Therapist, author and media pro Kelley Kitley joins Alysse to unpack “gray area” drinking, stigma around labels and what long-term recovery really feels like — including a visceral craving moment and the simple, honest tools that kept her sober. They also dig into cross-addictions, perimenopause curveballs, parenting teens and how sharing your story (even when it’s messy) can change lives.   

Takeaways: 

• “Gray area” drinking thrives on qualifiers; clarity reduces stigma and increases connection.   

• Cravings can resurface years in — play the tape forward and “tell on yourself” to your sober network. 

• Sharing your story can be a professional risk — and a lifeline for others (and you).   

• Language and identity (“alcohol-free,” “sober,” “alcoholic”) often depend on social circles; choose what supports your recovery.   

• Perimenopause symptoms can echo old patterns; stack healthy coping tools early.   

Key Timestamps: 

[02:01] — Alysse’s Chicago intro + Kelley’s “grew up above a bar” backstory.   

[06:00] — Media hustle: pitching herself, "Today Show" bump and making impact.   

[09:08] — Making her mess her message: therapist transparency & the book.   

[18:32] — A real-time craving in a hotel — and the group text that saved the day.   

[34:23] — Labels, stigma and the “gray area” short film.   

[27:26] — Perimenopause, rage, sleep and staying out of old habits.   

Resources & Links: 

-Kelley Kitley: Website, Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook 

-Book: "MY self: An autobiography of survival" 

-TEDx: "I show my scars so others know they can heal" 

-The Kelley Kitley Podcast: America's Social Worker Unfiltered 

-YouTube: "Gray Area" 

-Meet the Contributors 

-Alcohol + Substance Use Disorder Guide 

-Recovery Nonprofit Resource Guide 

-LBGTQ+ Recovery Resource Guide 

Connect with Us: 

-Website: www.thesobercurator.com  

-Facebook: @The Sober Curator 

-Instagram: @thesobercurator 

-X: @thesobercurator 

-YouTube: @thesobercurator 

-Pinterest: @thesobercurator 

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About: 

Sobriety isn’t the end of the party—it’s just the start of a better one. Hosted by Alysse Bryson, media powerhouse and sobriety’s ultimate hype woman, and joined by Sober Curator contributors, The Sober Curator Podcast* delivers bold convos, pop culture deep dives, and zero-proof living that doesn’t suck. Whether you're sober, sober-curious, or just looking for good vibes without the hangover, we’ve got you covered. Subscribe now—because getting sober matters, staying sober matters more. 

The intro and outro music for this episode is proudly featured with permission from Avatari. All rights reserved to the original creators. For more of their work, check out his website: https://www.avatariworld.com/music. 

*The Sober Curator Podcast is a space for open and honest conversations about sobriety, recovery, and alcohol-free living. While we celebrate all paths to a sober lifestyle, some topics discussed may be sensitive or triggering for certain listeners. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. If you’re in recovery or exploring sobriety, please take care while listening and seek support from trusted professionals as needed.