Apologies for the late Friday post - I have been a bit inundated.

On Thursday I wrote about the email I sent to the Board of Trustees of my former employer. I wanted to come back to answer some questions:

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Q: Why didn’t you name names?

A: Because it’s not about one company or what this company did to me. It’s about the level of behavior that we’ve been socialized to accept as normal in the workplace. It’s about the culture of silence that gets reinforced with every act of retaliation. It’s about the millions of people who are quietly enduring that which is annihilating their purpose, their sense of self, and their confidence. Collectively, we must not tolerate this kind of treatment - but that looks different for each person. I want to help individuals navigate these workplaces so that collectively, we can work towards a better culture in our workplaces.

Q: Why didn’t you just sue them?

A: When I left, I was a shell of the person that I am now. I didn’t get out of bed for weeks. I didn’t eat. I didn’t sleep. I was not able to take care of myself, never mind manage the flow of accurate information from my very fatigued brain to an attorney in court. I didn’t have the physical or mental stamina for such an ordeal. I don’t believe that is coincidental. The strategy of avoiding lawsuits for companies often includes mentally breaking down those who will accuse them.

I signed a separation agreement and agreed not to sue them. That brought me closure enough that I could take a month or so to try to recover and heal. That was my first priority when I left.

Q: You know you won’t be hired as an HR person after this, right?

A: That’s okay. I have bigger pursuits. And if there is a company that values integrity, honesty and their employees, then maybe it won’t look like something wrong, but rather something brave.

Q: Why are you so angry?

A: I’m not angry. I’m motivated to shine a light on things that happen in the dark, because things that happen in the dark, in secret, behind closed doors, when it involves the decisions around how employees are to be treated, what is sanctioned and what is not - that can impact someone’s life just as much or more than it impacted mine. It’s not necessary. Why not hold people accountable to some very basic standards of respect when employees are the reason that most companies can even exist?

Q: Why should we believe you?

A: You don’t have to. I can tell you that it’s the truth. I put my name to it. The company forbade me from retaining any documents - again, not a coincidence - so I can’t prove what I’m saying. And this is exactly how companies control the narrative. They control the documentation, insist on confidentiality and then demonize the person: The person who left and made accusations is disgruntled; The person who left had poor performance issues and they made accusations to distract and excuse their performance; The person who left was emotionally unstable and wasn’t qualified for their job anyway. Luckily, I was tracking things from the beginning in my personal files, so I do have quotes and dates, which I included in the email to the Board.

They will twist things around to avoid scrutiny on themselves while doing everything they can to scrutinize me. I’m sure that’s happening now. I don’t care, because this is more important than one company.

Q: Why are you posting your story now if you left eight months ago?

A: I was ready to let it go, honestly. Until a few weeks ago when I got a call with the message from my company that they were going to come after me “with everything we’ve got.” I will not be bullied into silence. They know that they can’t prohibit me from speaking about my experience. They are trying to bully me into it. And that pisses me off.

So I wrote the email to the board. Again, that was going to be enough. And then I saw something where the president was praising the CFO for his amazing work. The thing is, it’s not even about the CFO. It’s about the way they automatically dismissed the complaint from me, refused to investigate and then retaliated against me for a full year until I absolutely could not go on - the harm from which I will be recovering for a pretty long time. The bullies? Unaffected.

So I decided to make it public. It’s literally the only leverage I have. The Board needed to know what happened, so that the Board can be held accountable if the individual executive players are not and this continues to happen. Accountability comes in all forms.

Q: Will you tell us the name/names/Give us information about your former employer?

A: No. I have disclosed what I am going to disclose. I am not able to discuss anything, other than my personal experience at this company.

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