For All Abilities

In this episode, I interview Allie Mason. We discuss the challenge of her diagnosis of autism while she was working on a graduate degree. We also talk about how she has navigated school and work with the diagnosis. To connect with Allie, please follow her on LinkedIn (Allie Mason), on Instagram at whensouthmetnorth and on Facebook at Where Allie Writes.

I am talking in this episode with Anvita Jain about her journey with generalized anxiety and how she navigates the workplace as a human resources professional. Thanks for listening to For All Abilities today! Share the podcast with your friends, they'll thank you for it! Follow Betsy on Social Media Twitter: https://twitter.com/BetsyFurler Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/forallabilities Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/forallabilities LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/betsy-furler Join our newsletter or find out more about our software and services for employers: http://www.forallabilities.com

In this episode, I interview Tim Irr, Anchor at WSAZ-TV in West Virginia. We discuss the challenges of his ADHD. Tim talks about his childhood and the challenges he faced in the classroom. He discusses how he ended up in television news and how it is the perfect fit for his strengths. Read more about Tim here. To connect with Tim, please follow him on LinkedIn, email him at [email protected], or connect on Twitter. Thanks for listening to For All Abilities today! Share the podcast with your friends, they'll thank you for it! Follow Betsy on Social Media Twitter: https://twitter.com/BetsyFurler Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/forallabilities Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/forallabilities LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/betsy-furler Join our newsletter or find out more about our software and services for employers: http://www.forallabilities.com

For this episode, we interviewed Cassidy Hooper about living with Turner Syndrome.

Betsy Furler 0:05 Welcome to for all abilities, the podcast. This is your host, Betsy Furler. The aim of this podcast is to highlight the amazing things people with ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences and autism are doing to improve our world. Have a listen to for all abilities, the podcast, and please subscribe on whatever podcast app you're listening to us on. Welcome back to for all abilities, the podcast. This is your host, Betsy Furler. And I'm back here today to talk to yet another amazing person with Nord neurodiversity, and he's going to talk about her life and how she's using her skills as a person with autism to make a difference in this world. So well show Cassidy Hooper, how are you? Cassidy Hooper 1:00 I'm good. How are you better see the sunrise, your podcast? Yes. So Betsy Furler 1:05 I'm so excited to have you. So why don't you introduce yourself real quick to our audience? Cassidy Hooper 1:11 Yes, of course. So I'm Cassidy Hooper. First, I'm from North East Mississippi. And I was diagnosed with a rare genetic condition called Turner Syndrome. When I was nine days old, and at around 17 years old, I was diagnosed with Asperger syndrome, a form of autism. And as far as neuro, neuro diversity, and what I do for the autism community is I do some advocacy work for the art of North East Mississippi. I am the community navigator for the autism now division within the ark. And um, yeah, so that's a little bit about me. Betsy Furler 1:57 So what were you like as a little girl? What do you remember about your childhood? I guess, you your diagnosis you knew of when you were little was Turner Syndrome? Cassidy Hooper 2:07 Yes. Um, well, as a child, I was always really sick. Um, but I was in the hospital for a while. But, um, I didn't walk until I was around like 19 months. And so yeah, that's, that's pretty much all I know, for my childhood. Um, I was pretty much sick. Throughout. Betsy Furler 2:38 What about school? Did you enjoy going to school? Cassidy Hooper 2:41 Yeah, um, for me, it was hard to always stay to myself most of the time. I didn't really connect with the other, my peers, um, with other kids? Very much. I just stayed to myself most of the time, but I think I've gotten better socially, as I've gotten older. Um, so yeah. Betsy Furler 3:08 What about in high school did you do in? Were you in special ed classes? Or were you in general ed classes? Cassidy Hooper 3:14 general ed? Oh, good. Okay. Good. Betsy Furler 3:17 And in high school, did you do band or any extracurricular activities? Or did you pretty much just stay with the academic classes? Cassidy Hooper 3:26 I stayed with the academic classes pretty much my entire high school career. Betsy Furler 3:33 Did you what kind of grades did you make? Did you do okay, or was it hard for you? Cassidy Hooper 3:38 Yeah, I did pretty good. Um, I was actually, when I graduated high school. I was for highest ranking in my class with honors when I graduated high school, so Unknown Speaker 3:52 I, yeah, he got really well. Cassidy Hooper 3:55 Yeah. So that's cool. Yeah. What Unknown Speaker 3:59 did you do after high school? Cassidy Hooper 4:02 Well, I went to a local community college, but it didn't work out. So I'm now currently not going to college anymore. So yeah, it didn't work out. Because no, I had to take a math elective. And that's my worst subject. I had visual spatial awareness issues. So math was really a struggle for me. And I had to take college algebra. So yeah, yeah. So it was difficult. So that college wasn't for me. So I was drew and but yeah, Betsy Furler 4:46 yeah, college is not for everybody, right, and doesn't necessarily even give us the skills we need. So what have How did you have you had any other jobs besides the job at the arc that you're currently doing? Cassidy Hooper 5:00 Well, I, I went to rehab, called Building words. But that didn't work out either. So it wasn't a good fit for me. So Betsy Furler 5:15 what kind of jobs did they have you doing Cassidy Hooper 5:17 over there? Why would like woodworking and things like that, like factory work? Betsy Furler 5:24 probably wasn't good for somebody with visual spatial challenges either, right? Cassidy Hooper 5:31 Yeah, exactly. Betsy Furler 5:32 Doesn't sound like a good, good fit for your strengths. Cassidy Hooper 5:36 Yes, exactly. Unknown Speaker 5:39 So how did you come up with the arc? Cassidy Hooper 5:42 Um, I got involved, I connected with the president Cheryl file zone of the arc of Northeast Mississippi chapter locally here. And she, we met, and she just thought that would be a good fit to volunteer at the art as the community navigator. So right now it's a volunteer position. But it's awesome to know advocate for individuals with autism. As someone with autism, I think it's really important to have that experience and to mentor other individuals with autism. So that's been great. Yeah, Betsy Furler 6:35 I agree. Because they're things that you don't know. Unless you've lived it yourself. Cassidy Hooper 6:41 Yes, absolutely. Betsy Furler 6:43 So tell me what kind of things do you do for your Do you call them clients are? What do you call the people that you work with? Cassidy Hooper 6:52 No, no. Um, well, right now, because of the pandemic, it's hard to get the programming going for this division? Uh, huh. No, with the pandemic and all. So we're trying to do some fundraising and things like that to get it going. And, yeah, so it's been tough, you know, with the pandemic, but we're trying to get it going. And, yeah, Betsy Furler 7:22 that's amazing. So what is your dream for what you would like to do in the future? Cassidy Hooper 7:30 for the future, I would like to become a mentor for other individuals with autism. And just, you know, know that they're not alone. And they can be any time they want to be. They can be, they can have a job, they can do anything they want to do in our lives. And autism shouldn't stop them from living our life. Betsy Furler 8:01 That's awesome. So what else do you like to do? What do you like to do for fun? Cassidy Hooper 8:07 Fun, I like listening to music and watching TV and movies and things like that. Yeah. What's your what's? Betsy Furler 8:17 What's your favorite TV show right now? Cassidy Hooper 8:20 I love the Big Bang Theory. And I love the good doctor. Betsy Furler 8:27 I like I really like the big bang theory. I've only seen a couple of episodes of the good doctor, but I really big bang theory. Cassidy Hooper 8:35 Yeah, Betsy Furler 8:36 I did a I did a TED talk just the other day on using our strengths and our differences as our superpowers. And I talked about people who were to he are twice exceptional, who have a cognitive difference or disability as well as academic giftedness. And when I was memorizing, memorizing my speech, I had some pictures that I was looking at to try to help me remember, you know, the different areas of the speech. And I used a picture of Sheldon for that too. Cassidy Hooper 9:04 He Yeah. Betsy Furler Yeah. And so what, um, you said you want to do advocacy, advocacy for people with autism in the future for your work or continue that because that's what you're what you're working on right now. And what do you think your strengths are in the workforce? Because sounds like he made great grades. And so you know, what, what do you think your strengths are that you can bring? Bring to an organization? Cassidy Hooper 9:37 I Yes, well, um, you know, I'm really good on and resources. I'm a very big researcher, and paying attention to detail like I'm very detail oriented. Yeah, and so yeah, I think that will be really awesome for workforce? Betsy Furler 10:01 Absolutely, yeah, those are skills that a lot of people don't have or the or they have no interest in it, you know? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think I really believe everybody needs to find what they do well, and then figure out a job that can use those skills because that way you're happier. And the people that you work for happier. Yeah, we're all happier when we're using our strengths. Cassidy Hooper 10:24 Yes, absolutely. Betsy Furler 10:26 Not having to do something that's difficult and, you know, not built on what we like to do and what we do well. Yeah, well, Cassidy this has been awesome. I'm I think our my audience is going to really appreciate hearing from you and they might want to connect with you. How could people connect with you if in the future? Cassidy Hooper 10:47 Yes, so I have a Facebook Cassidy Hooper. See a SS ID blog. h o. p er. So they can connect me on Facebook. And I also have an Instagram, Miss Cassidy Eden. So that's my Instagram handle. And I connect with me there's Wales. So yeah, with the questions you have. And if you want to connect me and follow me and bring me you can, so yeah. Unknown Speaker 11:26 Awesome. Well, thank Betsy Furler 11:26 you so much for being on the show. Cassidy Hooper 11:30 You're welcome. And I enjoyed it. Thank you for having me. And audience. Thank Betsy Furler 11:34 you so much for tuning in. Again, please rate, review, subscribe, and all those things with this podcast on whatever podcast platform you're listening to. And if you want to know more about the company that I founded, for all abilities, you can go to my website at for all abilities calm, to find out about how we help businesses, support their customers and their employees with disabilities and also help them reach required mandates from the ADA for federal and corporate contracting. And you can also follow me on LinkedIn at Betsy Furler f er le AR. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks so much for listening to the for all abilities podcast. This is Betsy Furler, your host and I really appreciate your time listening to the podcast. And please subscribe on any podcast app that you're listening to us on. If you'd like to know more about what we do in our software that helps employer support their employees with ADHD dyslexia, learning differences in autism, please go to www dot for all abilities.com You can also follow us on Instagram. And you can follow me on LinkedIn at Betsy Furler. f as in Frank, you are le AR Have a great day and we will see you soon. Transcribed by https://otter.ai

On this episode, we interview David Sharif about working with autism.

Betsy Furler 0:05 Welcome to for all abilities, the podcast. This is your host, Betsy Furler. The aim of this podcast is to highlight the amazing things people with ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences and autism are doing to improve our world. Have a listen to for all abilities, the podcast, and please subscribe on whatever podcast app you're listening to us on. Welcome back to for all abilities, the podcast. This is your host, Betsy Furler. And I'm so excited to be here again today talking to all of you, and another special guest. I'll introduce him in a minute. But I hope you all join us for an interesting conversation on autism, neuro diversity, and why we all need to value the differences of others as well as our own differences. So today, we have David Sheree with us and I probably mispronounced his name, but he's gonna tell us in a minute, he has autism and is a Autism Awareness advocate. And I'm really excited to hear about David's life story, and how autism has affected his life. So welcome, David. David Sharif 1:19 Thank you for having me. Oh, and before anything, you perfectly pronounced my last name, so don't worry. Betsy Furler 1:26 Oh, it's a miracle. Unknown Speaker 1:27 Yeah. Betsy Furler 1:29 So why don't you just introduce yourself to my audience? David Sharif 1:33 Sure. So my name is David Sharif. I am a magnet come loud, a graduate of Pace University with a Bachelor of Arts in political science and Peace and Justice Studies. And I currently live in Ridgewood, New York. Betsy Furler 1:47 Awesome. So usually we start the show by talking a little bit about what you were like as a little boy, and your diagnosis everywhere you remember it? I think I read you were diagnosed as around the age of four. Yeah, so you may or may not remember that. But anyway, tell us tell us your own words to tell us about that. David Sharif 2:07 So yeah, I actually do remember my diagnosis. And I kind of noticed my behavioral challenges during my world travels, because I grew up in a family, where global citizenship and traveling the world is a huge passion. So what happened was my family and I were flying back to the United States from Pakistan, at the airport, and Islam about a security guard wanted to look into my suitcase. And I lashed out when that happened, but then my parents had to help me. And then they were able to tell the security, check the security guards that he that he is different. And then so that situation was handled. And then by the time we got back to Los Angeles, I was taken to the pediatrics to be evaluated. I had my early therapy sessions. And I was also a part of a youth group, where I really, really explored, I'd been where I explored the arts in various ways, before I got enrolled into a school that provides different supports for kids with learning differences from pre preschool, kindergarten to high school. Betsy Furler 3:32 Awesome, and you obviously are a smart person. Because you graduated from college, and with honors and you did it in four years, correct? I did, which is not necessarily like, you know, people don't have to do that. But it is an accomplishment in like now it's definitely an accomplishment. So congratulations on that. David Sharif 3:53 Thank you. Betsy Furler 3:54 So what was what were you? What were your academic? and academics like early on? So like in elementary school? Did you struggle in school? Or did you always do pretty well? David Sharif 4:06 So back in elementary school on the workload wasn't that tedious. Um, so during elementary school, we had something called spelling tests, they were a combination of short words, long words. And the spelling tests didn't matter about the words that we got, right? It's really about learning how we spell them how we learn from mistakes. And, and even before I got into upper elementary school, we had separate reading groups based on the comprehension skills of other students. And then we were reading stories that we were familiar with and were not familiar with. We had to learn how to catch words that specified the main idea of a story. And then moving into around fifth or sixth grade. This was a really, really fun learning style. That I enjoyed very much. And it was visualizing and verbalizing, which is looking at an image using 12 different categories to picture the, what the image is representing. And also, we had to do the same thing with stories that were around four to five sentences. And really, really studying the essence of how you can comprehend a long story when you start to read longer books, and especially stories that are not going to be black and white. But even before fifth and sixth grade, my peers and I were very, very lucky to have had a teacher who really helped us improve our reading skills with analogies, synonyms, opposites. And he was so great because he helped everyone improve their reading skills. And we even learned how to catch verbs, nouns, adjectives, we had to mark do different markings on what we discovered and what we read. And we, and moving into the advancements of technology, we learned how to type properly on the keys with different sources that teach us how to type sentences. And then without looking at big computers, we had alpha smarts that have the keys in the same spot. And that's how we practiced our typing to see if we made errors if we didn't make errors. This is really all about discovering the way we learn how we are different. And sometimes the challenge of it is, there are students who are more advanced than other ones. There are students who have a who are following the criteria greatly. Students who have really, really kept up with the needed criteria to move forward to further education. And sometimes there is a lot of argument between students about that. I had been in that situation before. And and it was certainly not fun at all. Betsy Furler 7:14 I love the visualizing and verbalizing idea. And I'm a speech pathologist by training. I don't know if I told you that earlier. Um, so that is so interesting. I love it when I hear people's stories about great things that happened to them in school. And clearly that made a huge impact on you and probably helped you all the way through college. Oh, yeah. David Sharif 7:37 Well, I actually wanted to bring up to the point was, after elementary school, the administration told me that I would not graduate high school. So then in my first year of middle school, I was not on the deployment track. In the school that I went to, there are three different tracks. The diploma track is the advanced track where your learning styles are right at the expectations and you can go to any college you wish to go do so and then from diploma track, there is the certificate track where you are doing work that is kind of too easy, you're not really challenged the way you expect yourself to be. And depending on how your learning styles go, you can potentially take some college courses and classroom settings at community colleges, but not at universities. And the lowest one of the mall is this other certificate program where you really have not improved your learning styles far enough into the point that, okay, this is not going to go well for you. And then after your high school years are done, you're going to go into some different kind of training program that will prepare you for things that may be easier for you. And how it works is if you are not on the diploma track, like I said earlier, that you are not eligible to apply to colleges. Without a doubt you are not eligible to apply to universities, or even schools that are nationally recognized as the top or best ones. Unknown Speaker 9:16 Wow. So you found this out in middle school? David Sharif 9:18 Yes, I did. So in seventh grade, I really didn't care about not being on the diploma track because I was actually too busy with preparing for my bar mitzvah. But then when my brother went to college in New York City, I got very, very upset about it because I was going to be humble alone and I had nobody to mess around with. So and so in eighth grade. I started in in the certificate track of the middle of eighth grade and so my parents advocated for me to proceed to the diplomat track. So in the middle of eighth grade, I went to the diploma track and I was succeeding very well in it and then when I got it into high school, I was placed in the deployment track what I wanted and expected. But then there were multiple meetings with my parents, the teachers and the principals about my learning progress, how I was doing and the strategies that are going to be needed for me to stay in the program and to pass my classes successfully. And I am very, very proud to say that all throughout high school, I had made the aorta row five times and the A and B are in a row three times. Betsy Furler 10:31 That's amazing. And, you know, what also is amazing is that I'm so thankful you had the parents that you did, who helped you advocate for that. And you think about the kids who have autism, who don't have parents who are able to advocate for them or don't know that they should, and don't person confidence in their children. And you know, what they miss out on and with their education? David Sharif 11:00 Well, I really, really do want to bring something out onto this point that I have been around kids who were who did not respect me or did not like me because of my academic success, and that I was doing better than them. This is not school related. But I was also miss treated for finding a home away from home, which is a summer camp that I went to the Poconos, which I also called my imaginary Where's wizarding school, I am a huge Harry Potter fan. And I have memories of watching Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone every weekend when I was like four or five years old, when my family got the video that but going back into high school, it was very serious because my reading comprehension skills were not that great. But they weren't in English class. But in history class, they were pretty decent because I did enjoy history. And with all the traveling I've done in my years, it was easy to recognize that I was very good with mathematics or and I did decent in science as well. And the other thing that I got mistreated about was the fact that I mentioned I live in a family that loves to travel the world, I have been traveling the world since I was two months old every summer every winter, I was also mistreated. For all the traveling I'd done. This is a very, very huge thing that I will say. I was bullied by a group of twin brothers and some of their supporters. They told me that I should not go to college in New York City, and that it would never amount to anything for me. But what did I do? I took their pessimistic feelings. I used them what they told me and I took my inspirational attachments to become a magnet can lead a graduate of a prestigious university. Betsy Furler 13:06 That's amazing. And I I think that's the best revenge for bullies. Oh, yes, they're doing it's succeeding at the thing that that they're trying to tell you that you can't do. And I do think that bullying often comes out of jealousy. Rather than Unknown Speaker 13:27 Yes, Betsy Furler 13:29 the tribe thinking that someone really is less than them. Usually they think you're more than they are. And that's what they don't like. David Sharif 13:36 Well, yeah, and, and I never and sometimes it's hard to really reveal that and I really tried to be as private as I can. And usually in my locker I have printed pictures of me with my friends from summer camp, and what they have done for me to support me and how they have been a part of my autism journey. And also pick pictures from New York City because New York City is considered to be my dream city. And I fell in love with it when I first went there and when I walked into my grandparents his apartment, just looking at the gorgeous views of the city lights and all the vehicles and I did that every morning while my family was sleeping. And another thing that kind of relates to the bullying was I also got bossed around by another person I'll senior year because this person was going to go to a community college and I did not choose to do that I wanted to blaze a new trail which was to go to a university and I kind of do I kind of meant to be boastful about this but I do want to mention this because it is true. And I do keep it as a fresh memory. I graduated high school as valedictorian and I am the first student from my school. To go to a university in New York City and the other side of the country, and I never noticed that until the end of my journey, and, and despite being told that I was going to be valedictorian. Before my last semester of high school, I had to focus on getting good grades and maintaining them, and even to remain admitted into peace University where I went to and the first school that admitted me, Betsy Furler 15:30 that's amazing. And were you the first person with autism to be valedictorian at your high school? Do you have any idea? David Sharif 15:36 Oh, no, no, no, it's like, more than 80 or 90% of our students are on the autism spectrum and learning differences. And also, like I mentioned before, the school I went to is a multidisciplinary special needs school. So every class or almost every graduating class had a valedictorian on the autism spectrum. So that part does not correlate to anything. Betsy Furler 16:06 So one, one thing about autism that I have noticed since I've started doing this podcast, actually, and because I love people with autism, and how people with autism think I think it is such a gift to our world. And to have people to Brett whose brains work in such a unique, different and interesting way. And what but one thing that I hadn't really realized until I started doing this podcast is when I have guests with autism on my show. I know everyone with autism is different, right? But the one thing that I have found that is very consistent is that guests with autism, make their appointments really fast, keep their appointments, and are always on time for their appointments with me. So I appreciate that so much. And I think that also probably really served you well in school because you did that as well. As soon as we discussed you being on the podcast, you immediately booked. And here we are today. And I think those skills are really great skills academically and possibly in the work world, which we'll get to in a minute. But I love to hear about college, what your college experience was like, and what your social life was like at college, and how you use your unique brain to succeed at college. Sure, David Sharif 17:33 so I went to college at Pace University in New York City on the New York City Campus. During my college career, I received comprehensive support with the Oasis program. The Oasis Program is a program that helps students with learning differences, navigate college life and prepare for the real world of work. I was a part of that program. All my years of college, I had an academic coach that I met with at least once an hour, four times a week, I had extended time on exams, I was not allowed to use notes on the exams, unless if the professor allowed it, which was different. And there were some classes that I had been in with that before. My academic coach would help me prepare for exams, get by presentations ready to make sure that I have that I am ready to present and talk on stage. And also would help me with my draft papers on a Google Drive and to make sure that my citations are accurate because it is without a doubt required on almost every single paper because we're using sources that are not considered to be our own and we have to credit Um, so another thing that I very much liked about my college career was I participated in an employment readiness workshop that is reserved for upper sophomores or seniors in the Oasis program. It could be for juniors and seniors right now I'm not entirely sure about that. In our work readiness program, we are trained by our career slash internship counselor, along with employment skills coordinators from another nonprofit that I actually work for right now. We have 12 weeks of the workshop, where we learn about communication in the workplace, how to behave in the workplace, drafting resumes, writing cover letters, mock interviews, which are considered to be practice interviews that help us prepare for the real one. And also to understand what our goals are and ambitions are when we enter the real world of work. And the goal of that is for every student in the Oasis program to have an internship or to be interning at any company before they graduate college. And I have had the privilege of doing administrative work as an intern for my grandfather's company, partners for progressive Israel. Betsy Furler 20:21 Ah, that's amazing. So, your college sounds like they did an amazing job or preparing you for the workforce. David Sharif 20:28 Yes. And and another thing that I would love to bring out and that I missed most about college was I traveled abroad five times during my college career. So my first adventure was a January term course, that on ecosystems and biodiversity, I studied that at Universidad San Francisco de Quito and Quito, Ecuador. And I went to the Galapagos. And this course was administered by a by an instructor with scuba diving experience and also trained with biology from the United Kingdom. And the study abroad program was administered by the American Institute for Foreign Studies, which is a study abroad organization that provides day trips, excursions and cultural activities, I support the organization 100%. So then, after my January term abroad in Ecuador, I went abroad with the same organization to Barcelona, Spain, in the fall semester of my junior year, where I studied global politics, and euro Mediterranean Relations at a large public university in Barcelona. And then I did the same thing in my senior year of college, the January term in Berlin, Germany, studying the rise and fall of Nazi Germany and anti semitism, which was a pretty emotional one. Because knowing that Judaism is my religion, it's very hard for me to control my emotions at these places, sometimes one of my favorite colleges, and one of my favorite college courses, in being a political science major was Model United Nations Model United Nations takes you beyond the classroom. It's like you write a position paper, that is very short, you are given a country that you have to represent like every institution has on but you can choose the UN committee that you think you can work your best in. And that is how it usually happens. Sometimes we get our top choices, sometimes we get our second choices. And we attend the national Model United Nations Conference in New York City during the spring semester. That is considered to be the pinnacle Model United Nations Conference in America because it is the biggest one out of the mall with more than 4000 delegates from all over the world. And there are two separate conferences. Every fall semester, our Model UN team travels to Washington DC, which I never took in the fall semester. So I got to take Model UN three times, I did two conferences in New York City. I applied and was accepted to attend an international one. So when I took Model UN for my last and third time, I attended a conference in Rome, Italy, where I represented the People's Republic of China in the Economic and Social Council, but even expanding the studies of the United Nations. Right before my senior year began, I participated in a United Nations program in Geneva, Switzerland, where I got to go to the UN headquarters in Geneva, visit other UN agencies, the Red Cross Museum, how the United Nations was established after World War Two, and what and how it has really enhanced global communication. And what's so great about bottle United Nations, my top three favorite things are traveling the world, building friendships, and studying how political and global organizations practice their negotiation. We've learned to draft working papers that are written in un language and it's much different than just writing a regular English paper. And with the people that come from all over the world, it's a chance to build friendships and to have some time with the people you're going to see not knowing when you may even see them again, and with the traveling that you are doing, which could be budgeted by your school, it's a great opportunity because you have a bit of time to, you know, go sightseeing or attend in evening activity and you are just accommodated so well. And then there's a bit of a celebration that happens. And you are recognized for all the accomplishments that you do in Model UN awards are given now, but when I think about Model UN awards is not really on my mind, because I like to focus on the general aspect of it, that just makes it so fun. Because putting your mind on awards just really doesn't help you control yourself when you want to have a good con, a good experience at the conference. So what I really, really miss the most about Model UN is the traveling, the studies of global communication, and the friendships you make, it's just a phenomenal thing that can happen. And I just really am grateful for participating in it. And I was advised from some of my peers to take it. And it was so much fun in so many ways. And that is always going to be something I miss, I'd miss all of the traveling that I did during my college life. That was like the biggest accomplishment that I would never forget. And I am so grateful. For even the friends I have made a different institutions around the United States and feeling impacted by my social economic background and my religious background, I have very much learned how to be mindful about other perspectives and to understand that one perspective is never wrong, and how to be open to it, and how to really control your emotions, and discipline your mind when you are surrounded by things that can affect the way you think and the way you feel when you see those things. Betsy Furler 27:10 That's incredible. My one regret from college is not going not traveling abroad at all. And I also went to a college that had a jam term program. So for our listeners who don't know what we're talking about these schools have you take one class or go on a trip, you know, educational travel, and event in the month of January, and then the spring semester starts in February. And it's such a great opportunity to travel. And I did not take that in college and I regret it if your experiences sound amazing. So why don't you tell us a little bit about what you're doing for work these days. And and then you know, let us say, let us know anything else. And then we'll wrap up with some contact information for you. David Sharif 28:00 Sure. So at the moment, I am working for the employment and business services department of a large nonprofit called HRC. I coached neurodiverse adults in building and fulfilling lives. I have been working for that company since February. At the moment we are working virtually. But we are doing an action plan to getting back to community based stuff. But that's going to be done very slowly. Throughout my six or seven months with the job, kind of excluding the furlough that I had, when COVID stroke. I had been shadowing my colleagues, I had been using that time to learn about the people I am supporting, observing how I'm getting along with them. There's some I work well with there are some that I struggled to work well with. And moving on to the job right now I'm going to be starting to learn how to lead activities, and how that can be done. Now that I have felt more comfortable with the work and how it is usually done. But before COVID head, we go out in the community, and do community based organizations where we help elders receive good meals. I can observe the talents of the people I am supporting the goals they want to accomplish before they get out in the real world. And what is really fun about this job is you're not just sitting in an office recording numbers or data on a computer, you're going out of the building, to not just explore the city, but to learn about the people you're supporting and seeing what skills they can bring out there. But we're not really doing that right now. So we are like trying to get in contact with some organizations that We have done community based stuff with. And we are virtually doing some home workouts, fitness stuff. And usually by ourselves, we'd like to lead entertaining games like Jeopardy Family Feud Wheel of Fortune, or even create little word games, like I'm potentially thinking about leading Mad Libs, which is a really hysterical game that I enjoyed back very far when I started learning that I was about nine or 10 years old. So that so that's kind of what I am doing right now. And even before COVID hit, I have taken a date, like little day trips to disability rights conferences in the state of New York. So one day, in the end of February, I took a day trip to all buddy with some of the people I support and colleagues, we went to a disability rights conference in the main conference room up in Albany, and like the main office locations, where I kind of introduced myself listen to my adults, and understand the struggles that they have faced and the changes that want to happen. I did something similar to that at another event down in Coney Island. And it was very, very fun, because we got to listen to other organizations that have similar targets to us. And even to other family members who have children who are on the spectrum and are clarifying how they are gifted to be out there in the real world, what they can offer and how their memory banks really play a huge role and how they can be different and how they can recall anything with all the details that some people may often forget. And, you know, that is part of what we do. And that's our job. It's not an easy job. But I enjoyed because I have fun with it. This is a great organization that I work for. And I have been connected with this company, a apparently during my college career, and this company has a similar relationship to Pace University, the school that I went to, and the office that I work for right now has done community based stuff with Pace University. So that's kind of what led me to apply to this job. And, you know, kind of seeing if I was a good fit, I had to go through two interviews, which was meeting with my current supervisor discussing the day to day responsibilities, knowing what I would have to do on doing a regular interview. And then the second interview round was meeting my colleagues and then listening to the experiences of the people that I will be supporting and getting an idea of who they are as well. And it's been a really, really fun job. And I am enjoying just every moment of it. And now I'm kind of going on to a new phase where I'm going to be leading start leading activities after shadowing colleagues and seeing how they lead groups for like, five to six months now. Betsy Furler 33:16 That sounds incredible. It sounds like a great fit for you, someplace where you can really give back, but also earn a living, which is always which is always needed. Right? David Sharif 33:28 Mm hmm. Betsy Furler 33:29 Well, David, is there anybody in particular that has inspired you or kind of is your personal hero that you want to tell us about?

On this episode, we hear from Jeff Synder. Jeff was diagnosed with autism as a child. He was nonverbal and talks about learning to talk. He walks us through his journey to becoming a public speaker and advocate.

Betsy Furler 0:05 Welcome to for all abilities, the podcast. This is your host, Betsy Furler. The aim of this podcast is to highlight the amazing things people with ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences and autism are doing to improve our world. Have a listen to for all abilities, the podcast, and please subscribe on whatever podcast app you're listening to us on. Welcome back to for all abilities, the podcast. This is Betsy Furler, your host and I'm excited to be here to introduce you to another special guest. And this podcast is all about talking to people who are living successfully with neuro diversity, like autism, ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences, as well as other disabilities, because I am so passionate about all of us embracing our differences and the differences of others, because I think our different brains are what really makes our world an interesting, productive and efficient place. So today, our special guest is Jeff Snyder. Welcome to the podcast. Jeff. Jeff Snyder 1:16 Thank you for inviting me, Betsy. Yes. Why don't you introduce yourself a little bit to our audience. Okay, well, my name is Jeff Snyder. I am 31 years old from seekonk, Massachusetts, here in Providence, Rhode Island. And I have been I was first diagnosed with autism at 21 months old. I've I am a 2007, graduate of seekonk High School. And upon my graduation, I was the first student with autism to have completed pre K through grade 12 in the seekonk public school system. Um, my day job is I work as a janitor, janitorial specialists for a major supermarket company up here. And I and since 2015, I have been living in my own apartment, and I am also a home. I'm also a panelist on the show on the weekly video series, Ask an Autistic every Tuesday, which is on every Tuesday night at eight o'clock on YouTube. And I am also a avid world traveler and I am also a fan fiction writer. Betsy Furler 2:28 Awesome. Well, I'm so excited that you're here. And as we talked earlier, you probably don't remember your diagnosis at 21 months. And but what do you know about your early childhood? What were you I like when you were a really young child? Jeff Snyder 2:46 Well, when I was really young I I didn't, I was very much nonverbal. And when I was first diagnosed with autism, I, I remember I couldn't talk I would sometimes resort to hitting things and throwing things just to communicate. And it wasn't. And it wasn't until about 1998 when the serious news came to my house to interview me for a special that they were doing on a thing called autism. And until that moment, I didn't know I was on the autism spectrum. And it was not until they came to my house, they that I found out about my diagnosis. So you might say it, it took about I didn't know till I was about nine years old that I was on spectrum. Betsy Furler 3:45 Wow. When did you and when did you start talking? Do you know? Jeff Snyder 3:50 I remember I think I was nonverbal. I think I was about four years old. Betsy Furler 3:56 That's amazing. I'm a speech pathologist by training. So I'm always very interested in hearing stories of people who were late talkers, who were now who are now communicating well, so that's amazing. So what was it like when you went off to school when you went to kindergarten and then to elementary school? Jeff Snyder 4:18 Well, I began my education. In 1992. When I was three years old, I was enrolled. I was enrolled in like a special special school special preschool and then that was an odd northborough. I was at a I was at St. Lawrence school in North Providence, which was where I began my educational journey and then and then I began my my my proper preschool training in 1993 at teddy bear preschool here in seekonk. And then I first enrolled in the I first went into the seekonk public school system in 1994. And when I went In when I was in kindergarten, I met a really, really nice um, I had a really nice teacher and, and the funny story is that when I graduated from priests from from preschool, teddy bear preschool, I had met my kindergarten teacher and and for some reason I, I somehow don't remember saying this but from what I heard was my kindergarten said, Geoffrey Snyder, are you looking forward to going into Miss coils, kindergarten Catholic kindergarten class, and I said, Geoffrey Paul Snyder is and going into Miss coils kindergarten class, and, and for some reason I I don't, I mean, I don't remember saying that. But, but I guess that's what the story is. And then when I was throughout elementary school, I had been, um, during the summers, I would get, like, assisted tutoring from my kindergarten teacher, I remember throughout my entire elementary school career during the summer, I would, I would go undergo special tutoring with her, we would, you know, get out into the community and do things and we also do summer, the equivalent of summer readings. So, so I mean, I, I did have some, it was all included in my individual education wise plan or IEP. So, you might say that, um, I did have some kind of assistant training during my, during the first half of my school career ran through till I went into middle school. Betsy Furler 6:37 Were you in general ed classes or in special ed classes in elementary school? Jeff Snyder 6:42 I was in general ed classes, but I was again on the IEP and I would um, for like, a few times a few times a day, I would do speech, I would do occupational therapy. I would do like, learning sent home or club I mean, because I'm a lot of us don't like to do homework at home, we would rather do it at school. So I I have that luxury of doing that. So, um, but I'm but for the most part, I was in general, I was in regular sized classes in elementary school. Betsy Furler 7:18 What about middle school? So most kids in middle school start doing you know, more extracurricular activities, sports, choir band, things like that? And what was middle school like for you? And did you do any of those extracurricular type activities. Jeff Snyder 7:34 When I was in middle school, I was actually put into special i was i was put into special education classes. And as a matter of fact, some of the pilot programs that were created around me are actually still in existence to this very day, believe it or not, um, and, I mean, I attended all I attended all regular classes, but but one thing I will, I will say is the one special class I was special, a class I was a part of was special in math. And for the first two years, sixth and seventh grade, I was in special ed English. And when I, when I went into eighth grade, I was put in a regular English class, because our reason was that because the teacher, my English teacher, they had an eighth grade, also taught my sister and she had become, she had become very enamored of me through my sister. So that was how I started to kind of branch out of doings regular English classes, but I still did on special ed, math classes in sixth and seventh grade. And then, for the first semester of my eighth grade year, I was in a regular math class when that didn't work out. I went back into a special ed, math class. Betsy Furler 8:57 And then you went on to high school and you went through the same feeder pattern, right. So you were kind of with the same kids from elementary, middle and high school. Jeff Snyder 9:08 Well, I mean, for the most part, yes. No, I mean, like, um, like when I got to middle school, things kind of changed. I, in terms of students, I did have some are regular. I did have some classmates that follow me to the high school program, but then I went, but I did, but I did stay in. I did stay in a specialized math class from ninth grade, and 10th grade and, and all the other classes amazingly were. Were all regular sized classes, and the only class I didn't take in high school was foreign language. Because because they offered Spanish, French Portuguese And I couldn't do all those things. So that was it that was in my IP. That was including my IP that I would not take a foreign language class. And I actually didn't take gym class my freshman year, but in sophomore and my senior year, I did take some classes. So Betsy Furler 10:22 that's interesting about the foreign language I was I was actually just thinking about that today about a child that I know who's he's six, he's in first grade. And he's in a school, a private school that he has to take two different foreign languages. And I was thinking today about oh, my goodness, that's, I think this is so confusing for him. So I'm glad you had a different experience and didn't have to, didn't have to do that. Um, did you like being in general ed class classes or in special ed classroom classes more? Jeff Snyder 10:56 Well, I mean, there were some generalized classes that had about 30 people. So I will say from firsthand experience, that it can be overstimulating to be in a class of 30 people, but when I was when I was younger, I would always mask my emotions. So that I could try to fit in and, and looking back now. I mean, I, part of me wishing asked importantly, wished I didn't ask but, but for the most part, I mean, if I wasn't in, if I wasn't in regular classes in high school, then things would be a lot different right now, because I had a friend that I gotten to know, a lot of my gen ed teachers on a personal level. And if, if I wasn't in general, if I wasn't in those general classes, then things would be a lot different. So it was more about the personal relationships, that was more than the actual class size. Betsy Furler 12:01 Okay. That's interesting. So when you said when you were really little, you would throw things and kind of have temper tantrums around communication? And what was your quote unquote, behavior? Like, in middle and high school? Were you one of those, it sounds like you might have been one of those people that just kind of shut down, shut out. What's going on around you, rather than acting out? Jeff Snyder 12:27 Well, when I was, um, when I was in Milan, high school, I mean, I will say that my, I would always show two faces, the face I would show in school was very different from the face I would show at home. When I wasn't when I was in school, I tried to be, I would try to bring a sense of professional professionalism into, into my, into my education. Because, you know, school, I think a lot of people don't realize this is that school is sort of a professional environment. I mean, you're around teachers that have to be professional in their appearance. And, and, and believe it or not, my dad for 35 years was a vice president for a major company up here in New England. And so I adopted that business style that he had, and took it into my public schooling. I mean, sure, you know, there's a lot of kids that sure a lot of my fellow classmates weren't on the same page as me. Of course, nobody is. But that was, that was my mindset going into going into the educational aspect, it was just to maintain a level of professionalism. But at home, but at home, things were obviously different. And I don't want to go into too much of that, but but, you know, school was the professional side and home life was the personal side. For me. Yeah. Betsy Furler 13:57 That also that probably really helped you when you got out of school, that you had all those kind of years of practice of, of acting professional and probably more grown up actually, then a lot of kids act. Jeff Snyder 14:13 That is true. Yes. I, um, it did help me in a sense. I mean, um, and the funny thing is, when I got into after I graduated high school, I didn't go into college, I only took a few classes at a community college up here and in Massachusetts, and, and I gotta tell you, college is very different from public school life. I mean, the thing with with some colleges is that they don't accept you, when you're on it and stuff me I didn't get accepted into Johnson and Wales for their own tourism and hospitality services. And then I was also accepted into Bristol Community College, which is the aforementioned community college that I took a few classes. At. And then for for a couple years from I think 2008 till 2013. I did take a few college classes, I took one math classes, a reading class, actually two reading classes and two writing classes. And then I came to the conclusion that, you know, college isn't for everybody, and you don't have you don't need a college degree to go anywhere in life. So when i. So, in 2013, I took the arm, like a heavy level, advanced writing class, and I had to, I said, You know what, I can't do it. I mean, I'm done. And so, for me, it was more about and there's a time to walk away. I mean, you know, I said to myself, you know, I did my job, in school in public school. College is a whole different animal. And, you know, I was, I was happy. I mean, you know, I've been, I've, it's seven years later, and I, I have no regrets for, for stopping my college education. Betsy Furler 16:06 That's great. And, you know, the good thing about that, too, is if you ever decide you do want to do that, to get good want to go back to college, you always can, right, there's not like you've, you know, never shut the door completely on it. But I think that is, I think that's a really good point that college isn't for everybody. And that's okay. Because there's so many things, so many skills our world needs that you don't even learn in college. So it's and sometimes it's it this, the stress of it is, is so detrimental to people that they they go just because they think they have to or they think that's what society is expecting of them. So tell me about well, I want to I want to hear about your fan fiction writing and about your job and about the advocacy that you do. So I guess that you know in whatever order you feel comfortable with. Tell us about that. Jeff Snyder 17:07 Well, while the first in regards to my fanfiction I am well first off, I am also a member of the Disney and Brony phantoms. And for those of you listening who don't know what a brony is, they are fans of the show My Little Pony Friendship is Magic that actually ended on almost a year ago. Last October and for the past seven years I've been writing seven or eight years I've been writing fanfiction not not just of story space from My Little Pony but also of Disney have and a few other things. And for those of you who aren't familiar with the term fanfiction, a fanfiction is a story based around a movie, a TV series on a book on you know all those things and you take the characters from that story and you put them and you put your own little spin on it. And I've been doing that for I remember I did write my first fanfiction, to be honest in 2004 but it wasn't until about 2012 that I really started taking off with my fan fiction writing and and then so but with and right now I'm currently working for the past year I've been working on a continuation of My Little Pony Friendship is Magic on I've ran a season 10 I have ran a season 11 and i have i've actually literally just start work on season 12 the season 12 premiere was published last week, so Betsy Furler 18:46 that's amazing. So where do you Where do people read your fanfiction? Jeff Snyder 18:52 Right now my two main profiles are on www dot FanFiction. Net my username is Twilight Sparkle 3562 or one all one saying have spaces in I am also on www dot fanfiction dotnet with the same pen name, Twilight Sparkle 3562 and then I am also on DeviantArt also Twilight Sparkle 3562. So those are really the three main writing platforms that I use for my fanfictions Betsy Furler 19:28 That's amazing. I didn't know anything about fanfiction until a couple of years ago when the movie A Star Is Born came out the Lady Gaga Bradley Cooper version. And I was obsessed with the movie. And anyway, there's a lot of fan fiction around that movie. And so that's that's when I discovered this phenomenon and I think it's amazing that i mean it's it's so fun that you know now we have the internet that can bring us together on on niche interests like that and all of that. Other people's visions and ideas about things. But I also think it's amazing that you had you know, you you are able you, it sounds like in in high school you struggled a bit in the general ed English class and now you're writing, you know, a lot of information and I'm enjoying it sounds like you enjoy it too. Jeff Snyder 20:25 Yes. And actually, during my, in my eighth during my eighth grade year of middle school all the way through English in high school was where I really started to kind of hone my craft. And if I wasn't in if I never took generalized English, General English classes to begin with, I wouldn't be able to, you know, do my fanfiction writing. So, I do get, I got to give myself a lot of credit for you know, being in regular English classes from grade eight through grade 12. Betsy Furler 21:00 Yes, that's incredible. Um, tell us a little bit about what you do during the day, your day job. Jeff Snyder 21:08 Oh, my day job is um, for the past. Um, well, my first real day job was ran after I got out of high school I was at borders bookstores in North Attleboro, Massachusetts I was at I was a bookseller at their store from 2007 to 2010, I started working in inventory, and then I worked my way up to customer service. And then from December 2010, till today, I have been working for a major supermarket chain called stop and shop. I started out as a bagger. And I am currently a janitorial specialist for the, for them. And, and I mean, I, you know, at first I kind of like my job, but right now, but it's not good. But the thing with jobs is that they don't last forever, you can't be in the same job forever. And I mean, they're, you know, be closing the chapter, at my time with unstoppered chop, they're a great company, but I mean, it's, you know, things, things change. And, and, you know, you know, and I have, you know, I've got really good talent, and I mean, I have very good computer skills. And I mean, you know, I will say this, that we all have skills that we sometimes have to, that we wish to harness, but we don't know how. But when that time comes, you got to take it, you got to take it. Because if you if you don't take those chances, then you're not going to get that second chance. Again. Betsy Furler 22:54 That's so true. And I also believe that, you know, you kind of have a job that you enjoy for a while, but then you know, when it's time to be involved, so glad you glad glad you realized that and, you know, can go on and, and keep working and you know, doing other things, and hopefully we'll get it get to work to your strengths. Because my hunch is that the janitorial work is probably not working to your strengths. You can do it, but it's probably not what's what what your strengths really are. Jeff Snyder 23:25 Sure, well, you might say that yes. Betsy Furler 23:29 What about your advocacy work? Jeff Snyder 23:33 Well, for my advocacy work on fit, I've run a run a group page and a railer page on Facebook. If anyone's interested on my Facebook group, my facebook group is called Jeff Snyder, disability self advocacy. It started off as Jeff Snyder autism self advocacy, but and then the summer of this past August, I had changed it to Jeff Snyder, disability self advocacy, and we have an right now I have close to 500 group, almost 500 people that are of this group and also pay all this advocate, which is also originally called Jeff Snyder, autism self advocate and change. I changed the name of that of my page along with my group also in August. And then I recently actually I became a moderator for the global hawks subprojects Facebook group autism knows no borders. Betsy Furler 24:40 Awesome. I think it's so important that people advocate for themselves and help other people learn how to be a self advocate. My My son has a neuro immune disorder, an autoimmune disorder that affects his neurological system. So he's been really sick throughout his life, he's 22 now. And when he was a baby, I started teaching him to advocate for himself. And I was so glad that I had that knowledge that that was so important, because I think it is really helped him live the best life that he can, because he can advocate for himself. And I think I think that's so important. Now, when did you move away from home and into your own apartment? How old were you when you did that? Jeff Snyder 25:29 It was actually I actually lived at home full time until I was about 26. I moved into my own, actually 25. So I moved into my own apartment in January of 2015. And I've been here ever since. And, and I'm actually one of the very few in terms of very few exceptions in terms of people with disability disabilities, like autism live on their own. I mean, there are some parents that have those with a disability who will never let their kids move out of the house, either because they are they lack the skills or because because they're very protective. But, you know, at first, you know, in terms of my folks, they were very, they were actually very nervous about me moving out, but my psychologist was telling me, you know, Jeff, you know, I think you're ready to move out. And, and I, and I finally came to that conclusion, in January of 2015. I said, you know, now is the time to do it. So, after Christmas, I, I got into my own place. I mean, I've been here since 20. Since then, and I've, I've enjoyed it, I mean, it gives me a sense of independence, it gives me a sense of, you know, privacy and, and in addition to that, I also do a lot of I also do a lot of traveling, I traveled to I mean, at first I I attended Brony conventions, which are fan conventions, again, based off of the My Little Pony show, but recently, I've started to transition to autism conferences and training since one of my passions is public speaking. And recently, and actually, last fall, I was on a, I was on a panel in San Diego for the autism tree project Foundation's neuroscience conference. So that's where I kind of want to get involved with is to travel to conferences and trainings across the country. And, and kind of share my story and, and just just tell people, you know, when I my story, what I've been through, and just be a mentor to parents and teachers and anyone who connected with autism or any other disabilities, so, because if they hear people, if they hear stories like mine, then they can be inspired from them. Betsy Furler 28:05 Absolutely, I think it's so important for people who work with kids and, and adults with autism for that matter, and parents to hear from somebody like you who can give, tell your experience so well, that it gives, it really helps teachers and parents understand that kids with autism in particular, can grow up and do great things and live on their own and all of that. And even though even though parents, as parents were scared, you know, to let our kids go and be independent. What was the hardest thing about moving into your own apartment? Jeff Snyder 28:46 I mean, well, the one thing, the one big thing that was really tough for me was transportation, because I don't have a car and I don't drive, which is probably a good thing, but it's not really very much of it's not really much of independence, in terms of terms of independence, but I will say if anyone with a disability like mine who's trying to move into the wrong place and doesn't drive, what I typically use is I use a buzzer, I use a disability bus service, which, unfortunately I have not used since March due to the pandemic, but I use a bus service called Yatra. And they take me to they take me to my job they take me to do some of my writing at the store. I have a Starbucks, it's right down the street from from my apartment. So I usually sometimes go there and I haven't been able to also because of the pandemic. But I mean, you know, you know, disability bus services, um, Uber Lyft. I mostly use Lyft because as I get delta skymiles with Delta Airlines when I Take a left. So I will say that is probably the biggest that was the biggest challenge for me was was was transportation. Betsy Furler 30:12 That I'm glad you figured it out that we we have in here in Houston, Texas, we have a similar bus service for people with disabilities. Um, but yeah, I don't know what's going on with it now because of the pandemic. But hopefully, hopefully we'll be past this at some point. Right. And we'll be able to really live our lives again. Jeff Snyder 30:36 Yeah, I mean, well, I mean, they always say, you know, it's, you know, a vaccine is coming. And, you know, I keep telling people that this isn't good, this pandemics not gonna last forever. So, Betsy Furler 30:47 right, right, this feels like it at points, but eventually we'll move on, right? Well, this has been such a wonderful interview. And, Jeff, I think this is going to really help a lot of people and think about what they can do, as self advocates, and parents and teachers what they can do, and understand what their what the kids they're working with, or their own children can do. So if people want to continue and want to follow you or get in touch with you, what is the best way to do that? Jeff Snyder 31:20 Ah, well, I am on one. First off, I am on Facebook, you could follow me, you can join my group, Jeff Snyder, disability self advocacy. Or you can follow my page, just search for disabilities self advocate, I also have a Patreon. I also have a personal page on Facebook. And then I also have an I also have a an account on LinkedIn, you can follow me on LinkedIn or connect with me on LinkedIn. And if you also want to reach me, um, I am also my email is Twilight Sparkle. 356 [email protected]. Betsy Furler 32:00 Awesome. I, I'm sure there gonna be people who want to reach out and I will put all of that information in the show notes, so they'll be able to find it there. And audience thank you so much for tuning in today. For the for all abilities, the podcast, and my interview with Jeff Snyder, this was so valuable and so helpful. And and please like review Rate, Subscribe, all of those things, my podcasts on whatever podcast, app or platform you're listening on, and I will talk to you all soon. Thanks so much for listening to the for all abilities podcast. This is Betsy Furler, your host and I really appreciate your time listening to the podcast. And please subscribe on any podcast app that you're listening to us on. If you'd like to know more about what we do in our software that helps employers support their employees with ADHD dyslexia, learning differences in autism, please go to www dot for all abilities calm. You can also follow us on Instagram. And you can follow me on LinkedIn at Betsy Furler. f as in Frank, you are le AR Have a great day and we will see you soon Transcribed by https://otter.ai

For All Abilities – The Podcast Liz De La Torre - A Successful Nursing Career with ADHD

For this episode of For All Abilities: The Podcast, I spoke with Liz De La Torre - one of my son's nurses. She talks about her nursing career and ADHD.

To connect with Henry, please email her at [email protected].

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Please follow me on Instagram @forallabilities, LinkedIn (Betsy Furler) and on Facebook (For All Abilities). Go to our website www.forallabilities.com for information on our software that enables employers to support their employees with ADHD, Dyslexia, Learning Differences and Autism.

Thanks for listening!

Betsy

Thanks for listening to For All Abilities today!

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Transcription by Otter.ai

Betsy Furler 0:05

Welcome to for all abilities, the podcast. This is your host, Betsy Furler. The aim of this podcast is to highlight the amazing things people with ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences and autism are doing to improve our world. Have a listen to for all abilities, the podcast and please subscribe on whatever podcast app you're listening to us on. Hi, everybody. This is Betsy, your host for all abilities. Thank you so much for joining me today on my podcast. This podcast is meant to inspire everyone to use all of their differences as their strengths. And we frequently talk about neuro diversity and how it's so important to have different brains in this world. Today I have a special guest, Liz della toray hopefully I said that correctly, Liz, please introduce yourself to my audience.

Liz de la Torre 1:05

Hi, I'm Liz de la Torre. And I am 60 years old. I've been a nurse for 37 years. And I have been ADHD actually since I was 21 years old. So 49 years 39 long time.

Betsy Furler 1:24

Awesome. And we met, um, because you have been my son, Henry's nurse, several multiple times. And we got started talking and I was so glad that you agreed to be on the podcast. And so I guess I gave people a little bit of a teaser that you're a nurse professionally, but we'll get to that in a minute. And so tell us what were you like when you were a little girl?

Liz de la Torre 1:48

So when I was little, I went to Catholic schools and it was just strict girls school nuns only, and I never could sit still back then there wasn't a day diagnosis of and so I was always getting spanked, pinched ears cold, you got ants in your pants, that kind of situation. And I would try, you know, super hard to just sit down and pay attention but I couldn't because I was my mind was going elsewhere and I needed to get up. So it was that kind of thing. I'm home. It was pretty. I had an older brother. He was nine years older than me and it was kind of like, he was also in a private school. But he would poke at me, I think, I guess he knew, you know that something. I couldn't sit sit still or whatever it was that he would always poke at me and get me in trouble with my parents. Especially. Yeah,

Betsy Furler 2:52

you spent a lot of time in trouble. It sounds like

Liz de la Torre 2:55

I did. I did and it was like, as hard as I would try. Boom, you get it.

Betsy Furler 3:02

Right, you just couldn't make your body do fit into the box of what they wanted you to how they wanted you to behave. Correct. So what about when you got on to middle school in high school?

Liz de la Torre 3:16

Okay, so middle school and high school the same kind of situations with the nuns. And, you know, once you're in middle school, there was it wasn't like we have normal schools now I kind of just float into the next one and then it flowed into high school. But it was pretty much the same thing. grades, I could make super good grades without even studying. But if I didn't care to do it, I would just kind of you know breeze through it because like I said, My mind was going 50,000 miles a minute, and I didn't understand what was the deal. Why didn't everybody else think in speed version like I did.

Betsy Furler 3:57

Did you go to the same school for 12 years or were you did you move at each different level?

Liz de la Torre 4:04

So much amount Sacred Heart, which was the elementary school and I went there through sixth grade. And then seventh grade at Incarnate Word. This was in San Antonio Incarnate Word open their seventh and eighth grade. So that's where I went seventh through 12th grade.

Betsy Furler 4:23

Okay. Okay, so it's kind of same feeder pattern, so to speak, but different schools. So, what did you think? Well, let me ask you about homework, first of all, because I, as I've interviewed so many people, homework seems to have been a big issue for people, lots of people with ADHD. How did you do with homework?

Liz de la Torre 4:44

No, my homework I had was impeccable. I would, I would do it all the time. And I wanted my homework to be perfect. It had to be. I actually we were laughing the other day at work. Because, um, my grandmother taught me how to write and she would take erasers off the big pencils. Well, my brother came home one day and he was bothering me. I was writing my ABCs and he said, What are you doing? Then I kept saying, I'm writing, I'm writing and he pushed my arm so my pencil went across the paper. Ultimately, I was ruining my paper. The man died with the red mark in his in his eye.

Unknown Speaker 5:26

Literally.

Betsy Furler 5:27

Hey, I think a lot of us have scars still from pencils been poked out. Yeah, he definitely deserved that. And well, that's interesting about the homework. So why do you think the homework was easier for you to concentrate on than the schoolwork?

Liz de la Torre 5:45

I don't know. Maybe it was maybe it was because I was in my own environment. Maybe it was because somebody wasn't telling me constantly your back your or pinching at me or poking at me or doing something to me. Maybe that's what it was. I really don't know.

Betsy Furler 6:03

Did you do homework in silence? Or did you have like background noise and things like that?

Liz de la Torre 6:09

No, I always had to have and looking back on it now. I've always had to have some kind of noise. Music mainly going on background.

Betsy Furler 6:20

I went homework versus in the school setting.

Unknown Speaker 6:25

I never thought about it.

Betsy Furler 6:29

That's interesting. So after high school, what did you do?

Liz de la Torre 6:32

So I went to college, um, high school was a blow off. It was a party time for me. And so when my parents were moving from San Antonio, they both retired when I graduated. And oddly enough, they were moving from San Antonio to Houston to retire. Um, so I wanted to stay in San Antonio because I had just gotten a new little boyfriend and all that good stuff. So my main focus, my main thing is I told my dad, I want to go to college. And he looked at me like, it was extremely demeaning. And he said to me, You need to marry one of our rich friend sons. Why would you go to school, college after high school? And I was like, because, you know, high school to me, a C and A d when I got in high school, that was great. I was passing

Unknown Speaker 7:21

too bad. Right? Right. So

Liz de la Torre 7:23

he looked at me and he said, Okay, I'm gonna let you stay. one semester. What do you want to be? A nurse just popped into my head, and I said, and he said, a nurse, you want to be a nurse? I said, Yeah, I want to be a nurse. So he said, Okay, one semester, we're gonna see how it goes. So he got we got an apartment. I had a car, paid for my school. Dean's list for five semesters.

Betsy Furler 7:55

Wow. Where did you go to nursing school.

Liz de la Torre 7:58

I went to see Antonio College for the first two semesters because I think he wanted to see if his money was gonna be spent or not. And then I went to UTSA. And so, at the end of that, it was time it was gonna be time to go into nursing school because I'd gotten all my, you know, I gotten all my academics and stuff down. And so he and my mother came down. And this is a this is about when I went to and I got diagnosed. And they asked me, my dad asked me, so do you like your apartment? And I was like, Yes. Do you like your car? Well, yes. And finally, he looked at me like I was some kind of dumbbell. And he said, Do you like to eat? I said, Well, yeah, of course I do. And he said, then you're gonna have to get a job. Like, get a job for why he said, Well, if you want to stay in Houston, San Antonio, you're gonna have to pay for all your stuff. Or you can come to Houston. And I was like, Are you serious? He said I am. So I had to pack up and I came to Houston and during a physical for enlisted in a during a physical for nursing school. That's when it came up about because I started noticing in math and statistics I could memorize, like series of numbers and keep it. Uh huh. And it was like, What do you call it when you can? Like photographic memory, I can do it. My son can do it, oddly enough, too. But it was eat. That's what a nursing school was extremely easy because I could read the testing material the night before, go to sleep. Wake up and I could see the page. So it was like, great. There it is. But they did diagnose me at the time. It was something before Adderall that they gave me. I forgot what it was. But it started making me calm down. But what it really did is it made me be able to put things like in sequences so I could understand stuff.

Betsy Furler 10:12

I went through I said, I said before you were kind of you had a great memory so you're able to just regurgitate that material. Correct? Excuse me, but not necessarily and comprehend and, and synthesize everything together.

Liz de la Torre 10:28

I think I could I Well, I'm sure I could comprehend because of my grades and everything. But what I started to do is I think it was things that really interested me that I can stop for a minute and pay attention. And there you go, there it is.

Betsy Furler 10:50

Yes, and I think nursing is such a great career for people with ADHD because it's so it's fast paced, and then it's always something different. You know, Like you have all these different patients with all these different conditions, having, you know, in your current job setting different, you know, different treatments being done. So, it's got to be more exciting than some other, you know, a desk job or whatever. Right. So after you were diagnosed, what kind? what difference did that make for you?

Liz de la Torre 11:23

It's almost as Um,

Unknown Speaker 11:27

so

Liz de la Torre 11:29

I could concentrate more. I could effectively do things like so. When I would stay when I go to start cleaning a house, I'd be in the kitchen. Then I would go to Oh, I remember there's there's a glass in the bathroom. Let me go get it did not start cleaning the bathroom, you know, and it was like, and then the

Unknown Speaker 11:51

planes

Liz de la Torre 11:51

cracked in the bathroom, you know, it just wasn't completed. So once I started getting medicine, it was like, I could Concentrate and know I can't go there. I need to stay here and complete this task. Uh huh. Was it? You know, Betsy, when I'm thinking about it with work, I could complete stuff. And I don't know. I don't know. Maybe like I said, maybe it was just because there was a big interest there. Right.

Betsy Furler 12:21

Right. warehouse workers say is boring anyway. It's

Liz de la Torre 12:25

not a big interest. Right? Yeah.

Betsy Furler 12:30

So how did it help your self esteem to be diagnosed? Or or did it did it help?

Liz de la Torre 12:37

I think as far as my self esteem, I don't. I don't think it helped that. I think it helped me understand that. When I was a little kid, I really wasn't a bad kid. I just really couldn't sit still. There's just too many things going on and I was just wired different.

Betsy Furler 13:00

It kind of explained it. You were able to understand yourself better. Probably correct. Yeah. So then after you got out of out of nursing school, where did you What do you didn't end up doing?

Liz de la Torre 13:12

So when I was first a nurse, I became, it was an odd year. So I graduated nursing school. I got married. I got I got pregnant, and I passed my boards. Wow. Yeah. Easy year. Yeah. And so my first job was at Methodist and in labor and delivery, and I really loved it really, really loved it. But once again, when I got pregnant, I quit taking my medicine. So I was learning about labor and delivery. And I couldn't I couldn't grasp how to how to figure out how many centimeters do they dilated because it's kind of like I was concentrating on too many things. They're finally it snapped, I got everything. And it just kind of like all fell into place. When it happened, you know, once I started understanding, but now I was really having to control my thoughts because and you know, in my mind because it was racing. Mm hmm. There was nothing to settle it down. So it was kind of like me having to talk me down. Interesting because once I kind of, I guess I got a taste of the good, or the right wife, you know how it's really supposed to be? Uh huh. And then when it got taken away from me when I got pregnant, it was like, Oh, no, here we go again. Mm hmm. But now I think I was getting I was like, 24 now 20 Yeah. 24 And so now, I was kind of getting used to or starting to understand how to talk through it and in with me in my mind. And yeah, kind of like myself,

Betsy Furler 15:05

you were able to coach yourself through it this summer. So how do you think that HD has hindered you and then also helped you in your career?

Liz de la Torre 15:20

So, I can't, I really can't see that it's hindered me so much. Because I've done a lot in my career. I was the nurse have been taught in the emergency room. Um, and you know, there, you're having to triage excitement. Yeah. I know, you know, you're having to triage and you're having to keep stuff. This goes here and this goes there. And so I think it really helped me. A lot of and after that a lot of my jobs. They've been, like the nurse manager for home health, always with infusion. Mm hmm. I've always had to, you know, once again, triage what's important who's got to be seen. Where are we going? What part of the city? And then if there weren't nurses, I had to, you know, I'd have to jump in and go see patients. Mm hmm. And then come home and do my come back and do my desk job. So it was, I can't say it's hindered me.

Betsy Furler 16:21

It sounds like it sounds like nursing, you somehow just fell into a job that's perfect for you.

Liz de la Torre 16:31

I think so. I mean, it's always like, like you said, it's a fast pace. Everybody's different, you know, from what we're treating now. As opposed to you know how it was before when we were doing home health. there was all kinds of antibiotics off TPN the total parental nutrition stuff I used to I was one of five in the city who used to put picc lines in at the very beginning when picc lines came out. Uh huh. So that was kind of cool because you get called, you know, can you go do a picc line,

Betsy Furler 17:04

blah, blah, and you go, right, right. And then that was also probably kind of good for you. I know with myself, I'm not diagnosed with ADHD, but I definitely like a variety of different activities. And if I had a desk job, it's kind of what I'm doing now, because I'm doing everything from home. But then occasionally, I'll get to go do something. And it's like, just having that change of scenery occasionally, I think is so helpful for just not getting bored and refocusing and everything.

Liz de la Torre 17:36

Correct. And I think if I would have had to stay home in the midst of it and when it first started all this the COVID I don't think I would have done well. I would have gone nuts. Yeah, because it was just

Betsy Furler 17:52

Yeah, that's a great topic to discuss here because we are still you know, most of us are still staying home. You've gotten to go to work or had to Get to work however you want to frame that. And yeah, so, um, let's talk a little bit about COVID and stay at home. How do you think you? What do you think would have happened if you had to stay at home and you weren't an essential worker?

Liz de la Torre 18:17

Well, I know what happened on the weekends.

I frequented the garden center and Lowe's almost every Saturday and Sunday and have a nice garden outside. I just couldn't do it. I wouldn't be able to just stay home. Uh huh.

Betsy Furler 18:37

Well, that's awesome. much weight. I've lost 25 pounds over the stay at home order because I started walking and then subsequently running because I can't stay in my house all day, every day and on the you know, it's like when there's nothing else to do. It's like at least I can walk around the neighborhood. Oh,

Liz de la Torre 18:57

yeah. I couldn't do it. wouldn't have been able to do it.

Betsy Furler 19:02

Yeah, that's really interesting. My husband also has ADHD. And he's also considered essential because he's in construction and as a general contractor, and I think it's saved. It's saved him. I think he would have he, you know, it's been very hard on him anyway. And I think it really would have been awful if he wouldn't have been able to get to work at all.

Liz de la Torre 19:23

That's correct. That's so right. Yeah. Oh, my God, it would have been dreadful.

Betsy Furler 19:31

And he probably would have driven everyone around you crazy.

Liz de la Torre 19:35

I would have my husband is one that can sit on the couch and watch TV. And it's like, how can you do that? Do you not have a bedsore yet?

Oh my god.

Betsy Furler 19:50

So and it seems like at the infusion center that y'all have stayed pretty busy the whole time that it hasn't really changed workload or anything.

Liz de la Torre 20:01

We got a little slower than we are right now only because of the chairs. Oh,

Betsy Furler 20:08

that was it. Essential distance between the chairs. Right, right.

Liz de la Torre 20:12

We should really have like, I think it's 18 or 19 chairs right now. But, you know, we're only using 13. Yeah, in a pinch, it's really should be 12. But in a pinch, we have another one. But we've stayed busy and we're getting super busy right now.

Betsy Furler 20:32

And that's also great for the patients because one of my big fears when all of this was starting was that Henry wasn't going to be able to get as big. And, you know, it was like, it really scared me. So I'm just so thankful that that it's the infusion center has stayed open, and it's been he's gotten his infusion every three weeks just like normal work. Yeah, I was so nervous that first time he went In about what it was going to be like, what, how many things was he going to touch between the front doors and hitting the infusion center? About the infusion center itself because, you know, I know how clean and careful y'all are. But I was worried about how many things he might touch on the way in and, but I now know that it's like, pretty, it's pretty streamline. There's nobody else in the elevator for the most part. And it's been great. So I'm so thankful that he's that, that y'all have kept on working and he's been able to get his infusions.

Liz de la Torre 21:35

And I'm so happy to see that he does bring scout with them, because then he can have the private room. Right? That's, that's the benefit. And that's a good thing, although we all love Scout, but the good thing is, he can stay in his room. Right? He can watch TV or he can do whatever he pleases, and I sneak in snacks and that's how it goes.

Betsy Furler 22:00

Yeah, it's been great. It's it's been his one thing one time to get out of the house too.

Unknown Speaker 22:05

So, right.

Betsy Furler 22:07

Well, Liz, thank you so much for being a wonderful guest and telling us your story and may and might inspire other people to look into nursing as a career if they have ADHD.

Liz de la Torre 22:19

I enjoyed it. I mean, it's been 37 years and I've never regretted

Betsy Furler 22:24

a damn. And it's a that does, you can do all sorts of different things like you are studying move on to move on to another one. So and how and

Liz de la Torre 22:36

when you think Ben Toby er has finally weighed on your mind. Go? Yeah, right. Next place.

Betsy Furler 22:44

One of our another one of our favorite nurses is actually working in benchtop er right now she was. She was the nurse that really saved Henry's life when he had his big psychotic event with autoimmune encephalitis. She was a ER nurse. At the hospital that we went to, and he totally saved to his she took a boy's life. And now she's been havin she's really enjoying the fast pace over there right now to Uh huh.

Liz de la Torre 23:13

Oh, Sam.

Are you talking about Sam?

Betsy Furler 23:18

No, um, no, her name is Lacey. Okay, so she's Yeah, so she was at Memorial city Memorial Hermann, when Henry had his big events, and he sat with him and when he was psychotic, she was she and I were the only people that could keep him calm. It was about her. I guess it was miraculous.

Liz de la Torre 23:41

Yes. He told me she saved his life.

Betsy Furler 23:44

Yeah, she did. She's She's incredible. And oh, my goodness, nurses have been really so important throughout his life. So important. And I know he wouldn't be here without so many nurses that we've covered. Across over the years, so But she's ever been to VR and she's really like, it's I think she's thriving even through all this COVID stuff. I think she's happy to be there and in the chaos,

Liz de la Torre 24:14

I think it can be really rewarding.

It really can, you know, it's got its crazy moments. And then you've got your moments where you say, What am I doing here? But there's a lot of good things about it, that there's so many people that you can help there.

Betsy Furler 24:32

Well, in one, we met a doctor who works at Ben Tom at an autoimmune encephalitis event that we went to about a year ago. And he was telling me, he said, you know, it's the best place to be when you have something like autoimmune encephalitis, because we don't have to worry about what your insurance is going to pay or not pay. That's true. Go for it. And I was like, Yeah, that's a good that's. I hadn't ever thought of it that way. Because of course, It's so scary to have to go to a county hospital and be in the midst of all of that. But I thought, wow, that that is true. That is very, very true.

Liz de la Torre 25:10

So soon as you get your diagnosis, and as soon as you are stable, get out, right.

Tell my insurance card. Here you go.

Betsy Furler 25:21

Yeah. Thank you so much for joining me. And if people want to connect with you, what's the best way for them to get in touch with you?

Liz de la Torre 25:28

Um, you can always use my email. It's a [email protected].

Betsy Furler 25:40

Awesome. Thank you for sharing that and thank you for being here.

Liz de la Torre 25:45

Okay, and thank you.

Unknown Speaker 25:47

Thank you, audience for listening in please.

Betsy Furler 25:51

Like, share, and review rate my podcast on whatever podcast app you're listening to. This on. Please follow me on LinkedIn at Betsy Furler. It's f u r le AR, or on Facebook at for all abilities also on Instagram and Twitter at for all abilities. And thanks for tuning in. And please join me again next week for my next interview. Thanks so much for listening to the for all abilities podcast. This is Betsy Furler, your host and I really appreciate your time listening to the podcast. And please subscribe on any podcast app that you're listening to us on. If you'd like to know more about what we do in our software that helps employers support their employees with ADHD dyslexia, learning differences in autism, please go to www dot for all abilities.com You can also follow us on Instagram. And you can follow me on LinkedIn at Betsy Furler. f as in Frank, you are le AR Have a great day and we will see you soon