Stop Asking "Am I Good Enough?" and Start Asking "What Do I Actually Want to Get Good At?"

You know that exhausting loop where you question whether you're good enough, smart enough, skilled enough to do the thing you want to do? Yeah, that shit ends today.

This episode breaks down the difference between being proficient at something and being sufficient as a human being. Confusing these two is what keeps you stuck in that "not good enough" spiral.

Here's the truth: You are inherently enough simply because you exist. Period. Your fundamental sufficiency isn't up for debate — it's already at maximum level.

What you're actually dealing with: Skills gaps. Just because you're not proficient enough at something doesn't mean you're not good enough as a person. It means you have some work to do if you want to develop that skill.

When you say "nothing is working": You haven't defined what "working" actually looks like. We're getting specific about goals, metrics, and what success means to you.

That impulse to over-explain yourself: It's often a trauma response, and it's backwards. When you think you need to convince other people, you actually need to convince yourself.

How to build real confidence: Stop trying to get others to believe in you so you can believe in yourself. Start doing things that make you proud, and watch your self-esteem grow from actual evidence.

Your new approach: Instead of "Am I good enough?" ask "Do I have the proficiency required to do this thing?" If yes, go for it. If no, decide if you want to develop that skill or focus elsewhere.

Ready to put this into practice?

Get my free FAFO Method Workbook — a step-by-step guide to designing experiments that build the skills and confidence you actually want.

Listen to episode 2 "The FAFO Method — Why and How to F*ck Around and Find Out in Your Business" (https://fckyeahpod.buzzsprout.com/2198615) for more details.

Prefer video? Watch the video version of this episode on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@kristenkingcoaching

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

How to Trust Yourself to Make the Big Moves (Without Needing Permission from Anyone Else)

If you're holding back on your business — or anything else — that's usually a sign you need to grow your self-trust. When you trust yourself to follow through and handle whatever comes your way, it becomes a whole lot easier to try new things and make big moves.

Here's the thing: Your self-concept — the way you think about yourself in the world — determines how much you trust your own decisions. And if you're used to outsourcing your validation to other people who don't know you or what works for you, it's time to change that.

The evidence is already there. You've made good decisions before. You've solved problems, hit goals, delivered on promises. But here's what happens: we discount our wins. "Yeah, I made that sale, but they're the one who decided to buy." "I completed that project, but it was really the whole team."

Sound familiar? We're trained from childhood not to be "too big for our britches," so we deflect credit for our accomplishments like we were potted plants in the corner when success happened.

Time to stop that shit.

Your new assignment: Find one thing you've accomplished. Look at it from an outside perspective and identify every single action you took, every thought and emotion involved, every piece of previous experience you brought to that situation. Show yourself with concrete, verifiable facts exactly how you created that result.

The truth: Other people were involved, but so were you. You get credit for what you did.

What you actually need: You don't need 100% certainty that everything will go perfectly. You just need to trust that you're someone who can figure shit out, that this is worth trying, and that when things don't go as planned, you'll learn and try again.

The more you intentionally look for evidence of your trustworthiness and fold it into your self-concept, the more you'll know yourself as someone reliable and capable.

Ready to go deeper? Book a private business intensive with me. Visit my website for details.

Prefer video? Watch the video version of this episode on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/AG07nRheqqc

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

What If Nobody Shows Up?

Last episode we talked about taming your what-if monster. This episode tackles the specific what-if that stops most people dead in their tracks: "What if nobody shows up? What if nobody buys?"

This fear hits one-on-one clients, events, classes, and launches. Like all what-ifs, the solution is the same: actually answer the question.

When nobody shows up to my fitness classes (yes, it happens): I use the time anyway. Work on choreography, practice moves, learn routines. I'm still there to do fitness stuff—just differently.

When clients no-show sessions: I use that coaching time to coach others in communities, write content, or coach myself. The time was set aside for serving people and moving my business forward.

When group calls start with just me because everyone's late: I teach to the empty room. Replay watchers get the teaching plus live coaching when folks arrive.

For launches that don't hit numbers: I extend deadlines, examine messaging, get curious about different results, give myself more time to sell.

Your homework: Think about what you've been holding back on because you're afraid nobody will show. Write those down. Then answer: "What would I do if nobody came/bought?"

Bonus: Pick one and go do it. Use this as a FAFO experiment. When you approach everything with the goal of finding out rather than avoiding failure, there's no way to fail—only learn.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Episode 4, "How to Tame Your "What If?" Monster" (https://fckyeahpod.buzzsprout.com/2198615/13387420-4-how-to-tame-your-what-if-monster)
  
  
• Episode 2, "The FAFO Method: Why and How to f*ck around and find out in your business" (https://fckyeahpod.buzzsprout.com/2198615)

Prefer video? Watch the video version of this episode on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/qI4Z5gZUvsY

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

How to Tame Your What-If Monster

It's race season in Leadville, CO, and I'm about to sing the national anthem in front of 3,000 people—the largest crowd I've ever sung for. Perfect timing to talk about taming your what-if monster.

(Side note: I didn't coin this term—it's from a kids' book called Jonathan James and the Whatif Monster that helped my kids work through anxiety about new things.

Here's what happens: Your brain goes "What if it doesn't work? What if I fail? What if nobody shows up? What if everyone laughs at me?" And instead of answering, you spiral into worst-case scenario panic mode and talk yourself out of doing the thing.

The problem isn't asking "what if"—that's actually smart preparation. The problem is not answering the damn question.

Here's how to fix it:

Step 1: Ask the flip side. If your brain offers "What if this is a complete disaster?" also ask "What if this goes better than I expected?"

Step 2: Actually answer both questions with concrete plans. When my brain says "What if we don't make enough money this month?" I have a list: get a part-time job, walk dogs, rent out rooms, sell stuff, pay bills late (spoiler: people don't die from late fees).

Once you have actual answers—even shitty ones you'd never want to use—the fear loses its power. You're not afraid of the thing happening; you're afraid you can't handle it.

But here's the truth: The only thing that stops you is you stopping.

When you develop the habit of answering your what-ifs instead of spinning in them, your monster shrinks from this massive looming force to a manageable six-pound cat sitting behind you.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Jonathan James and the Whatif Monster, by Michelle Nelson-Schmidt (https://amzn.to/4516Bjd)
• From Bankrupt to Badass with Kristen King  (https://brynbamber.com/2022/05/03/ep-84-bankruptcy-with-kristen-skove-king/)

Prefer video? Watch the video version of this episode on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/fXe0x-ZvJaY

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

The Truth About Business Growth (Spoiler: It's Not Linear)

We've all seen that motivational poster—the straight line labeled "what we think growth looks like" next to the chaotic squiggly mess that says "what it actually looks like." We know intellectually that success isn't linear, yet we still expect it to be for us.

This misconception is one of the biggest killers of businesses and hope I've seen in almost 20 years of doing this work.

Here's the reality: everything in life operates in cycles. Day and night. The water cycle. The economy. Your business will do the same—expansion and contraction, ups and downs. Sometimes bigger, sometimes smaller, but always cycling.

The problem? You're looking at the wrong timeframe. Comparing this week to last week or this month to last month doesn't give you enough data to see actual trends. You need at least 90 days of consistent action (hello, FAFO method) to draw meaningful conclusions.

Think of it like the tide at the ocean. If it only came in, it would flood everything. Instead, it flows in and out, in and out, all day, every day, around the world. That's natural. That's how it's supposed to work.

Your job isn't to never have slow periods or rough days. It's to get good at sustaining through the trough while riding the waves. Stop panicking when it's low tide—it's coming back in.

When you're in a downswing, use that time strategically. What do you want to regroup around? What's been annoying you that you finally have time to replace? What new offering have you been wanting to launch?

The only way you won't hit your goal is if you stop before you get there.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Episode 2: "The FAFO Method: Why and How to f*ck around and find out in your business" (https://fckyeahpod.buzzsprout.com/2198615)

Prefer video? Watch the video version of this episode on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/_Q6HUV7FPQw

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

The FAFO Method - Your Business Superpower

Meet the most powerful tool in your business toolbox: The FAFO Method. FAFO means "Fuck Around and Find Out," and it's the best way I've found to make meaningful changes in all areas of life.

Anytime you catch yourself asking "What if...?" or saying "I don't know how to..." that's your cue to bust out FAFO.

The 7 Steps of FAFO

• Step 1: Identify the question you want to answer
• Step 2: Pick a hypothesis to test
• Step 3: Design your experiment
• Step 4: Run the experiment (for 90 days - stick to the plan!)
• Step 5: Conclude and document results
• Step 6: Evaluate and draw conclusions
• Step 7: Repeat with new hypothesis or experiment

Your Stress-Free Scorecard

When evaluating results, ask yourself:

• What did I SAY I was going to do?
• What did I ACTUALLY do?
• How closely did I follow the original plan? (1-10 scale)
• How do I feel about the difference?
• What helped me? What got in the way?
• How will I use what I learned next?

The Change Framework Tripod

FAFO works best with my three-legged change framework:

1. Commitment - Know what you want and why it matters
2. Non-attachment - Stay curious, don't get hung up on specific outcomes
3. FAFO - Actually do the damn thing

Remove any leg and the whole thing falls over. But when you use all three together, lasting change isn't just possible - it's inevitable.

Here's the beautiful part: When the game is "fuck around and find out," there's literally no way to lose. If you found out, you nailed it.

Time to FAFO away!

Thanks to Samantha W. for the unexpectedly perfect audio clip that fit so beautifully with this episode. Shared with permission of course!

Prefer video? Watch the video version of this episode on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/BMJhLX_Ysuo

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

From "I Could Never" to "Fuck Yeah"

Welcome to the very first episode! I'm coming to you from 10,200 feet up in Leadville, Colorado, finally doing the thing I've been avoiding for way too long.

After almost 20 years in the online content space, you'd think I would've started a podcast ages ago. But here's what was holding me back - and it might be holding you back too: I had convinced myself that podcasting was for other people, not me.

Sound familiar? That little voice that says "Oh God, I could never..." about things you actually want to do?

The "I Could Never" Rule

Here's what changed everything: I made a rule. Anytime I catch myself thinking "I could never" about something I actually want to do, I have to go do it. (If it's something I genuinely don't want, that's different - we're not forcing ourselves into shit we hate.)

When you start doing things you've told yourself you "could never" do, it's going to feel uncomfortable as hell. Your brain is literally reorganizing around this new identity - going from someone who "could never" to someone who actually can and is.

"Fuuuuuck" vs "Fuck No"

You need to learn the difference between:

• "Fuuuuuck" - This is scary/new/hard but I want to do it (keep going)
• "Fuck no" - This is absolutely not for me (full stop)

Think exercise training. There's growth discomfort versus actual pain. One you push through, the other you don't.

Your Awareness Develops Backwards

As you start recognizing these patterns, you'll notice them faster and faster. First years later, then months, weeks, days, then right in the moment, and eventually before it starts.

This is how you rewire your brain. Not by beating yourself up for past decisions, but by using that awareness as education for what's happening now.

The journey from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" starts with recognizing where you're holding yourself back right now.

Prefer video? Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/PDbOBVAab00

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

In a world where entrepreneurs are burned out from spending thousands of dollars on shit they don't even need that left them feeling even more like a failure, a new wind is about to blow. 🌬️💨
From the brilliant mind that brought you an entire business strategy based on fucking around and finding out, and a pug named Steve Buscemi, comes "From F*ck Me to F*ck Yeah," a journey to help get your head outta your ass and stop torturing yourself with your business.
Meet Kristen King, your new favorite bad influence. You definitely want Kristen to rub off on you.
But you don’t have to take her word for it. Kristen’s clients, colleagues, and friends are happy to tell you alllllll about her in this epically silly, delightfully heartfelt, decidedly PG-13+ trailer. 🖕🏻

🎥 🎬 Check out the full magical experience on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9kpyi7b2j0 🎥 🎬
✨✨✨✨✨ Be sure to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite pod platform so you don’t miss the regular weekly episodes beginning July 20: https://bit.ly/fckyeahpod ✨✨✨✨✨
Massive thanks to everyone who contributed to this cinematic masterpiece, especially video-editing genius and voiceover provider Carlos de la Playa who pulled it all together.

Go follow these amazing, generous, hilarious humans on the socials. Instagram handle included for your convenience. In order of first appearance:
• Lori Krikorian (@lori.krikorian.coaching)
• Pete Sibley (@selfkindnesswithpete)
• Simone S.
• Carlos de la Playa (@carlosdelaplaya)
• Danielle Savory (@thepracticeofpleasure)
• Robin Keesler (@robinkeesler)
• Mary Wall (@marywall_coaching)
• Amanda Kingsley (@amandastarkingsley)
• Yael Daphna Saar (@yaelsaar)
• Caitlin Fisher (@caitlinlizfisher)
• Samantha W.
• Tsipa Swan (@tsipaswan)
• Coco Madari (@cocomadari)
• Mattia Maurée (@audhdflourishing / @thelongerroadpodcast)
• Désirée Ferrari (@parentingwithdesiree)
• Lynn Rogala (@aspaciouslife)
• Jenny Respress (@jennyrespress)
• Bryn Bamber (@bryn_bamber)
• Kara Gott Warner (@karagottwarner)
• Erin M. Battles (@erinisvalleyhappy)
• Brandi L. Moran (@brandi_moran_coach)
• Joy Ding (@heya_joy)
• Sarah Magnoni (@iamtherealsocialsarah)
• Cassie Colton (@cassiecoltonauthor)
• Suzanne Culberg (@suzanne_culberg)
• Ahuva Hershkop (@ahuvahershkop)
• Melanie Childers (@melaniechilderscoaching)
• Ma

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9

Welcome to From F*ck Me to F*ck Yeah, with integrative business coach Kristen King!

Starting in Summer 2023, From F*ck Me to F*ck Yeah teaches you how to clear out anything that’s not totally YOU in your business and replace it with something that IS. Because there are as many right ways to run a business as there are entrepreneurs running them. 

You already have the skills you need to start helping people — and start making money — right now. You don’t need to do MORE and HARDER to make it happen. 

You also don’t need to turn off your humanness to succeed — not even if you’re neurodivergent, dealing with chronic health conditions, trying to balance parenting and business, navigating the world with anxiety or depression, or any of the other stuff you thought you needed to make up for. 

You get to have an awesome business right now, exactly as you are. And I’m here to show you how.

Let’s take your business from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" together. 

Learn more about me and my work at http://kristenking.com.

*****
I’m Kristen King, and I’ve been a coach for pretty much my entire professional career — since the early 2000s after my first solo business hit six figures less than 2 years out of college. Now, I teach humans from all walks of life how to shift from "fuck me" to "fuck yeah" so they can thrive in work, business, relationships, health, and more.

Over the last 15+ years, I've worked in for-profit and non-profit organizations across multiple industries, earned an MBA and a master's in publishing, given countless presentations and trainings for groups ranging from 4 to 6,000, and supported clients — both individuals and organizations — on four continents.

This isn't my first rodeo. In fact, there's been a lot of rodeos. So saddle up, friend, because we're about to go on an awesome ride together. I'm so glad you're here.

⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ WANNA KNOW MORE? ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Get your sweet ass onto my email list: https://bit.ly/kkemails

Connect with me on the socials: https://linktr.ee/kristenskoveking

Visit my website to learn more and find out how to hire me as your very own coach: https://kristenking.com

Wanna be on the show? Apply here: https://forms.gle/5VfWcjbXFT2mVtrH9