FirstAdam: A Transparent Podcast for Men

Let’s be honest, fellas…

The "Sears" Catalog. That's where it started. Flipping through the pages and then I came to the section advertising women in bras and panties. I was hooked. (you can't tell me you didn't look at that catalog also :) )

We talk a big game. We serve. We lead. We pray. 
But underneath all that… there’s a secret that no one’s really talking about:

PORN.

Yeah, we said porn — because pretending it’s not a problem hasn’t helped anyone. Porn is a billion-dollar beast that’s devouring men, wrecking marriages, and keeping people locked in cycles of guilt, isolation, and fake freedom.

It’s the addiction no one sees, the sin nobody wants to admit but it’s everywhere. It’s in our men’s groups. It’s in our marriages. And it’s tearing men apart from the inside out quietly, secretly. It’s rewiring brains, suffocating purpose, and keeping good men stuck in shame, secrecy, and isolation. It’s the drug no one wants to admit they’re hooked on.
 It’s the secret battle that’s stealing our strength, numbing our souls, and quietly wrecking everything we care about — our marriages, our minds, our manhood, and our walk with God.

This episode? We’re done hiding. We’re dragging this thing into the light where it loses its power. No shame. No fake masks. Real stories, and the truth that Jesus came to set men free, not just forgiven, but free. We’re talking about why so many men are hooked, what it’s really doing beneath the surface, and how you can start fighting back with honesty, brotherhood, and the power of God.

Join us as we invite a guest to share his journey about coming out from hiding.

Romans 12:2 "Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Alright fellas, welcome to Part 2 of letting our wives take the mic and speak truth into what it really means to be a father. We're cutting through the noise and getting straight to the heart of it: what do wives actually want from us, not just as husbands, but as dads?

This isn’t about being the guy who occasionally shows up. It’s about being the kind of father who earns respect at home, builds real trust with his kids, and makes his wife feel like she’s not parenting solo. No cape required. Just consistency, presence, and purpose.

We’re not guessing here, we’ve handed the mic to our wives. What do they wish we’d do more of? What drives them crazy? What actually helps them feel supported?

We’ll dive into emotional leadership, daily effort, and the big difference between saying “I’ve got this” and actually backing it up with action. No guilt trips, just real talk, real growth, and a chance to get better at one of the most important jobs you’ll ever have.

Let’s get into it.

It's FatHER's Day.

Let’s be real: we all want to be good dads. But just showing up? That’s not enough. Our wives—your wife—wants you to lead, protect, and serve the family like the man God’s called you to be. And that means stepping up, being present, and leading with strength, wisdom, and a whole lot of humility.

It's no secret that the role of a dad is one of the most important in a family. But sometimes, the expectations and the desires of a wife in this area aren’t always clear—or they get lost in the busyness of life. So we decided to ask our wives to join us as we are talking about how husbands can show up as the dads their wives need, not just the dads their kids want.

A FirstAdam first, we invited our wives to take over the podcast and share about what they want in a father for the kids. Whether it’s leading in prayer, being present, or just being a little less “fix-it” and a little more “listen.” We're talking about the things that matter to your wife, and how you can be the kind of dad that honors God and serves your family well.

Today, we’re diving into the stuff that matters: Are you leading your family spiritually, taking responsibility, and being the kind of father your wife can count on? Spoiler alert: it’s not about being perfect but present.

The qualities of a villain...Which Villain do you play?

Control Freak – Wants to dominate conversations, relationships, environments.

Emotionally Withholding – Uses silence, apathy, or detachment as weapons.

Toxic Stoicism – Refuses to feel or express emotion; mocks others who do.

Power-Hungry – Will do anything (lie, cheat, step on others) to climb the ladder.

Entitlement – Believes the world owes him success, love, sex, or admiration.

Manipulative – Twists the truth and uses others to achieve their goals.

Narcissistic – Obsessed with their own power, image, or greatness.

Insecure – Deep-rooted fears masked by aggression or pride.

Believes they’re right – Justifies evil with twisted logic.

Every man wants to be the hero. But what happens when the biggest battle isn’t out there—it’s inside? In this episode, we’re talking about the anti-hero—not the polished, perfect guy, but the one who’s rough around the edges, wrestling with his own shadow.

Let’s be real—sometimes we sabotage our own story. The part of us that plays it safe when we should step up. The part that hides behind sarcasm, success, or silence. The part that sabotages our own relationships, faith, and future. We talk a lot about heroes—but what if the person holding us back most... is us? Pride, fear, anger, addiction, passivity... they sneak in and turn us into the villain in our own lives, relationships, and faith. But here’s the good news: even anti-heroes can be redeemed. God isn’t looking for flawless men—He’s calling honest ones. Men who will face their failures, take responsibility, and rise anyway.

If you’ve ever looked in the mirror and thought, “I’m the problem,”—you’re not alone. This episode is your invitation to step out of the shadows and back into life.

You know exactly what “tapping out” looks like. It’s when a fighter hits the mat or taps their opponent, signaling they’re done. No more. They’ve reached their limit, and if they keep going, they’ll break.

But let me ask you: Would you have blamed Jesus for tapping out?

I mean, think about it—He went through more than we could ever imagine. Because let’s be honest—He could have. When the weight of the cross became unbearable… He could’ve said, “I’m done.”

When betrayal cut deep, He could’ve quit.

When they beat Him, mocked Him, and the crowd turned their back on Him—He could’ve walked away. And who would have blamed Him?

But here’s the thing—this isn’t about weakness. It’s not about failure. It’s about reaching the edge. That moment when you’ve carried more than you should, and your body, your mind, your soul finally says, “Enough.”

Every man has been there. How many of us have whispered to ourselves, “I’m done.”

But here’s where it changes—Jesus didn’t say “I am finished.” He said, “It is finished.”

There’s a huge difference.

“It is finished” = Purpose fulfilled. Power in the completion.

“I am finished” = A person overwhelmed, a cry for help or release.

One is a statement of triumph. The other is a moment of surrender.

Too many men are walking around, silently carrying the weight of the world, whispering, “I’m finished.”

“I can’t keep going.”

“I have nothing left.”

But listen—when Jesus hung on that cross and declared “It is finished,” He wasn’t giving up. It wasn’t a cry of defeat. It was a shout of victory.

It wasn’t weakness; it was completion.

Jesus didn’t tap out. He followed through.

He didn’t say, “I am finished”— because He wasn’t. And neither are you.

You may feel tired.

You may feel broken.

You may even feel like tapping out.

But when you’re at the edge, don’t declare “I am finished.”

Instead, remember: What Jesus finished on the cross means you don’t have to live defeated.

You might feel empty, but you are not done.

You might feel wounded, but you are not worthless.

You might feel tired, but in Christ, you are still standing.

Tetelestai… IT IS FINISHED.

Alright, fellas—imagine this. You fire up your favorite game, dive into a new world, and boom—there they are: the NPCs. The shopkeeper trying to sell you some overpriced gear, the quest giver spitting out the same old scripted lines, the random townsfolk just cluttering up the place, and the linemen who won’t let you play. You go through the motions, grab what you need, and keep moving—because, honestly, they’re just background noise in your story.

But here’s the kicker: a lot of guys are treating their real lives the same way. Treating people—friends, coworkers, even potential partners—like NPCs instead of real, complex individuals.

Think about it—ever had a day where you barely notice the people around you? The barista handing you your coffee, the guy working the front desk at your gym, the coworkers you don’t bother to truly engage with? Your wife and kids? Yeah, that one stings a bit. It’s like they’re just there to play a role—nothing more, nothing less. It’s as if their only purpose is to serve you, not as people with their own stories, struggles, and goals. And here’s the thing—many guys fall into this without even realizing it.

But here’s the hard truth—treating people like NPCs? It has real consequences. It isolates you. If all you see are tools or background characters, you miss out on the chance for real, meaningful relationships. Sure, you might be crushing it in your career, fitness, or side hustles—but are you actually connecting with anyone? The more you treat people like they’re just filling a role in your life, the harder it becomes to build real bonds.

On this episode, we’re diving into why the NPC mindset happens, how it messes with your relationships, and most importantly—how to break out of it. We’ll explore how to shift from a “What can I get from this person?” mentality to a “How can I connect with this person?” mindset. It might seem small, but that switch? It changes everything.

I know what you’re thinking: “Why should I waste my time listening to a podcast about waiting? I’ve got things to do!”

And trust me, I get it. As guys, we’re built to fix, hustle, and get things done. But what happens when God says, “Not yet”? Suddenly, we find ourselves in the most uncomfortable of places—waiting. How many of us wait for answers, for clarity, and sometimes for that thing we’re hoping and praying for, even though we’d rather be doing anything else.

As men, we’re often taught to be the ones who act, who take charge, and who make things happen. Waiting can feel like a waste of time or even a sign of weakness. But what if waiting isn’t just something we have to endure? What if it’s a powerful season of growth, refinement, and preparation? You see when it comes to God’s timing, suddenly we’re all in the waiting room, hoping that “divine intervention” happens on our schedule. Spoiler alert: it usually doesn’t.

In this episode, we’re going to be honest about what it really means to wait on God. Why does it often feel like He’s taking His sweet time? How can we stay faithful when the answer feels slow in coming? And, maybe most importantly, how do we find peace in the waiting. So what are you waiting on God for....maybe He is waiting on you...

Every man has a Canaan. Maybe it’s an addiction. A toxic habit. A relationship that should have ended years ago. An anger that simmers just below the surface, waiting for the right moment to explode. The problem is, we don’t always recognize these things for what they are. Or worse—we recognize them, but we let them live.

If you know the story, Canaan was the cursed grandson of Noah. But today, we’re not just talking about biblical history. We’re talking about the Canaan that exists in our lives—those things that should have been eliminated, cut off, or confronted, but were allowed to live and grow. And when we don’t kill Canaan, Canaan comes back to kill us.

Every time we refuse to kill what’s killing us, we pay a price. What price are you paying?

When we think of an inauguration, we often picture grand ceremonies and political transitions—but there’s another kind of inauguration that shapes who we are as men. Life’s milestones—whether it's becoming a father, stepping into a new career, or embracing a new chapter of personal growth—each come with their own “inaugurations.” These moments of transformation are as powerful as they are pivotal, marking shifts in identity, responsibility, and purpose.

An inauguration can also be defined as a shift in power or authority. For men, it’s called the Inauguration of Restoration. When we give power and authority back to God. That’s the promise found in Isaiah 61:7. "Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance; and so you will inherit a double portion in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours."

This verse speaks directly to those who have experienced shame, disgrace, and suffering. The promise here is of restoration—where those who have endured humiliation or hardship will be honored and elevated. "Instead of your shame, you will receive a double portion" indicates a reversal of fortunes, where past suffering will be replaced with abundance and blessing.

God's heart is to bless His people with more than they can imagine, offering healing, restoration, and an everlasting joy that comes from His presence. For anyone who feels that life has left them with nothing but disgrace, it is a reminder that God is in the business of redemption—and His restoration will far exceed the original losses.

Perhaps this is the year for your Inauguration of Restoration.

The rearview mirror isn’t just a tool for checking what's behind you; it’s a way to measure distance, to see how far you’ve traveled. Every glance is a reminder of battles fought, roads you’ve conquered, and mistakes made along the way. You see the scars, the victories, and the quiet moments of growth that no one else saw. Yet, there’s something unspoken about looking back that’s deeper than just memories—it’s about checking the road you’ve traveled for signs of what’s next.

Listen, it’s okay to look back for a moment. The past is a part of you. But it doesn’t get to decide where you go from here. You know there are many times I have had to look back in order to move forward. I need to be reminded of God’s faithfulness to have the strength and the courage to face the road ahead.

Before we make New Year’s resolutions, perhaps we need to look in the rearview mirror of this past year to see where we have had victories and where God was so gracious. You see, New Year's resolutions for men aren’t just about hitting the gym or ticking off the usual list of “self-improvements.” New Year’s resolutions carry a weight that goes beyond self-improvement—they’re an opportunity to realign, to step into a year with purpose that echoes the teachings of Christ. It’s not just about setting goals, but about setting the right ones: to love deeper, serve more faithfully, and lead with humility.

This year, it’s about growth, yes, but not the kind you can measure in pounds or numbers alone. It’s about becoming the man you are designed to be—the one who knows when to hustle and when to rest, when to speak up and when to listen, when to take risks, and when to double down on what matters. It’s not about perfection, but progress—pushing forward with eyes open to the journey God has for you.

So I want to encourage you, before you move forward, look back. See the victories of last year and let them be the symbol of God’s work in you. God always accomplishes his Resolutions. Remember, “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6