In this episode of Fostering Conversations, host Amy Smith welcomes Utah’s First Lady Abby Cox to announce the statewide launch of the Care Communities program. After a successful two-year pilot with Utah Foster Care, Care Communities are expanding across the state to provide essential support for foster families and children in care.

Abby shares how this initiative was born out of a desire to strengthen foster care in Utah and ensure that every child has a safe and supportive environment. The Care Communities model surrounds each foster family with 8–10 trained volunteers who provide emotional support, physical assistance, and trauma-informed care. This helps foster parents feel less isolated and ensures children in care have healthy, lasting connections with caring adults.

Key highlights from this episode:

Statewide Care Communities launch – a first-of-its-kind effort in Utah.

The top three benefits foster families experience: emotional support, physical help, and positive impact on children.

How Care Communities prevent burnout and keep families fostering longer.

Success stories from the pilot program, including mentorship moments, adoption celebrations, and lifelong community bonds.

Practical ways listeners can get involved, even if they aren’t able to foster themselves.

Abby emphasizes that Care Communities not only support foster families but also give children the community connections they desperately need. This initiative is backed by faith organizations, nonprofits, local businesses, and state agencies—all working together to improve outcomes for Utah’s most vulnerable kids.

Transcript

Fostering Conversations Podcast

Episode 64: Building Care Communities

Amy: Thanks for joining us for Fostering Conversations. I’m your host, Amy Smith, and today we have our amazing guest and First Lady Abby Cox. Thanks for joining us, Abby.

Abby: Thanks so much for having me.

Amy: So we are excited. Today is a special episode because, there is an exciting announcement that Abby is going to share with us.

So go ahead and share that with us and we’ll dive in.

Abby: we are super excited to announce that we are having a statewide launch of our Care Communities program. So we have been doing a two year pilot, around this Care Communities program. We’ve had. Great successes. We’ve had some incredible stories. we are thrilled with the outcomes, frankly, of what we’ve been seeing, and we are ready to launch statewide, which is very exciting.

Amy: It is so exciting and honestly for me as a former employee, this is flown by, so I can’t believe it’s already out of the two year pilot and ready to go, so that’s exciting. So would you just tell us a little bit about why you started the Care Communities program, why you joined up with Utah Foster Care to create this specific program?

Abby: Yeah, so when I got into this position,and wanted to see where in child welfare, really didn’t know that much about it, but knew that I wanted to, see if there was. Somewhere that I could have an impact or that my team could really maybe help in ways that, that some of the other organizations needed.

And so for us, it was, it really was a learning thing. and the more I got into it, and the more I started learning about it, the more, I learned great organizations like Utah Foster Care and others throughout the state that are doing the really tough work of, Helping to minimize the trauma that’s experienced when a child enters, the child welfare system and all the touchpoint that come.

I often hear as I go throughout this work is, the system’s broken. And I always say to people, no, the system is not broken. The system is complex. It’s very complex, and people are doing their best in most cases, to find ways to help, children who have been, hurt in some way and need our help and that are the most vulnerable in our state.

so on the out, I started to learn and meet people, families. Current and former children in care, just incredible people that are doing this work together. And I realized , there was maybe one place , that our team could really have an impact. And that is making sure that we have enough.

trained quality foster families that are diverse enough for the population of our kiddos and that we can have a safe place for these kids to land. and we see it across the nation. We are woefully short of foster families. and it’s because it’s hard work, as you know.

and it’s, beautiful work, but it’s also anything that is worth doing is also gonna be really hard. and so a lot of these families that, that, are in foster care or have a license, they usually give up their license within a year. Again, as we. what’s hard is that, if we don’t have a place for these kiddos who have been abused and neglected to have a safe place and a loving and place where they belong, and they can feel that, that sense of safety, then,we’re in trouble as a state.

We’re in trouble if we don’t take care of the most vulnerable among us. So I had heard about this idea of care communities. I’d seen it in different places in the country where they’re doing little pockets of this, mostly in christian congregations in the South, and I thought, is it possible that we could do this here in the state and do it statewide and have a real concerted effort to make this happen?

And through our partnership with Utah Foster Care, through amazing partnerships with interfaith, groups across the state, again, we’re where we are right now, and it’s an opportunity for us to surround these foster families and take care of their needs as they do the really important work.

Amy: One of my favorite parts about care communities is that not everyone can be a foster family. I personally was a foster family for four years, and then our family grew unexpectedly, permanently, and it was like, we can’t foster anymore, right? Because. We’re ca, we’re tapped out at this point. but Care Communities gives everyone an opportunity to give back and to help with this child welfare system.

So that’s one of my favorite parts about it, is that not everyone can foster. I totally get that. But there are ways that you can give back big or small, through this care community program.

Abby: That’s exactly right. And Amy, what, first of all, I wanna thank you for showing out. You’ve been so amazing. You’ve been outspoken and helping people to understand not only the really tough parts of being a foster family, but really the joyful parts. You and I have had conversations about, people.

Scared to,have teenagers in their home. they have a preconceived notion of what that looks like or what that means. And you’ve combated some of those fears , but also not sugarcoated things and you’ve been really real, which is what we need. We absolutely need that.

We need both. We need to understand that these issues are not just our, foster families, that are doing this work, but it’s all of us as a community that can come together and help out. So to me, the idea of a care community where, through a congregation or a business or a neighborhood, we can have eight to 10 families surrounding these foster families that help take care of their emotional, their physical, and any other needs that family has.

Especially making connections with those kids in care sometimes, it’s just as simple as a child needs a positive role model in their life. And for them, this just couldn’t be better, to make sure that they have just a whole network of people that are in their corner.

Wanting them to succeed, and they can feel that. To me, that’s the Utah way. that’s Utah in a nutshell. We want the help and that’s the other, you said, no, not every family gonna be foster.

Amy: Almost every family that I know of that I talk to says I wanna help in some way, and I wanna volunteer in a way that is impactful.

Abby: And so to me it’s like it’s a no-brainer that this is an incredible program that people in our state are hungry for. They wanna be helpful, and now we’re giving them the perfect way. To step in a meaningful way that is, that has all the protections that has the training. this isn’t just, grandma down the street telling you how to be a better parent.

It is. I’ve been trained on what these kids have gone through and the best ways to interact with them. And the best way is to keep them safe and make them feel like they belong.

Amy: Yeah. I love that this program provides , that safety net. Like you say, it’s not just, okay, let’s just rally around and hope this works out. It’s no, let’s be trauma informed. Let’s help these individuals support this child and foster family in the best way possible. one of my favorite.

a personal thing is that one of my teens, who we had in care and she aged out, she’s having a baby and it was so fun to throw a shower for her and to have her tell me who she wanted to invite. And it was so neat to see that she wanted to invite the adult women on our street. And even some of those women were like, wow, that was so thoughtful that you invited me thinking me, Amy invited them and I said, no.

She invited you, she gave me your name, and I just think that’s what a care community is, right? That was an unofficial one for us. but that’s what a care community is having. Strong, good adults that are there for your big moments to come to your baby shower and to be there. And the amount of things that she got from these women, just she wasn’t gonna be able to go get all of those things.

And so the tangible goods, but also just knowing, hey, there’s a group of women that’s gonna come to my baby shower. That is amazing.

Abby: Yeah. I just think that’s the beauty of this program. again, it’s gonna be a little more organized than your unofficial one. and it’s gonna help people to understand, like I said, like I didn’t know that much about foster care until a couple of friends of mine in my own congregation, began to be foster parents.

and to me it is it was eye-opening. there’s a lot of just don’t say that kind of things that we can learn.

Amy: Totally.

Abby: there’s some things that, you’ve endured some, and it’s a way for all of us. We all wanna be supportive. I think all of us don’t want to say anything terrible.

I think we all have good intentions and wanna be the best support, but also, you know what? the idea that these foster families can also have, the parents can have their emotional needs met. We had an experience in our, one of our pilots where, one of the foster moms just said, you know what I really need?

I need a walking buddy.

Amy: Yeah.

Abby: I need somebody just to go on a walk with me every day. And to me, like, how beautiful is that? it’s so great. And there, there’s a dozen of like a million other stories I could tell. we had a single mom who was fostering teenagers. And again, the challenges and the things that go on with teenagers that are, my own teenagers, it’s and they didn’t have that, the background of some intense trauma and, And honestly, like she had her care community come in and instead of just coming in and mowing the lawn, which is great, would’ve been awesome. She needed that lawn mode. They came in, a couple of the male members of this care community, they came in and taught the teenagers how to mow the law.

And again, that, that was a relationship that, that these, there was a teenage, one of the teenage boys that I had never had. A real positive interaction with a male adult.

Amy: Yeah.

Abby: and to have that sort of mentor and then to go out in the world and have this incredible network like you’re talking about,to say, maybe I can have a job opportunity with somebody in my care community.

Maybe i. To go visit ’em on a holiday or they get invited to my big events and my special moments. it’s just, there’s just to me, this is Utah,

this is us. Supporting each other and doing it in a way that is organized and keeping kids safe from more trauma, keeping them safe from, any kind of harm that would come to them through all the protections that we’re putting in place.

By doing it in a really organized and thoughtful and, with the support of our. Public entities, our DCFS, the H-H-S-D-H-H-S folks, our agencies, as well as the legislature. we got some funding for this from the legislature.

We’ve had amazing private donations and helping get this pilot off the ground. We’ve had incredible philanthropists that have been supportive of this. We’ve been, had people throughout the state that are excited. To see this be successful and especially our faith organizations, our first Presbyterian churches who’ve been a part of our pilot as well as the LDS church and businesses that have been a part of our pilot.

and to me it’s just everybody wants to be a part of the solution on this and I think this is a huge way to do that.

Amy: Yeah, I love that it literally can include everybody. That is amazing. Something that when I started foster care, it, this should be obvious, but it’s not, and it became very obvious to me once I became a foster parent. Kids come into your home a stranger because there is nobody that they know that is safe for them to be with and that Is horrifying to me, right? If my kids were to be removed from me, do you know how long my list is of people they could go to? and kids in foster care don’t have that list. They have no one that is safe enough for them to live with. And if that doesn’t tell you that they need a community, I don’t know what will, like these kids need healthy.

Community. And so I think this care community program, yes, it supports the foster families, but it’s also giving these kids a safe community. And that is worth a lot.

Abby: you’re exactly right. and Utah has been recognized, throughout the country the state that has the most social capital.

So if you think about this, that means that, yeah. I had the same conversation with my daughter. We were talking about this.

I said, can you imagine that you had literally nobody? I told her like, I mean, Spencer and I both come from huge families and huge, amazing support, supportive, wonderful families, and I told her, I said, there are hundreds.

Amy: Yeah.

Abby: People that if we weren’t able to take care of you, that would take you

today yet, like right now.

I told her, can you imagine that same scenario where these children that come into care have zero. There’s literally no one. they have to be, taken in by a stranger, which again, we’re so grateful for and grateful that we have those safe places. But Utah, again, we have that most of us, and we are the lowest in the nation for poverty.

so I feel like it’s such a doable. thing for us to tackle that, that we do have this, like every state we have our struggles with kids who have had to be removed for abuse and neglect, but. we can be that caring community for them. we are a state of people who want to give, who want to be a part of the solution.

and these kiddos that come into care become the most vulnerable people in our state. Period. These are kids that are the highest risk for incarceration at highest risk for, addiction, at highest risk for homelessness, at highest risk for, Suicide, suicide, you know,all the really terrible things.

They are like literally at the top of the list, on all those stats,for risk. and to me that it’s just unacceptable in Utah. I don’t think we would accept that. I don’t think anybody in the state is ready to accept the fact that, there are kids that, that don’t have a place to go and don’t have a loving connection and community that’s ready to.

To help them. So to me, this is just accessing what Utah already does well and making it, accessible for everyone. to be a part of a care community and foster parents that need that is just a great, little matchmaking of the people that wanna help and the people who need it.

Amy: Yeah, absolutely. Let’s talk a little bit about, statistical outcomes for kids in care, of what the Care Communities program is doing. Can you tell us a little bit about like how many kids have been affected so far?

I just think it’s really fascinating for people to actually have a tangible number and understand what this is actually looking like, not just, yeah, it’s helping people.

Abby: Yeah. So we talked about the pilot when you are asking people to help fund a program, to me it can’t just be, oh, we think it’s doing great. We think it’s helping. So I knew that in order for us to be successful in this pilot and as we scale it statewide, we had to make sure that we were tracking impact, that we were doing this right.

So we had an incredible, in kind donation as well as, our philanthropists donating the, impact study. So company. So it really is that we did this in a really strategic way. It wasn’t just a feel good way.

so to your point, we do have some great stats and some great impact report from Sorenson that shows that what, what’s been happening, and we use that as went along in the.

Make changes along the way. we made big changes, and that’s what a pilot does. Like you’re learning what’s working, you’re learning what’s what you need to change. You’re learning about who, who wants to be involved and how best for them to be involved and to. To be able to do this. so we measured everything and we measured,outcomes and we’re measuring like how this is working out.

And then we also have all the anecdotal data. We have the empirical data that is helping us to understand not only numbers and how the outcomes. Again, this is not gonna be a super longitudinal study because it’s been two years, so we’re not gonna be able to say that these kiddos, long term down the road.

But we do know some of that, those studies from other places where when they have the supports, when those outcomes are really, are, much, much better. But I will just as far as the actual pilot, we did a two year pilot. We had, We had 26 total care communities and 13 of those are still active.

And what happens is sometimes that we get that, that family, they get stabilized, they get the help they need in the moment they get, it’s. Six months, maybe six, eight months. And then the family’s like, yeah, we’re really cooking now. We’re doing really well. And of course that community is not like disappearing, but maybe the needs aren’t quite as intense and that care community can actually move on and maybe help, another family.

So that’s why that number and then we plan to do, We hope in the next year to add 60 new care communities, and by the end of the next three years, I hope the stated goal has always been it that every foster family that wants a care community will have one.

And I think we’re getting there.

We really are. So to add another 60 this next year, and again, just keep adding those care communities and, again, the outcomes that we have a great, impact study, like I said, that we can share, but we’re seeing just huge impacts on these families. one. Again, I always love the stories ’cause numbers are great, but, the actual impact comes in when you actually see what the impact is on the families and the kiddos.

One of my favorites is there was a, their care community that had been surrounding this family for a number of months. The placement turned into a permanency, which means that, they actually had the opportunity to adopt this child. And the family, the care community went to. adoption to the court for the adoption.

tears, all the things. And then it was just beautiful. And then as they left the courthouse, the one of the care community members said, got concerned and said, Does that mean we can’t be their care community anymore? And of course, of course those connections are there and of course they’re gonna stay forever for that child.

And again, in a time when we need to think about our neighbors, we need to look outside of ourselves. We need to love each other in a better way. We need to see people and show up for people. No matter who they are, and especially people that are struggling, this to me shows the beauty of humanity and what we could be as people if we really come together and focus on the good and helping others.

Amy: Yeah. Some of the things that I think are important for listeners to hear is, Tammy, who’s over the program at Utah Foster Care sent the three, most positive impacts on foster families, and it was emotional support. foster families felt that they were seen and less alone, but also they felt like care communities.

their specific teams were less judgmental than their personal family or friends. And I think that’s really important. Family and friends aren’t always trained and aren’t always. 100% informed of why the heck we’re doing this. So I think that, these care teams are educated and so I thought that was really neat just to have, just having that emotional support because there are days I was a foster family where you think, why in the world am I doing this?

This was the dumbest idea I ever had in my life. So having people say, no, this was a good idea. This moment’s really hard, but you can keep doing it, is very invaluable.

Abby: Yeah. And and you say you talked about the, that impact and really the impact on everyone. to one of the numbers that, and I’m not sure, I hate to quote numbers ’cause I think we’re always changing and I’m not sure exactly where we are right now, but the last I checked we were about 200.

50 people that had been trauma trained throughout the state, and I know it’s bigger than that right now. But what happens is, to your point, is that every one of those people in that care community and in that congregation who’ve been involved in that, or the business or neighborhood, they are being trauma trained.

They are knowing the best ways to support that family and support that child knowing, not how not to. Re-traumatize or even cause just, some uncomfortableness around, you know what to say. And then a lot of us are like, oh gosh, I know they’ve been through a lot. I don’t know what to say.

I don’t know how to interact. and this just really helps people to be trauma informed, to understand the impacts of trauma. And like I said, I always joke that, ’cause I guess I think. Most parents have had that experience where either a family member or somebody you know, or somebody you’re in congregation in your neighborhood, like tries to tell you what you’re doing wrong as a parent.

And first of all, it’s never great, so just like maybe don’t ever do that. But also there’s, sometimes people don’t realize the way children who have experienced trauma. Behave sometimes in certain ways. and so you know, that regular oh, just, buck up kid and do the kind of regular parenting that you did, years ago, and it maybe doesn’t work when a child has had, those kinds of experiences. And so we do have to parent in a different ways, foster parents,parenting in loving ways. and we do have to figure out as community members the best way to support and interact with those.

Amy: Yeah, absolutely. the two other things that were mentioned as the, in the top three most impactful things about the care communities were the physical support, which we talked about, right? Teaching these kids how to mow a lawn, going on a walk, like actually being there, showing up. and then the positive impacts of that.

The care community has on the children in care, which we also touched on a lot, creating this hopefully lifetime healthy community for kids that haven’t had that. So I think those are really important to remember. Just, these care communities are invaluable to not only the foster family, but also the child in care.

Abby: and the care community members, I’m telling

you like the stories we get from the care community members, they’re, they are having beautiful experiences in, in, anytime you are serving or giving or you’re actually end up, better off than you started. And so I think that’s a huge impact as well.

Amy: Yeah, I love that. so we al already have to wrap up, which it always goes by so fast because there’s always a million things that you can just keep sharing and talking about. And this is such, I feel such an impactful opportunity for the state of Utah to be involved. It is a tangible way to give back.

so maybe let’s just talk about, how do you, how do we get involved? What do we actually do to. Become a care community. Be part of a care community, and maybe just share one of your favorite things that you’ve heard that relates to care communities.

Abby: Yeah, the beautiful thing about this program is, again, not everybody can be a foster parent, although we do need those and this, there’s a secondary thing where people who are part of a care community all of a sudden either maybe they had a license and are ready to get back in and say okay, if I had a care community, like I could definitely do this.

So obviously that’s great. Or somebody’s learning about foster care for the first time and saying, you know what? I actually am at a point in my life where this could be something that. That I could consider. And so of course we want that outcome as well. We wanna keep our great families and we wanna add more to them so that helps as well.

Be watching for us. We’ll be in your congregation, in your neighborhood, in your region, but also you can go to Utah care communities.org. great information on that site to help you understand how to get involved, what it entails, how to get your own congregation to, to get involved, how to support foster families in your area.

So that’s a big way to get involved. And then there’s a million stories. one of the beautiful things about the pilot was that my former director of First Lady initiatives after she left me to go be home again with her kiddos.

She. She became, like totally unexpectedly, she became a foster parent and their family became foster family and they were fostering this beautiful little 3-year-old. And, so I asked her, of course, to be a part of the pilot, and she was a part of that pilot, and I can’t tell you, it was so valuable to, to get her feedback.

And she just kept telling me like over and over again, I don’t know how people do this without a care community. And so she just, she got help with. Helping with her own kids when she had to take kiddos to therapy. you see this, there’s just a court date that’s gonna be really hard and a lot of our folks just maybe I just need a diet co swig on my, when I get back from this really.

Sub court date or I just need to debrief and have somebody to talk to. And that’s what we’ve seen over and over again in these, in this pilot. And as we move forward with these care communities, we see just this overwhelming sense of I’m being supported. I can handle this now because I’ve, have this help.

And again, the care community members are just finding so much joy in, in serving and connecting and making a difference.

Amy: Yeah, I love that and I could not agree more. I thought there was a really good quote from a foster parent. it says, all of a sudden there was this group of people that just wanted to help.

I just knew in that moment I wasn’t alone. That’s what I needed. They’ve just been able to do so many things I wouldn’t be able to do myself. And just as a former foster parent, that really strikes a chord with me just because There are moments where you feel really alone and you feel really overwhelmed and to take care of your own children and the children that you have agreed to bring into your home and care for.

And so I just think that, this care community program really is invaluable and is such a beautiful opportunity to, to the members of our community to serve, but also for our foster families and the kids in care to receive such kind and loving support.

Abby: Yeah, I love it. I love it. if I could just wrap every foster family in my arms and say, you’re not alone. I think that’s what care communities is are doing, and every, not everybody’s gonna foster, but every. Child can have the beauty of a care community around them.

Amy: Yeah. thank you Abby, so much for your time today on the podcast and for all that you do for the state of Utah, and especially for the welfare system, the most vulnerable kids in our state, it really is making an impact and it’s changing the trajectory of children’s lives. So thank you so much for all that you do.

Abby: Thank you, Amy. It’s been fun to be with you.

Amy: Yes, you too. If you wanna learn more, you can go to Utah foster care.org and learn how you can get involved. Thanks for joining us.

In this episode of Fostering Conversations, guest host Liz Rivera guides a powerful dialogue with Native leaders and advocates about the importance of culture, tradition, and belonging for Native children in foster care.

You’ll hear from:

James Toledo (Utah Division of Indian Affairs) on how culture provides a foundation for resilience.

Stephanie Benally (Native American Specialist, Utah Foster Care) on supporting Native children’s traditions in foster homes.

Craig Sandoval (Urban Indian Center of Salt Lake) on creating culturally responsive models for Native youth and families in urban Utah.

Together, they reflect on the sacred role of clans, ceremonies, and language, as well as the ongoing significance of the Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA) in preserving tribal sovereignty and protecting children’s cultural identity.

Listeners will learn why everyday practices—from observing ceremonies to speaking Native languages—help children thrive, and how foster parents can honor and support these connections, even outside of tribal communities.

Transcript:

Liz: [00:00:00] On today’s episode, you’ll hear how cultural traditions give Native children strength and belonging, and why the Indian Child Welfare Act or ICWA is so critical , in protecting those connections for children in foster care. Welcome to Fostering Conversations. I’m your host, Liz Rivera, filling in for Amy Smith. We have a special episode for you today. We’re weaving together conversations with several native leaders and advocates here in Utah.

Liz: Let’s begin with introductions in Navajo culture, introductions are not just about your name, they’re about where you come from, your clans, your language, and [00:01:00] lineage. First, we’ll hear from James Toledo from the Utah Division of Indian Affairs, followed by Stephanie Benally, the Native American specialist from Utah Foster Care, and finally, from Craig Sandoval from the Urban Indian Center of Salt Lake.

James: [Navajo Introduction] James Toledo

James: and, and again. Thank you. I, I’m a member of the Navajo Nation and we introduce ourselves, sharing our clans. So as we probably will talk about this later in the program, our clans are a way to identify our family relationships, connections with others within our community.

Stephanie: Hello. Thank you. I am a citizen of Navajo Nation. My clans are Red Streak people born for Bitter Water. My maternal grandfather is Mexican People clan, and my paternal grandfather is Red House. Thank you very much for the opportunity to participate on the podcast.

Craig: Hello everybody, and wanted [00:02:00] to introduce myself and my native language. First [Navajo introduction].

Craig: So I introduced myself in my native Navajo language. Just wanted to reintroduce myself in English for all the non Navajo speakers. Good day to everybody. My name is Craig Sandoval, and I’m originally from New Mexico in a small community named Pueblo Pintado, New Mexico. So it’s [00:03:00] just west of Albuquerque, made about two hours.

Craig: And my clans are Near the Water People. I’m born for the Mexican clan. My maternal grandparents are the Red Paint People, and my paternal grandparents are the Towering House People. And so that’s who I am, and that’s where I come from. And then now I’m here in Salt Lake working to provide a culturally responsive clinical model for our community here to bring the reservation teachings and bring them here into the valley so that there’s still a connection. I came to Utah about two years ago working with the Urban Indian Center of Salt Lake.

Liz: As Craig shares, , staying connected to traditions and language is essential for native children. Even here in urban areas of Utah where families may live far from their tribal homelands. James adds that culture, gives children a foundation to thrive. While [00:04:00] Stephanie reminds us how important it is for foster parents to support native traditions, sometimes through simple everyday practices.

Craig: The Urban Indian center, the goal is to connect our community members and our families to. Our tradition and our heritage back home. And that includes providing dancers, providing teachings, providing a class to where they can feel home, they can feel at home.For me, it’s the language, making sure that I can continually speak my language. So with the Navajo language classes, it does bridge that. When we think about Utah Foster Care and our Native kids that are in foster care here in Utah, how do we continue to bring them to connecting with their tradition and culture? And that’s also our goal. Several months ago, the Navajo Nation did a resource fair and one of the division directors, Mr.Thomas, [00:05:00] Cody. Who worked very well with Utah Foster Care really emphasized that there should always be a connection to our Navajo language, to our Navajo culture, to our Navajo environment, to our Navajo values, even though we live in the urban area.

Craig: That is absolutely true., And that’s how we’ll stay strong. And so during Mr. Cody’s speech, he asked those that have our children and Navajo, our children in their custody to reconnect in any way they can . That’s where the strength is there. And so we want to, as the Urban Indian Center, while we provide a lot of these events, demonstration classes on Navajo history, Navajo language, Navajo culture, Navajo dances, we want them to connect with our traditional ways in that way.

Craig: And so that’s the goal what providing all [00:06:00] the classes that we do at the Urban Indian Center.

Craig: It is very important to keep the culture whether something small as a bracelet, a necklace, that means a lot to a native child. growing up in a native home, there’s so many milestones and so many traditions that are celebrated. I wanna give a little bit of background on myself too, as well. I am Navajo, however, I do have heritage and lineage into the Hopi and San Domingos communities, and each one is very different. And I’m gonna give you a great example on this side.

Craig: As Navajo, we are born into our mother’s clan. I believe that’s number one. When it comes to really being, I guess it’s a. Coming to the earth is that you’re given your first clan, you’re you. You hear your first clan and as a baby they tell you that your first clan is this. Your second clan is [00:07:00] this. And that’s the introduction to the land.

Craig: That’s the introduction to the air, the waters, the clouds, the beings that are on earth. Your introduction. When I look into our Hopi side, we have a child is born and kept in a dark room until a certain number of days have come. They prepare, and within this preparation they do a hair washing and they wash the hair and say, you’re able to come to this land in this world.

Craig: And then they go out early in the morning and they introduce the child to the sun And when this happens, they tell the child that, here’s the sun The sun will be with you throughout from day one to the day of your death. They’ll watch over you. They’ll look over you, and there’s that introduction to the sun.

Craig: And those are some of the main milestones. And you have Santo Domingo who also wash your hair and receive into the world the [00:08:00] child. So those are your milestones. And when you look into Navajo specific, you then can go into, for example, everybody knows the first laugh You know when a child laughs it means that there is laughter in the world.

Craig: There’s happiness in the world, and you might think about it as a child has no worries in the world, but that one laugh has given the world what we call, or what we would call happiness. That child brings that, and they want that happiness to continue within the family, within the world.

Craig: And so those are some of the important milestones. And then you get to puberty, the milestones of the women going through the puberty ceremony cannot the the men going through the Sweat Lodge ceremony on that side.

Craig: Those are milestones that you have. And then overall you have the weddings, and then you have other things that happen [00:09:00] and they’re all different. When our children go through these rites of passages, there’s other small ones in between, for example, piercing the ears.

Craig: When we pierce our ears, it’s that now that the gods can hear us through that, we can hear them too as well. And so that happens at a young age, washing of the hair with different herbs so that we prevent sickness and illness and so that our bodies are strong.

Craig: Being a parent of a native child and a foster care parent, these are questions that you can ask like, how can I support? And I know on the reservations there are families willing to guide. There are connections that say we can help with that because they wanna keep the child aligned. They wanna keep the child connected to the traditional ways of life.

James: Culture sets a foundation really for any individual. I think looking at a [00:10:00] broader picture, we all were raised in certain cultures, whether that’s within a religious environment, whether that’s with our traditional teachings as indigenous peoples, or whether that’s just your own family traditions that we have.

James: So when a child is raised with that culture intact, it sets them up with a strong foundation. So as they. Get older and they start navigating and, and experiencing life. What helps to give them some guidance as they are learning about how to be an adult and to different situations that you encounter. And because when we encounter difficult situations, you immediately go back to Those core teachings. So I think that’s the importance of culture in the context that I was using it, is trying to broaden that perspective to help listeners try to understand why Indigenous families want to maintain that cultural connection.

Stephanie: So a lot of our native kids are being placed in non-native homes, and [00:11:00] providing that education for all foster parents is important. So they are aware of some do’s and don’ts, like for example. We had an eclipse and I shared the protocol what Navajos do for our foster families to ensure that the Navajo children followed what needed to be done during the eclipse.

Stephanie: It’s just also providing that information, so if they’re caring for a Navajo infant, that they’re able to do a first laugh ceremony or get more information to be able to do that. I’ve had a foster parent reach out before and wanted to know what needed to get done and. Directed her to a Native Elder in the community who was able to help her with that.

Stephanie: And so it’s just making sure that even though the Native kids are not in Native homes, they’re still being provided that cultural connection, even though it’s very limited. my hope is that sharing the cultural information, the foster parents will then share that with the Native children that are in their [00:12:00] home. Because it’s not just taking a child to a powwow or reading a book, but it’s the everyday living.

Stephanie: It’s a discussion around the table. It’s going to an event with the family and seeing other people.

Stephanie: One family was taking care of siblings from the Hopi tribe, and I was able to connect the family with resources so they would be able to go over the information with the children in their home. So hoping that will bring some connection while they’re placed in that non-native home.

Liz: I think even the foster parents recognizing the importance of it.

Liz: I mean, cutting over to what James said, I think the culture’s that it’s just like in our bones, it’s just how we live, and it’s so hard to. Apply that if it’s not really a part of you, but a foster parent who isn’t native, if they’re at least reaching out and they’re at least trying, that really does show that they honor where these children come from.

Liz: In 1978, the Indian Child Welfare Act, known as ICWA [00:13:00] became law after decades of Native children being removed from their families and tribes at alarming rates. Here’s Stephanie and James explaining the history and purpose of ICWA and why it continues to matter here in Utah.

Stephanie: Prior to 1978 and ICWA there was a 25 to 35% removal of Native children from their homes, and 85 to 90% of those children were placed in Non-native and non-relative homes. And so over that 10 year span, Congress studied the removal of Native children. Found that there was a need for the federal law based on the study and the testimonies from the families.

Stephanie: The Indian Child Welfare Act is a federal law. It is the core of ICWA to recognize tribal sovereignty. It also recognizes the important roles that the tribes play, protecting the wellbeing of Native children. It also protects the children and parents’ constitutional rights.

Stephanie: ICWA applies to children under the age of [00:14:00] 18. The child can either be a member of a federally recognized tribe or eligible for enrollment. Eligible for enrollment means that one of the birth parents is an enrolled member with a federally recognized tribe.

Stephanie: Federally recognized tribe is a Native American or an Alaska native tribe entity that recognizes as having a government to government relationship with the United States. If the child is a part of a state tribe, they would not fall under the ICWA law.

James: Well, as you know, with history of Native Americans, with our government, hasn’t been the best ’cause.

James: You can go back to the boarding school era where children were forced to attend federally managed boarding schools. And the intent at that time was to destroy the culture, destroy the connection to culture, and so as kids were going through these various boarding schools, they were taught a different way of life and removed from their family and and [00:15:00] cultural settings.

James: I mean, that’s a really brief summary. This could be an entire podcast series if we really wanted to dive into that history. But to go back to your point when it comes to the foster care system or why ICWA was created, as Stephanie had mentioned, there was a history of state child welfare agencies where Natives children were being forcefully taken from their families.

James: In some instances, it was minor infractions. For whatever reason, these children were removed and placed into foster care. Some of them were put in through the adoption system. Hence, this was an ongoing challenge that many Native communities were experiencing and it, it caught the attention of Congress and there was a series of public hearings that Congress put on, and so this was an opportunity for those families to share their experiences and the challenges and obstacles that they were experiencing.

James: Those testimonies are what led to the creation of ICWA ICWA [00:16:00] Was created to try to help to preserve that and to ensure that those cultural teachings would be able to be shared with future generations and to ensure that we as Indigenous people are still here.

Liz: Almost two years ago, they tried to codify ICWA into state law and tell us a little bit about why they thought that was necessary.

James: So Representative Watkins at the time was the lead sponsor of the state bill, and the reason this was being pushed forward by the tribes in Utah was because at the time there was a case that was going before the US Supreme Court.

James: That was on ICWA So there was a potential that if the court ruled in favor of the plaintiffs in this case, then they would have overturned the law. And those protections that are part of that statute would have gone away. And so there was an effort at the state level to codify the spirit of the [00:17:00] law, so to speak, and make sure that is preserved care at the state of Utah.

James: There was a lot of support for the bill. We went through several revisions. The tribes were heavily involved throughout that process, but unfortunately it still ran into resistant in the legislature.

James: It did not pass. I think the tribes are talking about reintroducing the law again, presently, the Supreme Court has ruled and they basically upheld.

James: I think there’s a desire to learn. It’s a complex issue, and as you talk with people, you’re going to have to approach that in unique ways because it is a complex topic and it’s not a one size fits all, or my perspective isn’t the be all perspective out there. And so I think as, um, people are curious, I would encourage people to read up more about the history behind the law, why it became a law.

James: Also, if they have further questions, if they [00:18:00] have indigenous friends or connections to that way, then I think it would be appropriate to have those conversations or try to educate themselves as as best as they can, and maybe contacting Stephanie at a public event or. There are ways to continue to learn and try to understand the purpose of the law and why many indigenous communities are fighting to preserve this legislation.

Liz: Does the Utah Division of Indian Affairs, do they ever get involved in foster care cases?

James: Good question. So my office, we are not involved in the child welfare process at all. We do get phone calls from community members inquiring, but we refer those inquiries to, uh, DCFS. So within DCFS, there is a, ICWA coordinator who works directly on these matters in these cases, and so.

James: We would refer them to contact DCFS to speak with that ICWA administrator who can guide them through the process. [00:19:00] We do try to give them as much information as we can. We do share resources, Utah Foster Care and other legal services generally that provide legal assistance or can answer some of those legal questions.

Liz: Of course, even with protections in place, the realities aren’t always easy. Many families, even in Salt Lake, may not have the resources to be near or return to their ancestral homes in traditions. And though ICWA cases can be complex, the goal is always to place Native children with family first or in Native homes whenever possible.

Stephanie: Any time there is reason to believe that there is a native child when the investigation is happening and someone says, I believe my grandmother is a Native American, even with that reason to believe they need to treat the.

Stephanie: Case as an ICWA case, so DCFS notifications will then go out to the tribe and then it will be the tribe who will then to determine if the child is a member [00:20:00] or eligible for enrollment. While that’s taking place, the state will then try to find a native home for the native children. So under ICWA there is a foster placement preference, and it would be family first, and then it would be with, um, foster parent of the same tribe. And then the third one would be from a different tribe. And then the last placement would be to any open foster home that’s available.

Craig: there’s

Craig: multiple reservations in the United States. And one that is particularly for the Navajo reservation. . So the Navajo people were put on this land, on our homeland, and it goes back to the history of how we have our ancestral homeland.

Craig: Where we emerged, we came to our mother earth, and the deities at that time said, this will be where you will live. This will be your homeland. So our ancestral homeland became the boundaries, became the four sacred mountains. So we have to keep that in [00:21:00] mind.

Craig: Before lines were made by the US government, there was our ancestral homeland, and the boundaries were created with four sacred mountains and with two mountains in the middle that serve as our central location. ? So that’s our ancestral homeland. However, during the 1860s, we were removed from our land and put onto a different reservation in New Mexico. , We were released due to whatever political reasons that was, and a treaty was formed. And with that treaty, what a struck of a pin, we were given four diagonal lines and said, this is your reservation. And throughout the next couple of years. With new presidents coming in and out of office with executive orders, our reservation grew, but it still stayed inside our ancestral homeland boundaries, and I think we’re grateful for that.

Craig: Yeah, other tribe have different experiences. Some [00:22:00] did stay on their ancestral land, some did leave their ancestral land and put onto reservations. However, as the Navajo people we’re very fortunate to have returned and the government really accept that we return to our ancestral lands, we’re very thankful for that, that we return to our ancestral lands.

Craig: So when I say reservations, and when I say on our ancestral lands, it’s where we call home. The land that we call home. The land that times the Navajo names. For example, our four sacred mountain.

Craig: When we hear that, we hear home. A lot of our urban community members here in Salt Lake don’t have the resources at times, the needs or even the transportation to go home. Because you look at it, the Navajo nation as the almost from eight to 10 hours away, depending on where you live, and maybe even more.

Craig: And our community members do want to keep that [00:23:00] connection. And the Urban Indian Center understands that. And I understand it because I was raised on the reservation and I, I moved to an urban area to where I don’t have the connection.

Liz: The good news is there are resources right here in Utah for Native children. The Urban Indian Center in Salt Lake City offers language classes, cultural events, and outreach to help children and families stay connected. Utah Foster Care also provides similar opportunities from cultural education to community events like the Indigenous Foster Care Fashion Show and the Moccasin Run-in White Mesa.

Stephanie: As I mentioned before, there is a shortage of native foster homes.

Stephanie: Being very present in the community is important. Being at the table when it comes to policy making, meeting with the tribes and making those connections with the community is important.

Stephanie: So they are aware that there is a need that. If they’re not able to foster, then there’s other ways to support our Native kids through the Cedar Project or provide [00:24:00] support to our foster families. And again, it’s just coming up with unique ideas of recruitment. We collaborated with James’ office in Ute Mountain Ute years ago and have an Annual Moccasin Run that we hold in White Mesa, Utah every year to bring awareness.

Stephanie: And just coming up with different types of events who bring the community together to make sure that our Native kids have that cultural connection. And that’s why it’s important to be considered a, a kinship placement or a foster placement.

Craig: With families that don’t have that tie. First of all, you have resources in your state, and some of these resources are at the state level.

Craig: I know Utah. Does have the eight tribes in Utah. However, there are also the urban areas. For example, one can start from the State Department of Indian Affairs, and then Indian Affairs can guide you to other resources in the areas such as the Urban Indian Center. The Urban Indian [00:25:00] Center can provide many of those resources to as well.

Craig: They can provide, this is what this tribe is, what this other tribe is, and how they’re unique from one another. What the Urban Indian Center and how it’s unique too, is also that they have employees that are employed from different tribes, so the navigation there also can span out even more. Sure. But.

Craig: Another area is that each of the tribes have their own program. The social services programs, the tribal historic preservation offices, those are areas to where they like to connect the vital records departments. They will connect their, and we ensure that the Native children are connected to their native heritage and their native ways.

Craig: At the beginning when a family is navigating these, it might seem like a very scary thing to do, but overall, the community the Urban Indian Center, they’re [00:26:00] open to it. They’re open. Which way do we go? How do we navigate it?

Craig: And if we don’t know anybody there, you know, that will help you navigate. There’s always somebody that they will connect you. So I would really let the families. That have native children in their care to always reach out, Stephanie Benally is a great resource and she’ll connect you with any resources that you may have. And they’re always open to whether non-native, whether non Navajo. But they still have a Navajo child in their home. We encourage them to bring the Navajo child, their child, our child, to our home, their Indian center, and learn from us too as well, so they understand the importance of our Navajo culture.

Craig: We have our main location, which is on 120 West, 1300 South in Salt Lake City, hours from eight to five. Our phone number is (801) 486-4877. And we do have a [00:27:00] team there. So if you have a question. Reach out and you can ask for me, Craig Sandoval.

Craig: Or you can ask for our outreach department, Rhonda Duval heads that department. Everybody knows Rhonda. . We know her as Honey, but she’s a great resource too as well. Feel free to reach out to us so we can make some of those connections for you and support you as a parent, support you as one of our family members too.

Liz: These are all ways foster families can support Native youth in care. As we close, our guests reflect on the great work of families that foster Native children, keeping Indigenous people and culture strong, and underscore the urgent need for more native foster homes in Utah.

Craig: Thank you for the Utah foster care. Thank you to your team and also thank you to. Foster parents out there taking a new child, a Navajo child can have its challenges. It’s a beautiful thing too, as well.

Craig: And we wanna thank you. I personally wanna thank you. We wanna thank you [00:28:00] and always remember that the Urban Indian Center is a resource. You can come see us at any time.

James: I just appreciate having this conversation. I think it’s good to help your listeners understand this complex law, and hopefully this conversation today will give some insight and encourage listeners to learn a little bit more about this history and to try to better understand why ICWA was created and why many Indigenous communities around the country are working very hard to preserve this federal legislation.

Liz: We hope today’s episode has shed some light on ICWA and the importance of culture and connection for Native children in foster care. To learn more about Native services at Utah foster care, visit Utah foster care.org. You can also connect with the Urban Indian Center of Salt Lake, or the Utah Division of Indian Affairs for resources and support.

Liz: Thank you for joining us for Fostering Conversations. Together we can ensure every [00:29:00] child in Utah grows up connected to the rich heritage of their roots.

In this powerful episode of Fostering Conversations, host Amy Smith sits down with Sheri, a resilient young woman who aged out of Utah’s foster care system and is now thriving as a leader at Angels Landing Foundation. Sheri shares her deeply personal story from entering foster care at age 12 after bravely reporting abuse, to cycling through 13 foster homes, and ultimately finding healing, empowerment, and purpose.

Listeners will gain insight into:

The emotional reality of sibling separation in care

The challenges of instability and aging out alone

The importance of supportive adults and safe spaces

How Angels Landing Foundation is transforming outcomes for aged-out foster youth

Sheri’s journey highlights the real-world impact of organizations like Angels Landing, which provide community, mental health support, life skills training, and financial empowerment to young adults aged 18–26 transitioning out of care.

Angels Landing Foundation: angelslandingfoundation.org

Follow Angels Landing on Instagram: @angelslandingfoundation

Big Brothers Big Sisters of America: bbbs.org

Learn About Foster Care in Utah: utahfostercare.org

Transcript:

Episode 62: Aging Out Strong

Amy: Thank you for joining us for Fostering Conversations. I’m your host, Amy Smith. Today we have Sheri who grew up in foster care and aged out of the foster care system. She currently works at Angels Landing, and we’re so excited to have her with us today. Thanks, Sheri.

Sheri: Thank you.

Amy: You have a really incredible story and I’m sure filled with also a lot of heartache and pain as well. So we wanna be sensitive to that. But would you just start by introducing yourself?

Sheri: Absolutely. [00:01:00] Like you said, my name’s Sheri. I’m 23 years old. Gonna be turning 24 this year and I , work at Angels Landing. I, that’s like the best introduction I think I’ve got.

Amy: I love it. So tell us a little bit what Angel’s Landing is for those who don’t know.

Sheri: So Angels Landing is a nonprofit organization that serves young adults from eighteen to to 26. And our mission statement is Angels Landing builds community centered on empowering young adults transitioning from foster care to achieve self-sufficiency and create a life that they love. And so that is absolutely something that I needed when I aged out of foster care. And it’s been an absolute great opportunity and another resource as someone who doesn’t have tons of resources, and especially that family unit. Having another spot is always something that creates [00:02:00] So much support in my life. And so Angel’s Landing been great and I’m excited to, to dive into what that looks like.

Amy: I love that. So maybe start by telling us a little bit about your story and how you found.

Sheri: I aged into foster care when I was 12 years old. My mom passed away when I was three and a half, and so she passed away in a car accident on Valentine’s Day,

Amy: Oh man.

Sheri: so it’s the love day. So I try to always look at it like all the positives, right? But yep. Lost my mom at three and a half years old and. I’ve

got a beautiful, twin sister and another big brother.

He’s about a year and a half older than I am, and then an older sister who’s seven years older. So there’s four of us total. But yeah, so growing up, um, didn’t have a, a mom for, for very long and, um, after she passed away, it was really hard for my dad and I have a hard [00:03:00] time saying my dad, but just ’cause of that, the trauma.

the history in there. Unfortunately, we were left with our dad and he was abusive and in all ways emotionally, but vocally, all the things. As we got older, I, I thankfully had other. People in my life that

weren’t that way. I had my grandma and school teachers

that treated me with love. And I soon began to realize how the way that I was being treated at home was very different from the way that I was being treated in other places. And I really liked the way that I was being treated in other places than at home. And at 12 years old.

I, I made the courageous act of turning my father in. That was a really hard thing.

Amy: Yeah, I.

Sheri: But it needed to happen because it was the life I needed, this life that, that, that love that I always felt [00:04:00] from the outside. And I wanted to live that every day. And so heard of this thing called foster care, and you get a new mom and a new dad, and I was like, man. That is exactly what we need. That is exactly what we need. And we’ll be perfect you guys. I promise.

My brother was really scared. My sister was like super trusting and so early morning, two hours we ended it outside of school. But as soon as That door opened, we went inside the school and we advocated for ourselves at 12 years old and what was going on and some situations that had happened at home.

And thankfully, after about eight hours at school the conversations had ended and the foster care journey had started. And it was hard. That was hard too, but it was much better than what we were dealing with before anything. Give me anything. Foster care’s hard, but it was better. And that’s how it all started for us.

For the beginning of that [00:05:00] entering of foster care and, not starting that big, that journey without a mom and then really not starting that journey, a supportive. Father figure that I could look up to I felt that foster care was our golden ticket, and it truly was in a lot of ways. I am so 100% grateful for foster care and yeah, it took me out of a really dark place at home and it was hard. And yeah, then the journey started.

Amy: That is, I think that’s a really unusual story. I think a lot of kids come into foster care and they’re trying to hide this trauma And abuse that’s going on and they’re not brave enough to go and tell a trusting adult, Hey, this. Is not okay. So I find that really admirable that you and your siblings were able to do that. That’s really amazing.

Sheri: Thank you.

Amy: yeah. The bio that you sent over before this episode, it showed that you bounced around quite a bit in foster care. Are you [00:06:00] able or willing to touch on, you know what, so you entered foster care and, and it was a relief in some way, but. What were the hard parts of foster care and where were the pains and the struggles in the foster care system?

Sheri: Oh man. See, there’s a polarity of the two, right? Yeah. Where do I begin? Is where my head starts, and I think the beginning of it is, I was eventually separated from my siblings. And, that’s very common in foster care. It’s not something that anybody wants, but unfortunately that’s just sometime is the case. And being separated from my brother, my big brother was one thing, but being separated from my twin sister was. S completely different.  She was the person that I walked into the school with to tell the counselor what was going on at home and she was the person I wanted to grow up with, as sisters do. And so eventually we had, I think about. Two foster [00:07:00] homes together about maybe a year and a half, two years until we were separated. And that was a very big heartache and super, super hard. Still something that today in my life and a her life that we are actively trying to create this relationship and.Kind of fix that gap that we got in foster care.

Amy: Yeah. I bet.

Sheri: Yeah. Being separated for her was, it was like a, it was like a movie. We had our hands like this until we just couldn’t anymore. It was the most dramatic thing you’d ever see,

Amy: Yeah.

Sheri: but just definitely shows how much love there is there

and how important family is. And yeah. After that I, I went through a lot of homes. Total. There was 13 foster homes from 12 to 18 years old. The longest that I was placed in a home was about 10 months, so never a full year in any home.That [00:08:00] itself created a lot of instability in my life. And actually before I, as I’ve been. This podcast has been coming up for me. I’ve been digging into my past a little bit and getting back into that little girl who was living in that.And something that, I’ve realized and I’ve learned is I’ve kept a ton of journals. That was, That was my outlet, that was the person that I confided in, was my journal. ’cause there were so many therapists, there were so many foster parents. And so the one person that always stuck with me was my journal. And so I’ve just got

Amy: What a gift to have that now, wow. That’s cool.

Sheri: Yes. And so being able to dive back in that has been such a eye-opening thing. But I’ve got about 10 journals just filled, and I’ve seen just through the process when you open this first journal of this 12-year-old girl, she’s so sweet and she’s excited and innocent and. I hope that I find my mom and dad and just [00:09:00] really have so much faith in that, and that’s something I really have always carried. there’s even still a little something in there still just that love and that faith. But. Throughout the years of foster care from 12 to 18 in those journals, you see this innocence this faith after the many homes to fade away. It’s just a little bit of the hardening. A little bit more of those guards start to come up after each, door of a home. And some homes didn’t work out because for my own preference, it was maybe that family was a very different lifestyle than I could. That would make me genuinely happy. Or, it just didn’twork out on their part too. I’ve had, there was multiple homes that I had that were, they were very young foster parents. One was 27, and then I even had a pair of foster parents that were 23 and being 23 years old now I’m just like. What in the world, where

Amy: Having a teenager. Can you imagine?

Sheri: yes. And so [00:10:00] I, I have so much grace now for it,

Amy: Yeah.

Sheri: but it was definitely tough. And so realizing that I needed a very stable and sturdy home and during that time, and it was definitely a rollercoaster for sure. I’d love to touch on my longest placement

For a little bit, if that’s. Okay, so my longest placement was In Salt Lake City and this placement was just after a previous home that I was potentially going to be adopted from. And this woman was 20, I think she was 27. She was the one of the younger ones. She was so amazing. The second I saw her, I was like, wow, she would be the best mom in the world.

Amy: Wow.

Sheri: And I spent four months in her home before I got moved and that, that didn’t work. And like I said, now as an adult, I’m just like, yeah, I totally understand. And she’s sweet. She’s told me you helped me [00:11:00] more than I helped you. And I’m like, man, thank you. And if you’re welcome,

Amy: Yeah, exactly.

Sheri: she’s a sweetheart and. All grace to it, it’s really lessons that I feel like we can pull from it, like for foster parents listening, like making sure that they’re at a age and they’ve got that experience that they’re really ready to take on that kind of a role.

After this move, I moved up to Salt Lake City, Utah, and coming from St. George and that potential adoptive home was in Manti. So I’ve only ever experienced small town.

Amy: Yeah.

Sheri: Thanks. And next thing I know, I’m being moved up to West Valley, Utah in, a very big city and I was just like, whoa.

And I was just had turned 16 out there just , becoming this young woman and I’m, I’ve just gone through all these homes and now I’m in this big city and I’m just like, holy moly. Life is wild. [00:12:00] But just always, still carrying that attitude of, just getting through it and I think a big thing that really got me through it was, of course my sister. Just having that person to want to keep going for and that person to want to be like, how do, sorry, gimme just a second how I explain this. Be a role model for her, because I won’t, wouldn’t want my sister to be sad. I wanna be a good, I wanna be happy, I want, so that, that can be shared and that can be, like, I’ve seen Lots of people around us, that just feel really sorry about their situation and so just doing, I’ve always had that attitude of just doing my best in. And being a light and just being as positive as possible. But after entering Salt Lake and going through about 10 homes at this point and leaving a home, I didn’t get adopted in. I was feeling pretty, [00:13:00] pretty sad. And then being this big city, just feeling like really small, big tall cities,

Amy: very overwhelming. Yeah.

Sheri: And actually when I got moved over to this home, half of my stuff didn’t get moved over,

Amy: Oh man.

Sheri: and so when I had been moved over, it was wintertime and up north you get snow down St. George, you don’t even really need to buy a big fur coat, you just need a hoodie and you’re fine. I needed a big code out there and going through homes and having this instability, something I had a hard time in learning was how to advocate for myself.

How to ask for help. And so I didn’t even think about asking my foster mom for a pair of socks and a jacket, and I didn’t have socks and I didn’t have a jacket. So I layered up five long sleeve shirts and I just got as warm as I could and I had my little vans on and I walked to school and I had to walk a while to get to the bus, and the bus would take me to the train.

And then after the train, you walk [00:14:00] to school and. After a few weeks of doing that, this was my first entry into West Valley. And the city was winter. And not having the the basic needs to feel warmth and how to advocate for myself. And I’ll never forget this moment. I love sharing it. And about two weeks of walking in the snow, each step just got more painful. This little cheery, like we can push through. It was just like This sucks. I’m really starting to say it like this is just starting to suck, and so I got to this point where I had to wait for the crosswalk and I raised up my fists and I finally let some emotion out and I said, God, could it get any worse than this? And a school bus drove right past me and splashed cold water all over me. And I said, okay, I hear you. It could get worse. But interesting enough, [00:15:00] I look at other kids and I would completely understand to com have a complete fit. At that point, I was so happy. I felt that I had just gotten an answer and that.I was exactly where I needed to be and that things could be worse and that things are gonna get better. And That really carried me through foster care. And yeah, just having a lot of that faith and, I eventually came back to St. George and was able to be with my siblings and went to a lot of different schools. I went to seven high schools total in just the span of four years. I have a lot of friends, a lot of connections.

Amy: yeah.

Sheri: I could, I take the pros from it. There’s lots of pros from

it and so I just really try to look at life that way. I think that’s the best way. For me, so

Amy: I think that’s actually quite unusual. I think there’s a lot of youth who experience [00:16:00] similar things to what you’ve experienced. They experience aging out. We all know the statistics. They are not great. So I think that’s really remarkable that you have been able to have such a positive attitude and have that kind of faith and have, you are a remarkable person that you’ve endured so much and you’re just keep going and you have a beautiful demeanor about you and you’re happy and finding the good. I think that’s really unusual and really beautiful.

Sheri: Thank you. It’s that polarity, right?

Amy: I guess so.

Sheri: I love it. I love it. Yeah.

Amy: So tell us about how you found Angels Landing and what that offered you and what it can offer other kids that are experiencing similar life circumstances.

Sheri: So after aged out of foster care I didn’t have the foster parents. I didn’t have the caseworkers. I had bills after I had bills and I had to go to work and there was no more school and there was no more hanging out with friends. It was time [00:17:00] to start growing up and it was time to start figuring out what life I wanted to create and make that for myself.

And so at 18 years old, after all those homes and all that, really it was. It was hard to transition into that. I, it took me a while. I think I still tried , be a kid as long as I could. I think the biggest piece of it though, was after finally getting out of, I wouldn’t say getting out of foster care because really the goal was to get adopted for me.

But that’s not the case for everybody. And so once I did age out of foster careI, got a job and I think the biggest piece of it for me was that once I aged out of foster care, I could now finally start to process all of it because being in it, there was no chance of that. Okay,

Amy: Interesting.

Sheri: so for the last five years I’ve been processing all of it. And 18, 19, you’re this young [00:18:00] still kid, right? You’re labeled an adult, but you’re still really a kid. And so just figuring that out and processing it all. But now that my frontal lobe’s getting closer to developing, that’s something I could, I’m excited about. But really I think just the time. It’s the time to be able to process what I had just went through and that was hard. Doing that alone at 18. Like I said, my mom passed away when I was three and I turned my dad in at 12. And so he was incarcerated for 10 years and that’s not a connection I’m willing to have.

And so there was no such thing as a parental figure in my life after foster care. And even in foster care, I had people I could look up to, but there really wasn’t a solid, too much of a solid person.

Amy: Right.

Sheri: And just to advocate,

I feel that this is something I would love to share is shout out to Big Brothers and Big Sisters program seriously be [00:19:00] because I’ve had a big sister from Big Brothers Big Sisters since I was 12, and she. Wasn’t my mom, know, didn’t have to take on this big duty, but she took on this role as a sister and she was my sister throughout foster care and, she’s still my big sister now.  And so she was someone I was able to really look up to and have that solid connection.

Amy: That is amazing.

Sheri: It’s probably over 10 years now,

Amy: Yeah,

Sheri: yeah.

Amy: and I think a lot of times we talk about in foster care, you just need one caring adult and it would be lovely to have 10 or 20 caring adults, of course.

But it sounds like you have that caring adult and you have that person who you can rely on. Maybe they’re not your mom, maybe you weren’t adopted by them, but you have that stable connection. That’s incredible.

Sheri: So it didn’t for me in this case, it didn’t need to be that, but it did need to be somebody.

That’s, and that’s so true that one caring adult. And for me that was Katie. Her name’s Katie, and she’s absolutely [00:20:00] phenomenal. And I think I bug her and call her as much as she used to try to get ahold of me when I was a kid. She’s got, she’s got her own now. Yep.  They’ve totally turned. I love it. But she’s, I say that she’s really a big reason of who I am today and just been able to be that stable person. So I had her in foster care after aging out, and she took me to get my first set of groceries, everything I needed, and laundry detergent and just all the stables like, here it is, this is what you need.

Go get ’em, sister. And she just totally believed in me and set me up for success. And yeah that was great. But like I said, she’s got tables of turns. She’s got her own kids now and. I was still very young and needed some support. And navigating that alone for some time in some spaces were hard, but very growing.

And that’s just when Amer clap happened for me and for, for Utah. And that’s when Angel’s Landing came around. And seriously, it was just like, wow, all my [00:21:00] prayers have been answered. When I was a kid in foster care, I always wanted to be a part of something that helped young adults that have aged out or just in something. And I just, I love the goal of it. It’s beautiful. And Angels Landing They help young adults that wanna create a life they love and former foster youth. There’s a certain, there’s a specific dynamic, this specific space, and I love that’s. That’s important to this community and that’s a part of this community.

And being around other like-minded individuals that aren’t defined by their past and don’t wanna be defined by their past And come together and and create the life that they love and have that opportunity to do so through different things, different resources, like Angel’s Landing has. Activities once a month. So that’s providing, new experiences that maybe one wouldn’t get to have.

Amy: Yeah.

Sheri: Going hiking to Zion or going boating out in San Hollow. They really try to incorporate these [00:22:00] experiences that we. Adults like to have and give our own kids and that really are showing casing that there is so much life to live and so much fun to have.

And that’s such a beautiful piece of just that community and get getting together. That just is really awesome. And they also have core classes. They do. Let’s see here. I just wanna go off of our website just to give some

real real service here. And so the biggest service of Angels Landing is mental health, because I know that, okay, these guys have been through so much, which is so true. It’s not a, it’s not a normal situation. And so being able to provide a space where that can be worked out and processed and free, it is such a resource. And so Angel Landing provides that and it’s absolutely awesome. They have really cool learning opportunities that teach different skills that any young [00:23:00] adult would wanna know, like finances housing wellness.Tools transportation, how to buy a car, what all of those things look like. Here are the tools. Here’s the information. And then after that, they provide that financial support so that, that gap can really be bridged and that opportunity can really be given because in a world that we are in, that’s something that’s necessary.And if there’s that, that beautiful, that leg up, that financial support with that learning opportunity, it’s. So awesome because it feels so earned and it’s just man, I’m really getting on this path of success here. Like these people are really seeing this, writing this, path out for me and giving this opportunity for me to have, and then of course, just that community piece with those activities.

So it’s a wonderful opportunity for young adults that have been through foster care and need that kind of support.

Amy: I think all those things that you’re saying, those are [00:24:00] things that parents should be teaching that role models should be teaching, that healthy adults should be teaching. So kids that are aging out, they have missed that opportunity and it is. Horrible. They should never have had to miss the opportunity. But having this program, this nonprofit that’s now providing these resources, that is invaluable and it’s gonna change the statistics of kids aging out,

Sheri: It is gonna a hundred percent change the statistics. And, I always say like you might be seeing and hearing one person right now, It’s, gonna be a generational thing because I’m gonna go on to teach my kid these skills and then that kid’s gonna do the same, and then those statistics will get lower.

And that’s just how it works. I just love it. I just, I love the mission of it all. It’s.

Amy: No, it’s, it is amazing and I didn’t even know it. existed, and I. I. have closed my foster care license, but. I have been a foster parent. And I think this is really important for foster parents to know about to teach the kids, show them this resource that they do have and [00:25:00] also to educate the public.

Kids are aging out with no support. Some kids are aging out with awesome foster parents, right? That happens too. And so just educating the public that this is a resource for. Kids that have experienced

aging out of the foster care system, that is invaluable. So

where are the best places that people can get information?

Do you guys have a website, an Instagram? What’s the best place that someone can reach out and find ways to get support?

Sheri: Yes, so we’ve got a website, angels landing foundation.org. And we’ve also got an Instagram, Angels Landing Foundation.

Amy: Okay. Awesome. So those are two really easy ways that foster parents or kids that are aging out or have aged out and need resources can reach out to you guys. I love that. On a personal note, I would love

to know what the outcome of your twin sister and your brother were in the foster care system.

Sheri: Great question. Thank you. Me and my sister live together now. We’re together

now.

Um, yeah, it’s definitely something that [00:26:00] we have to, really practice our, as just sisters do and family does. But on top of just what we’ve been through, it’s definitely been a learning curve and twins, but we love each other and she’s doing amazing.

She’s actually an Ayurvedic chef.

Amy: Wow.

Sheri: she’s cooking at a retreat center and diving

into holistic medicine and wellness and just, yeah. I think just providing the tools we can to

live our best life. That’s what we wanted when we were 12, when we were leaving our situation, and it’s what we still want now.And yeah just, yeah. I’m so proud of her and what she’s doing and I love that we’re both in this realm of kind of.Giving backand providing the tools for ourselves but also not being defined by our pasts.And I love how that shows light to other, other people. I I’ve had, there’s young adults that walk into Angel’s Landing and they say she was a she was in foster care. Like what? [00:27:00] They just can’t even believe it. And it’s like you have this light inside of you as well and you are capable of all of these things as well. And none of that is even the you You’re not your past. And so it’s just super cool to be able to round like-minded individuals and it’s wonderful.

Amy: I love that. That is beautiful. Thank you so much. And it truly is,as a foster parent who has had a lot of kids come through my home, it’s really remarkable to see. How courageous you are, how much you’re giving back the good that you’re doing for yourself and for the community. It’s just, it’s really remarkable. And I just wanna commend you on that ’cause you’veendured a lot. I can imagine. And you’re really putting your best foot forward for yourself and for others. And that’s, it’s really beautiful. So thank you for all that you’re doing in the community. Thank you so much for joining our podcast today. We are so excited for our listeners to be able to have the chance to listen and learn from you, and [00:28:00] hopefully they can head over to Angels Landing Foundation to learn more. If our listeners have questions about foster care, they can head over to Utah foster care.org to learn more.

In this episode of Fostering Conversations, host Amy Smith and co-host Tami Carson welcome Melina Moore, Utah Foster Care’s Volunteer Services Manager. Melina shares how individuals and organizations can support foster families across the state—not by fostering, but by volunteering.

Learn how opportunities like Kids’ Night Out, Service Saturdays, and event support offer much-needed connection and respite to foster families. Hear inspiring stories of volunteers making balloon animals, leading pottery nights, or helping families with yard work. Plus, discover how simple acts of service—like assembling connection kits or hosting mindfulness events—can make a lasting impact.

Whether you’re a student, parent, professional, or business owner, there’s a role for you. Find out how volunteers create meaningful connection and contribute to the wellbeing of children and families in foster care.

Volunteer with Utah Foster Care: https://utahfostercare.org/get-involved/volunteer/ Learn about Care Communities: https://mycarecommunity.com

Key Topics:

Why connection and childcare are essential for foster families

Types of volunteer roles across Utah

Training, background checks, and trauma-informed practices

Ways organizations can get involved

Heartwarming stories of impact and community

In this special Pride Month episode of Fostering Conversations, host Amy Smith and co-host Tami Carson (Director of Community Volunteers at Utah Foster Care) sit down with Adrienne, a longtime foster and adoptive parent and leader of the FLY Cluster—Fostering LGBTQ Youth.

Adrienne shares her personal experience raising five adopted children, two of whom identify as queer, and the powerful impact of simply providing a safe and affirming space. She speaks candidly about the fears some parents may face when a child comes out, and how acceptance, validation, and education can make all the difference in a child’s well-being and future.

Listeners will learn why LGBTQ-specific spaces—like the FLY Cluster—are vital. These monthly virtual meetups offer foster families across Utah the opportunity to connect, share lived experiences, and find support navigating the unique challenges LGBTQ youth may face. From casual get-togethers like root beer floats in the park to more structured peer support, these events are centered on building confidence, community, and connection.

Looking for LGBTQ Resources? Adrienne highlights the comprehensive list available at utahfostercare.org, including statewide organizations like Encircle and the Utah Pride Center. Whether you’re a foster parent, ally, or just someone with a heart for helping kids, there are many ways to get involved—even if fostering isn’t an option for you. Donating event space, sponsoring youth activities, or simply taking the Safe Home Pledge are all meaningful ways to support LGBTQ youth in care.

Tune in to hear heartwarming stories, practical tips, and how you can make a lasting impact in the lives of young people by showing up with love, empathy, and open arms.

Adrienne Shearer is a longtime Salt Lake City resident and foster parent who’s been opening her home to kids for the past 14 years. She’s adopted five of those kids and brings a wealth of lived experience to every conversation about parenting, community, and care. Adrienne also works as a Fly Cluster Facilitator and a sign language interpreter. When she’s not juggling schedules or advocating for families, she loves digging in her garden and soaking up quiet moments outdoors.

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This week on Fostering Conversations, Amy and Heidi sit down with Rachel Garrett, Utah foster parent and founder of Common Thread, a nonprofit serving teens ages 12–18 who’ve experienced foster care or similar life circumstances. Rachel shares how a small community event grew into a thriving organization that now supports hundreds of teens through joy-filled activities, life skills workshops, mental health resources, and trauma-informed mentorship.

We talk about the real-life experiences of teens impacted by foster care, the importance of giving them choice and dignity, and how Common Thread is creating safe spaces where teens can thrive. You’ll hear about the stigmas foster families still face, why trauma-informed language matters, and how you can help create lasting change—especially for LGBTQ+ youth in care.

Whether you’re a foster parent, youth advocate, or just curious about how to better support teens, this episode is full of heart, hope, and honest conversation.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Resources & Links:

Guest Bio:

Rachel is a dedicated professional with over a decade of experience working with Utah teens both personally and professionally. As a licensed foster parent, trauma educator with Trauma-Informed Utah, certified Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA), and former high school teacher, she has gained extensive experience working with youth in Utah. Rachel is the Founder and Executive Director of Common Thread, a nonprofit organization focused on helping teens impacted by foster care and other adverse experiences. Rachel holds a Master’s degree in Psychology with a specialization in Child and Adolescent Development. Her thesis explored the effects of trauma on brain function and behavior. With a passion for integrating the latest trauma research into practice, Rachel is committed to fostering healing and connection and building more resources for young people in Utah.

Transcript:

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In this heartfelt episode of Fostering Conversations, host Amy Smith is joined by guest co-host Jennie Shepherd, Director of Recruitment, as they welcome Celeste Edmonds—Executive Director of The Christmas Box International and author of Garbage Bag Girl.

Celeste shares her inspiring journey from growing up in foster care to leading an organization that supports children in need. She opens up about the impact of The Christmas Box House, the importance of keeping siblings together, and how small acts of kindness—like a stuffed animal or a brand-new duffle bag—can change a child’s life.

We also dive into the realities of foster care, the emotional challenges children face, and how anyone can make a difference. Whether you’re a foster parent, an advocate, or someone looking to give back, this episode will leave you inspired and ready to take action!

Topics Covered:

Resources & Links:

Guest Bio:

Christmas Box House Executive Director Celeste Edmunds understands what the children she serves at The Christmas Box Houses are going through. She went through it herself. Her biological parents were addicts, and her childhood was an ongoing cycle of police calls, fighting, and physical, sexual, and mental abuse. At age 7, Celeste was taken from her home and placed into a child welfare system, where moving every few months to a new environment became normal. By age sixteen, she had lived in more than 30 cities.

Celeste views her childhood as a difficult but essential growing experience. There were terrible things, but there were also caring people along the way who did what they could to protect and nurture her. She was author Richard Paul Evans’ assistant when he founded The Christmas Box International. She quickly became an integral part of its creation, helping to build and refine the original shelters for a decade before taking a new position in Corporate America. Working in the corporate world gave her valuable knowledge of a different kind, with experience in marketing (receiving Marketer of the Year by Utah Business Magazine), public relations, community giving, and team management. Combining her nonprofit and corporate experience, Celeste is uniquely fit to guide The Christmas Box International. Celeste is passionate about making a difference in the lives of youth and the child welfare system so that others may not have to go through the same experiences she had.

The Christmas Box International celebrates 29 years of defending more than 170,000 children. That is enough to fill Madison Square Garden more than eight and a half times.

Celeste believes that The Christmas Box International is more than a place–it is a concept where community, government, and nonprofits come together to bring the resources to children that they need. As a child who grew up in the system, Celeste understands the importance of providing these youth the opportunity for a better life by providing them with safety, dignity, and hope. Her goal is to give these beautiful children everything she wished for as a child, including hope for a better future.

Celeste released her book last fall titled Garbage Bag Girl. She hopes to bring more awareness to the issues that face children in the child welfare system and help them know that they deserve a childhood and are worthy of safety and love.

Transcript:

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In this episode of Fostering Conversations, we welcome Laura, the force behind the popular Instagram account @FosterParenting! Laura shares her journey into foster care, from a spark of interest as a teenager to becoming a foster parent and content creator. We discuss the realities of foster parenting, the importance of trauma-informed care, and the many ways people can support the foster care system—even if they’re not ready to foster themselves.

This episode is also a bittersweet one, as we say farewell (but not goodbye!) to our longtime co-host Liz Rivera. She reflects on her time with the podcast and the exciting direction Fostering Conversations is heading with Amy at the helm.

A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting by Sarah Naish

If you loved this episode, be sure to follow Laura on Instagram at @Foster.Parenting for more insights and real-life experiences from the foster care world.

Don’t forget to subscribe!

Episode Summary:

They discuss:

Angela also offers valuable insights into racial identity in transracial adoption and the importance of building inclusive family networks. Whether you’re an adoptee, an adoptive parent, or just curious about the adoptee experience, this conversation is a must-listen.

Resources Mentioned:

Memorable Quotes:

Angela Tucker Bio~

Angela Tucker is a Black transracial adoptee. She is the author of “You Should Be Grateful:” Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption. Her book was published in April 2023 by Beacon Press. Angela’s search for her biological family is featured in the documentary CLOSURE which premiered on Netflix in 2015. In 2022, Angela founded the non-profit, the Adoptee Mentoring Society to provide virtual mentorship for adoptees world-wide. With 15 years in child welfare, she has appeared on CNN, The Red Table Talk, The New Yorker, and more, advocating for adoptees.

Angela lives in Seattle with her Emmy-award-winning spouse, Bryan Tucker.

Ep 56 transcript

Episode Summary:

Topics Covered:

Key Takeaways:

Connect with Daniela:

Special Thanks:

Stay Connected:

Daniela is a self-identified birth kid. Her parents fostered when she was a child, and eventually adopted her youngest sibling. Having grown up in a home that fostered and adopted, Daniela was a temporary sibling to many children. Now, Daniela and her husband have children by both birth and adoption. 

While Daniela has a variety of experience in social work contexts, she has spent most of her career working in foster care and adoption. Daniela Coats is a Licensed Master Social Worker in the state of Texas. She is currently a therapist under supervision at Be Still Counseling and Consulting in Texas.  She has contributed to professional writings on the subject, and is the author of The Day Lily Turned (un)Invisible, a children’s book written specifically for biological kids in foster families.”