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Finding Me: The Power of Being Single and Sober
When I think about it, alcohol shaped many aspects of my past relationships—starting with how I entered them. From first dates to emotional confessions, alcohol was always there, acting as a social lubricant, a confidence booster, and, often, a crutch. It blurred the lines between genuine connection and the convenience of shared intoxication. Many of my first social, emotional, and even physical experiences were steeped in alcohol, shaping not only how I saw others but also how I saw myself.
Looking back now, through the clarity of sobriety, I can see how alcohol didn’t just influence the dynamics of those relationships—it influenced my perception of love and what I thought I deserved. It allowed me to stay in situations where I was settling, mistaking temporary highs for lasting intimacy. Without it, I’m beginning to understand what real love looks like, starting with the love I show myself.
I reflect on the clarity sobriety brings, the patterns I never noticed before, and the beauty of finally choosing to want more for myself.
Key Takeaways:
How alcohol shapes the dating culture, from first dates to deep emotional connections.
The ways alcohol can create a false sense of intimacy, masking red flags and emotional disconnect.
Relearning love and self-worth through sobriety, and understanding the kind of connection we truly deserve.
Why our earliest experiences with alcohol and relationships can set the tone for patterns we carry into adulthood—and how we can break free from them.
Check out my book, Struck Inside Out: Essays, Meditations, and Poetry to Help You Heal Heartbreak, Embrace Change, and Love Yourself: https://www.amazon.com/Struck-Inside-Out-Meditations-Heartbreak/dp/B0BP4D8MTT
Struck Inside Out Audiobook: https://www.amazon.com/Struck-Inside-Out-Meditations-Heartbreak/dp/B0CPYW3JPM/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
Spotify Writing Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7BRDzK21DbrIEadQdjoPjR?si=0f9ec1aaddfd4e52
Follow Danielle:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/struckinsideout
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@struckinsideout?_t=8jItIyuhHHa&_r=1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/danielle-bertoli-6015889b/
Struck Inside Out Merch: https://www.struckinsideout.com/shop
Brand Partnerships: https://www.struckinsideout.com/partnerships
Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.struckinsideout.com/subscribe
Insight Timer Meditations: https://insighttimer.com/daniellebertoli
Audio Producer: Owen Kelly
Follow Owen on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mixedbyowen_?igsh=ZzB1ZWdoOGd1aTV3
View all episodes
By Danielle Bertoli
5
1818 ratings
When I think about it, alcohol shaped many aspects of my past relationships—starting with how I entered them. From first dates to emotional confessions, alcohol was always there, acting as a social lubricant, a confidence booster, and, often, a crutch. It blurred the lines between genuine connection and the convenience of shared intoxication. Many of my first social, emotional, and even physical experiences were steeped in alcohol, shaping not only how I saw others but also how I saw myself.
Looking back now, through the clarity of sobriety, I can see how alcohol didn’t just influence the dynamics of those relationships—it influenced my perception of love and what I thought I deserved. It allowed me to stay in situations where I was settling, mistaking temporary highs for lasting intimacy. Without it, I’m beginning to understand what real love looks like, starting with the love I show myself.
I reflect on the clarity sobriety brings, the patterns I never noticed before, and the beauty of finally choosing to want more for myself.
Key Takeaways:
How alcohol shapes the dating culture, from first dates to deep emotional connections.
The ways alcohol can create a false sense of intimacy, masking red flags and emotional disconnect.
Relearning love and self-worth through sobriety, and understanding the kind of connection we truly deserve.
Why our earliest experiences with alcohol and relationships can set the tone for patterns we carry into adulthood—and how we can break free from them.
Check out my book, Struck Inside Out: Essays, Meditations, and Poetry to Help You Heal Heartbreak, Embrace Change, and Love Yourself: https://www.amazon.com/Struck-Inside-Out-Meditations-Heartbreak/dp/B0BP4D8MTT
Struck Inside Out Audiobook: https://www.amazon.com/Struck-Inside-Out-Meditations-Heartbreak/dp/B0CPYW3JPM/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
Spotify Writing Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7BRDzK21DbrIEadQdjoPjR?si=0f9ec1aaddfd4e52
Follow Danielle:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/struckinsideout
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@struckinsideout?_t=8jItIyuhHHa&_r=1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/danielle-bertoli-6015889b/
Struck Inside Out Merch: https://www.struckinsideout.com/shop
Brand Partnerships: https://www.struckinsideout.com/partnerships
Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.struckinsideout.com/subscribe
Insight Timer Meditations: https://insighttimer.com/daniellebertoli
Audio Producer: Owen Kelly
Follow Owen on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mixedbyowen_?igsh=ZzB1ZWdoOGd1aTV3