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From Pilgrims to Pirates to Poultry: The Real Thanksgiving Story
Welcome to the Thanksgiving episode of Insurance Gone Wild — the only show bold enough to connect the Pilgrims, Lloyd’s of London, deep-fried poultry explosions, and Uncle Ron slipping on gravy like it’s Mario Kart.
Dennis brings the history (and weirdly, pirates), Stephanie brings the sarcasm and public safety warnings (mostly required), and together they walk you through why Thanksgiving is basically a disaster waiting to be financially protected.
From frozen-turkey missiles to flaming grills, bad Uber drivers, holiday alcohol confidence, burnt lawns, broken teeth, and the Great Snowpocalypse of 2021 — this episode proves one undeniable fact: the holidays are fun until somebody files a claim.
Grab a plate, grab your policy, and maybe don’t fry anything indoors.
⏱️ CHAPTERS
0:00 — Welcome to Holiday Chaos
Dennis and Stephanie kick off with questionable energy, mild confusion, and zero alcohol. Allegedly.
0:47 — History No One Asked For
Dennis explains the origin of insurance using pilgrims, pirates, and very patient listeners.
4:50 — Stephanie Regrets Her Career Choices
A live internal monologue accidentally leaks out.
9:09 — Pirates Still Exist, Apparently
And somehow this matters to your Thanksgiving.
9:40 — Deep-Frying: The Annual Homeowners’ Deductible Lottery
Also known as: “Is that turkey frozen?” … “Eh, probably fine.”
11:41 — When Holiday Spirit Means Injury
Burned grills, airborne turkeys, broken windows, and suspiciously quick insurance calls.
12:48 — The Drunk Driving Gauntlet
Featuring the world’s least qualified Uber driver and Stephanie’s rising blood pressure.
15:21 — Slippery Gravy & Slipperier Family Dynamics
Liability meets side-eye across the dining table.
16:23 — When the Dog Eats Dinner First
A Great Dane vs a pork loin: spoiler, the dog won.
17:40 — Backyard Football & Broken Fences
Turkey Bowl: A proud American tradition of avoidable claims.
19:57 — Kitchen Fire? Outdoor Fire? All Fires Welcome.
Bonus content: "Deep frying inside is not a personality."
20:45 — Snowmageddon PTSD
Stephanie tries to bring a fire pit indoors. Everyone survives. Barely.
24:10 — The Rare Case of Responsible Thinking
Kerosene heaters, firewood, and no frozen pipes. A holiday miracle.
25:16 — Insurance Companies vs. The Ice Age
Everyone was angry, cold, and Googling "pipe bursts — now what?"
26:13 — Holiday Brains: Scientific Fact™
From Nov 1 to Dec 31: joy, chaos, and questionable judgment skyrocket.
27:18 — Final Thoughts: Try Not to Burn Anything Down
Because your deductible should never be the most expensive part of Thanksgiving.
Want your own chaos story featured?
📞 817-753-0093
Happy Thanksgiving—may your turkey be thawed and your insurance active.
View all episodes
By Insurance Gone WildWelcome to the Thanksgiving episode of Insurance Gone Wild — the only show bold enough to connect the Pilgrims, Lloyd’s of London, deep-fried poultry explosions, and Uncle Ron slipping on gravy like it’s Mario Kart.
Dennis brings the history (and weirdly, pirates), Stephanie brings the sarcasm and public safety warnings (mostly required), and together they walk you through why Thanksgiving is basically a disaster waiting to be financially protected.
From frozen-turkey missiles to flaming grills, bad Uber drivers, holiday alcohol confidence, burnt lawns, broken teeth, and the Great Snowpocalypse of 2021 — this episode proves one undeniable fact: the holidays are fun until somebody files a claim.
Grab a plate, grab your policy, and maybe don’t fry anything indoors.
⏱️ CHAPTERS
0:00 — Welcome to Holiday Chaos
Dennis and Stephanie kick off with questionable energy, mild confusion, and zero alcohol. Allegedly.
0:47 — History No One Asked For
Dennis explains the origin of insurance using pilgrims, pirates, and very patient listeners.
4:50 — Stephanie Regrets Her Career Choices
A live internal monologue accidentally leaks out.
9:09 — Pirates Still Exist, Apparently
And somehow this matters to your Thanksgiving.
9:40 — Deep-Frying: The Annual Homeowners’ Deductible Lottery
Also known as: “Is that turkey frozen?” … “Eh, probably fine.”
11:41 — When Holiday Spirit Means Injury
Burned grills, airborne turkeys, broken windows, and suspiciously quick insurance calls.
12:48 — The Drunk Driving Gauntlet
Featuring the world’s least qualified Uber driver and Stephanie’s rising blood pressure.
15:21 — Slippery Gravy & Slipperier Family Dynamics
Liability meets side-eye across the dining table.
16:23 — When the Dog Eats Dinner First
A Great Dane vs a pork loin: spoiler, the dog won.
17:40 — Backyard Football & Broken Fences
Turkey Bowl: A proud American tradition of avoidable claims.
19:57 — Kitchen Fire? Outdoor Fire? All Fires Welcome.
Bonus content: "Deep frying inside is not a personality."
20:45 — Snowmageddon PTSD
Stephanie tries to bring a fire pit indoors. Everyone survives. Barely.
24:10 — The Rare Case of Responsible Thinking
Kerosene heaters, firewood, and no frozen pipes. A holiday miracle.
25:16 — Insurance Companies vs. The Ice Age
Everyone was angry, cold, and Googling "pipe bursts — now what?"
26:13 — Holiday Brains: Scientific Fact™
From Nov 1 to Dec 31: joy, chaos, and questionable judgment skyrocket.
27:18 — Final Thoughts: Try Not to Burn Anything Down
Because your deductible should never be the most expensive part of Thanksgiving.
Want your own chaos story featured?
📞 817-753-0093
Happy Thanksgiving—may your turkey be thawed and your insurance active.