It's disturbing how we treat others who are sick.

How easily, we can blatantly disregard... forget about those who are sick. Especially, around the holidays and special once-in-a lifetime events.

For those struggling this holiday season... I feel you... I get you❣️

Remember, when you share those social media posts... that missing person in the photos.

The ones that were alive... yet you consciously treated as already dead. Because one day... those empty chairs, those empty seats will never be able to be replaced. 

For those admiring social media photos of families sharing family photos... that missing person, that empty chair, those empty seats. 

Those smiling on photos should be disturbing.

How can anyone smile and be happy with themselves treating those struggling that are alive... as dead.

Patients struggling medically... deserve better... a lot better.

You my friends deserve the best from everyone, especially during the holidays❣️

💞🕯💕

Free Yourself...My Journey

[email protected]

You can't possibly pass judgment on what you have not experienced.

Unless you have been or are in someone's shoes...

It takes a lot of bravery to share one's journey.

👍✌️✌️👍

Free Yourself...My Journey 

[email protected]

Thankfully, I have three appointments with my therapist next week to address this holiday gloom.

Seems... the closer the holidays get, the more all this new complete change in my life... hits me. Then... 

My mind starts racing, replaying everything like a movie over and over and over again. What could I have done differently? Why did I not defend myself with everything I got?. Why, what, why, what?. Then the anxiety hits. Sometimes... followed with panic attacks. 

In the evening... when I am so exhausted, that I finally lay down... the gloom hits. My therapist calls it, depression. Because I'm not familiar with this new feeling... it's hard for me to understand, why I feel the way I do?.

When you stop constantly living in fear, panic and on the edge... the fog clears, and you are able to finally grasp what you have gone through. For myself, over a decade... and it's not been easy.

At least, I kicked myself in the butt today... did something fun, festive for myself and my never faltering, Snoreo. 

Sometimes... 

You just have to force yourself.

🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

Free Yourself...My Journey

[email protected]

A disrupted sense of trust – in yourself, in others, in the world.

Difficulty dating and forming healthy relationships. Increased risk for psychiatric disorders, such as anxiety, panic, depression, among others.

***

Locks on the front gates aren't enough for me... lions on guard would make me feel less on edge. Less to worry about triggers. To help me feel at peace. 

🦁😶‍🌫️🦁

Free Yourself...My Journey

[email protected]

The holidays can bring with it... reminders of not-so-great tidings of past and present joy. I have found over the years what has helped me to get by...

🎄🎄😶‍🌫️🎄🎄

 Spending some happy time, creating happy memories with my fur kiddos. Baking something sweet! Listening to some classical holiday tunes with the volume turned up! Picking a new place to drive to and view all the pretty lights. Opening up Christmas cards while watching old holiday cartoons and movies. Or... just picking up the phone and letting the person or persons who caused you hurt, know just how you really feel about their ill behavior😆😁😉! If all else fails, send your spiteful family member a bill for $25001.01.

In all seriousness...

 Know you're not alone this holiday season, because not everything is always silver and gold.

👇💞 Time to open holiday cards, yes! he really does look at all the cards and photos!

👇 Happy Snoreo after fun football play time with mommy 🐶

 The Samaritans HelpLine

1-877-870-4673

Any adult feeling isolated, depressed or suicidal can reach out anytime to Samaritans for support.

 *It's confidential and free to use*

💙🎄😔😶‍🌫️✌️🎄💙

Free Yourself...My Journey

[email protected]

And...

I did just that today!

Early next week, I have a phone appointment scheduled with disability. At least today, they approved sending questionnaires and requesting letters from my lead specialists. Valid reasons on my end, why I need to gain another work permit... expedited! Sooner, not later.

All I can do at this point is try.

My case manager made sure that I understood, "This is all really up to your specialists." 

Another avenue, I discussed today with a different part of the state, would require me to give them the okay to start pursuing legal matters. As they said, "You are in a position that no one should be in. But there is no turning back once you give us the green light." 

I did just that today...

Getting my priorities straight, not people. Doing things, making decisions, important legal matters for myself and my fur kids.

Sometimes you need to hear the brutal truth... the facts... in order to give yourself a swift kick in the butt! To get BACK on track!

👍👍⏳️👍👍

Free Yourself...My Journey

[email protected]

For myself...

It's been more than I care to say of WASTED...⏳️ 

⏳️🕑🕖🕢⌛️

Free Yourself...My TIME

[email protected]