joy in the struggle. God has been teaching her a lot and I’m grateful for her willingness to share so openly and honestly. I think you’ll especially be helped by some of the practical things that she implements into her daily life to fight against perfectionism.

There is so much joy to be found when we rest in Christ’s work, not our own…knowing that we are not accepted and loved by God because we do everything “perfectly” and never fail, but because as believers, Christ’s righteousness counts for us! And, we know that the Holy Spirit is producing good fruit in us that delights God. We don’t have to earn his love or our salvation. We don’t have to seek the love and approval of others - or find our value in doing things “better” than those around us. This is freeing and joy-producing!

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy. Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

Lament. Is that a word that you are familiar with? Before Jackson died, it wasn't a word that I thought much about. But in grief, the examples in Scripture of Biblical lament have really resonated with me. Lament IS releasing our emotions as we cry out to the Lord, but it goes further - it also includes asking for God's help to respond in trust and worship. Lament helps us focus on God’s character and promises while still acknowledging the pain and struggle.

My guest today, Molly Huffman, has experienced deep lament. And, by God's grace, she would say that it has been a key tool in her fight for JOY. This fight has been brutal and hard fought for Molly because she has suffered some terrible losses, one after another. But, although her story is heartbreaking, it is similtaneously encouraging. As Molly shares her story, she gives powerful and beautiful testimony of just how worthy God is to be trusted EVEN IN the midst of horrific circumstances. Even when your life and your dreams fall apart.

I'm grateful for this conversation with my friend Molly and I hope it leaves you hopeful and encouraged.

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy. Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

Name the top 10 people who have had a transformative influence on your life! One of those people for me is my guest today, Pastor Don Solin. Don currently pastors a church in Ohio and is a certified life coach, but many years ago he was my high school youth pastor. In the midst of such tender years of growth and struggle, he and his wife Marcie loved on us crazy teenagers in such meaningful ways. Don was one of the first people who really pushed me and challenged me to make my faith my own and to wholeheartedly follow the Lord. And, its not an exaggeration to say that his encouragement to go to Wheaton College affected the whole trajectory of my life. He also knows how to make me laugh, which you'll hear...and I've always admired his love for people and his desire to be a good question-asker and thoughtful listener. I am so grateful for the ways that Don’s mentoring and friendship grew my faith and set the foundation in some key ways for the person that I am today.

Now, all this being said, Don’s own journey of faith, and seeking to be loved and accepted by God instead of people, has been a tough, messy one…one that has included alcoholism, performance religion, and depression. When I asked him about a title for this episode, he somewhat jokingly suggested "Fighting for Joy With a Whole Lot of Issues". :) Oh how thankful we can be for a God that is big enough to carry us through what ever struggles we face, and meet us with sufficient grace and mercy. I can’t wait for you to hear Don's story today! It is so hopeful and I know you will be encouraged by the ways that God has taught him to live by faith - not by performing, keeping up an image, or striving to meet other people’s standards. Living honestly and authentically has helped him to experience true joy and he is passionate about helping others experience this freedom and joy as well.

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy. Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

Are you in the midst of a "waiting season"? Maybe your life doesn't look like you thought it would. Or you find yourself in the middle of really difficult circumstances that won't be changing anytime soon...or ever. You long for a different job. A different health journey. A spouse. A family. A different ending. A different story. Is there joy to be found in these longings? Can we experience hope and peace while we wait for God's plans to unfold? When we don't understand what He is doing? My guest today, Cathy DelSenno, speaks directly to these questions (spoiler alert, the answer is YES!) and shares her story of fighting for joy through some really hard things like miscarriage, major surgeries, divorce, loneliness, and anxiety. In many ways Cathy is still in the thick of things, still waiting, still fighting hard for contentment and joy, but I know you will be so blessed by the beautiful things that she is learning in the middle of it all...rich things about God's love and care, about the comfort of His Word, the power of prayer, the need for community, the process of forgiveness, and how transforming gratitude can be!

Cathy lives in Omaha, has 4 amazing kids, works at a local hospital, and has headed back to school. She is spinning a lot of plates in life right now but does it with grace and wisdom, aiming to just do "the next right thing". Over the past couple of years, she has grown to become a dear friend to me and I always walk away from our time together feeling encouraged, spurred on, and blessed. I'm sure you're going to feel the same way after hearing her insight today!

Let’s face it, life in this world of ours is such a “both/and"! It can be beautiful and exciting…AND...it can be hard, painful, and disappointing - sometimes all at the same time! Thankfully, we don’t have to wait for our struggles to end or our circumstances to change before we can experience joy. And hope. And peace. It is possible to find these things right in the messy middle! We can experience pain AND peace. Chaos AND comfort. Grief AND hope. Sadness AND joy. Isn't this hopeful?!?! Even in the hard, we can experience abounding JOY!

My guest today is a great example of this. I’m so excited to welcome my friend Shelly Waltz to the podcast. Shelly and I got connected through Instagram and her voice on social media is one of light, beauty, and joy. Shelly calls herself "Little Ms. Magnolia" and says that she fights for joy by embracing ordinary goodness. She is a self-proclaimed "steel magnolia" who is "living out her Plan B with her 4 beautiful babes"!

On today's episode we talk about things like gratitude, contentment, creating a home that is a refuge, turning 50, and looking for beauty in the ordinary things that are all around us! I’m grateful for Shelly's willingness to share a little bit of her story and how she has learned to fight for joy after her life took an unexpected and hard turn. I know you will be blessed by her wisdom and beautiful perspective.

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy . Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

On this episode my husband Eric and I answer some of your listener questions!

We recorded our first Q & A episode last season and you loved it so much that we wanted to do another one for you. Thank you for submitting questions. It was a joy to share and we hope that you are encouraged.

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy . Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

Today we are kicking off Season 3! I’m grateful to get back to sharing stories of fighting for joy and can't wait to tell you about the exciting things that I have planned for the podcast over the next few months. On this episode, my favorite podcast guest, my husband Eric, is joining me to recap a few things from Season 2 as well as help me to introduce what is coming up in Season 3.

*The Fighting for Joy Podcast is sponsored by Faithful Counseling, an online Christian counseling service that pairs you with a professional licensed therapist who will combine Biblical wisdom with their clinical expertise in mental health to help you address your unique situation. As a Fighting for Joy listener, you can receive 10% off at: faithfulcounseling.com/fightingforjoy. Quality counseling is a worthy investment and can be such a powerful tool in the fight for joy!

Today I am wrapping up Season 2 of the podcast with a special episode that is dedicated to my mom, Virginia Nelson. She went to be with the Lord on Sunday, June 7th, 2020. Her life was a shining example of what it looks like to fight for joy in the midst of this broken world. Her persevering faith carried her through each trial that she faced and her long relationship with Jesus allowed her to sing and smile through suffering. The joy of the Lord truly was her strength and Romans 12:12 is how she lived - “Joyful in hope. Patient in trials. Constant in prayer.” May her story encourage you to keep fighting for joy yourself - to keep running to the Lord and trusting His promises no matter what you have to face in life.