I first met Mayer Harris a little over two years ago and was intrigued by his knowledge of the Bible and its history as well as how it relates to other spiritual practices.  He is one of the nicest and most caring people I've ever met, and embodies the purpose of this podcast by naturally diving into deeper topics of conversation that have more significance to life and living.  If you want to know more about him, visit his coaching site https://www.personalpeace.me/ 

There have been many flawed leaders, sports heroes and other famous people in history.  What makes them flawed?  Who or what do we have more of a tendency to forgive, and why?  Do money, power and fame cause more people to become corrupt, or is it just easier for them to be who they already are? These are some of the things we discuss on this episode. 

I'll admit it.  I am a dreamer and I often make lofty goals and set idealistic expectations that are likely out of reach. In my mind I gravitate toward huge success stories of self-made billionaires. I'm sure I'm not alone in that.

There is a whole industry of people who are building wealth by promoting products and services that cater to that same desire - to catapult someone from obscurity to legendary status. Ploys to develop mastery, to be a high performer, to 10x your growth or to max out your life are plentiful. I, too, have consumed content from many of these people and programs as well. This is in no way a condemnation of them or anyone's desire for success, because I believe their intent is good.

However, even among many of these people, they will share bits of things that have actually improved the quality of their lives the most, and by and large they don't involve the massive accumulation of wealth.  Usually they have to do with things like service, faith, connection, meditative or contemplative practices and other contributing lifestyle enhancements. I have become someone who now looks for patterns and similarities in messages, sort of decoding things through these perceptions and identifying repeat melodies even among otherwise very different songs.

What I have found is that the chasing of that big jump - in anything - is very rarely what actually works. Rather, it is an accumulation of incremental changes or improvements that surmount to those sought-after ideals in life.

What meaning can be derived from past experiences?  How can we use them to move forward in life?  Doing this can be a powerful exercise.  Similarly, how can we assess our purpose for actions in the future?

From the time we were kids through today, we are constantly receiving messages from external sources of how we're supposed to look, what we're supposed to like and who we're supposed to be.  Maybe it's time to look within ourselves to examine our values of who we really want to be, and to then display those outwardly instead. We can choose our own identities and shed any labels that don't really define us.

Too often in life we fall into the trap of placing our happiness on the attainment of a specific goal, object or result.   We attach our self worth to specific outcomes and if it doesn't turn out exactly that way, we allow ourselves to feel down, rather than appreciating the experience, learning from it or finding a suitable substitute.  Understanding how to avoid unhealthy attachment in life can be incredibly liberating, and actually help us achieve more of what we really want.

Real forgiveness is liberating, and sometimes people have misconceptions about what it means.  A great resource that has helped me is the book by  Desmond Tutu called The Book of Forgiving:  The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World.  Are there things that you've held on to that could be let go through forgiveness?  

Our wonderful county needs an upgrade to our two party political system.  It is not an accurate representation of Americans. The us vs. them attitude isn't helping us and a lot of time, money and attention is wasted on battling each other rather than trying to move forward as a collective.  An overhaul of the Electoral College and making it easier for more parties to be included in the political process would be two ways our system could be improved.

We all could benefit from more kindness in the world. The givers and receivers are both rewarded, and there is even some great scientific research to support the benefits. In short, kindness isn't just fluff.

How can you be kinder today?

Susan Cain's book "Quiet - The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" was a revelation for me when it came out a few years ago. As a self confessed introvert, it helped me to understand more about myself as well as others, especially those closest to me.

I think it is important to help identify the situations and environments that we thrive in, and also to balance those out with other experiences as well.