Generations Community Church

Christians often confuse peace-MAKING with peace-KEEPING. Jesus was a peace-MAKER. That means that he didn't ignore tensions or differences. In fact, Jesus wasn't afraid to disagree with people. Peace-KEEPERS, on the other hand, tend to appease, avoid, and defer to others when tensions arise. True peace will NEVER come by pretending what is wrong is right. In this message (taken from Peter & Geri Scazzero's Emotionally Healthy Relationships), Max Vanderpool will spell out what it does and does not mean to fight cleanly.

Christians often confuse peace-MAKING with peace-KEEPING. Jesus was a peace-MAKER. That means that he didn't ignore tensions or differences. In fact, Jesus wasn't afraid to disagree with people. Peace-KEEPERS, on the other hand, tend to appease, avoid, and defer to others when tensions arise. True peace will NEVER come by pretending what is wrong is right. In this message (taken from Peter & Geri Scazzero's Emotionally Healthy Relationships), Max Vanderpool will spell out what it does and does not mean to fight cleanly.

When was the last time you were with a family member, friend, or co-worker and felt like they weren't listening to you? What were the clues? How did you KNOW they just weren't getting you or getting it? Listening is linked to CARING, which is why it's critical for Christians (followers of Jesus) to learn the art of incarnational listening. Jesus was a good listener, and the world would see his followers (Christians) VERY DIFFERENTLY if they were known for being good listeners. Imagine someone saying, "I know they claim Jesus rose from the dead on the third day, which is just nuts, but man when I'm with Christians I feel seen and I feel heard." In this message, Max Vanderpool unpacks the skill of learning to listen incarnationally.

When was the last time you were with a family member, friend, or co-worker and felt like they weren't listening to you? What were the clues? How did you KNOW they just weren't getting you or getting it? Listening is linked to CARING, which is why it's critical for Christians (followers of Jesus) to learn the art of incarnational listening. Jesus was a good listener, and the world would see his followers (Christians) VERY DIFFERENTLY if they were known for being good listeners. Imagine someone saying, "I know they claim Jesus rose from the dead on the third day, which is just nuts, but man when I'm with Christians I feel seen and I feel heard." In this message, Max Vanderpool unpacks the skill of learning to listen incarnationally.

In life, there is a continuum of emotionally compromised people. Some lean toward OVER-regulating their emotions, pushing negative feelings deep down into their heart and soul, hoping that those highly charged and highly negative emotions will simply disappear or fade away over time. Others lean toward UNDER-regulating their emotions, expressing EVERY passing feeling they have with robust intensity. BOTH ends of the continuum are unhealthy. BOTH ends of the continuum will hamstring your relationships. In this message, Max Vanderpool makes a case for why becoming more like Jesus means becoming more emotionally self-aware.

In life, there is a continuum of emotionally compromised people. Some lean toward OVER-regulating their emotions, pushing negative feelings deep down into their heart and soul, hoping that those highly charged and highly negative emotions will simply disappear or fade away over time. Others lean toward UNDER-regulating their emotions, expressing EVERY passing feeling they have with robust intensity. BOTH ends of the continuum are unhealthy. BOTH ends of the continuum will hamstring your relationships. In this message, Max Vanderpool makes a case for why becoming more like Jesus means becoming more emotionally self-aware.

Imagine a husband who calls every day from work. One day, however, he doesn't call. The husband and wife had had an argument the night before, the but the wife thought it had been resolved. Now, in the wake of no phone call, she begins to wonder if she was mistaken. Perhaps her husband IS still angry. Perhaps he's pulling some kind of passive-aggressive tactic (the kind HIS father used). Later that night when both the husband and wife are home, the wife says nothing (all the while stewing inside about her inconsiderate husband). She goes to bed early angry and alone. The next morning, the husband is behaving as though NOTHING had happened, and right before leaving for work he tells her, "I'm so sorry I didn't call you yesterday. We had an emergency at work, and I was stuck in a team meeting without my phone for over four hours. I want you to know I missed you, and I love you." In THAT moment, the wife realizes that what she had ASSUMED about her husband was NOT the case. In this message, Pastor Max articulates a relationship skill NEEDED for cultivating HEALTHY relationships...in your family, with friends and church family, and with co-workers.

Imagine a husband who calls every day from work. One day, however, he doesn't call. The husband and wife had had an argument the night before, the but the wife thought it had been resolved. Now, in the wake of no phone call, she begins to wonder if she was mistaken. Perhaps her husband IS still angry. Perhaps he's pulling some kind of passive-aggressive tactic (the kind HIS father used). Later that night when both the husband and wife are home, the wife says nothing (all the while stewing inside about her inconsiderate husband). She goes to bed early angry and alone. The next morning, the husband is behaving as though NOTHING had happened, and right before leaving for work he tells her, "I'm so sorry I didn't call you yesterday. We had an emergency at work, and I was stuck in a team meeting without my phone for over four hours. I want you to know I missed you, and I love you." In THAT moment, the wife realizes that what she had ASSUMED about her husband was NOT the case. In this message, Pastor Max articulates a relationship skill NEEDED for cultivating HEALTHY relationships...in your family, with friends and church family, and with co-workers.

Everybody's got an angle, or so it would seem. Friends, family members, and co-workers sometimes disappoint us, because it becomes apparent (over time) that their interest in us in ONLY because of what we will do for them. It's a take-give relationship (they take, we give). Unfortunately, too many of us take that disappointment and place it at God's feet, assuming that God will be just like these friends, family members, or acquaintances. But He is not. Jesus truly is the good shepherd, and because Jesus doesn't seek to get anything OUT of the sheep he leads, he's WORTH following.

Everybody's got an angle, or so it would seem. Friends, family members, and co-workers sometimes disappoint us, because it becomes apparent (over time) that their interest in us in ONLY because of what we will do for them. It's a take-give relationship (they take, we give). Unfortunately, too many of us take that disappointment and place it at God's feet, assuming that God will be just like these friends, family members, or acquaintances. But He is not. Jesus truly is the good shepherd, and because Jesus doesn't seek to get anything OUT of the sheep he leads, he's WORTH following.